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lacrossechica86

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  1. AHHH.... hey everyone, Whats Up? so i have like this Huge PROBLEM how do u stop talking to someone u care for sooo much but u know is sooo bad to be with?!!?!?!?!? alrite this is how it is... i meet this guy Ryan this summer at my work and he and my best friend Jenna like hit it off really well and everything, i at the time already had a b\f from a couple of months. well ryan lets just say had a bad rep and of course b\c Jenna is soo forgiveing and caring she saw past all the bad that ryan had. And even got me to see throught it.. while everyone at work seemed to hate ryan and not get along with him me and Jenna began spending lots of time out side of work with Ryan. He seemed really cool and aways had something sweet and flatering to say to use. My boyfriend at the ttime hated Ryan with a passion. and now even more b\c i was spending time with him. he kept telling me how ryan was soo bad etc. i just ignored everything he said and thought much less of my b\f at the time for not giving ryan a chance and judging him b4 he knew him!!! And yes me and my b\f broke up b\c one night i ditched him to spend time with ryan and lied soo we broke up... SO after this Ryan was there for me and always told ervything was going to get better and that i was better then that and didnt need him nemore... WAIT i forgot to mention one thing Ryan IS 2 YEARS older then me and Jenna soo we felt all specaial and what not b\c an 18 yr old is hang'n arouns with u ... But back to what i was saying soo for like the last month and 1\2 i have spend like evry night talkin to ryan for endless hr and everything i had now saw that side to ryan that Jenna had long before... but then this is when everything went down hill... while all i did for a long time was talk to Ryan i pushed all my good friends from school and field hockey out of my life b\c i knew that no matter how bad of a day i was having id have Ryan do go home to and talk to . but while i was doing this i came to a realization that Ryan is really not good news... im sick of hearing about his "GOOD NIGHTS" smoking pot and getting laid i dont do those things and i mean i use to think that if u do them thats great for u like i wont hate u for it but now after everything Ryan has told me about them ur pretty goddamn stupid to do them... and lieki think of him on soo less of a scale then i ever have ne one before... I dont want to talk to Ryan nemore well as much as i do... i dont think that its good for me as a person and i mean not to mention that he doesnt have his act to gether at all he has no futue plans and evrything and by me talking to him he had this way of making me think that it didnt matter if i just let everythuing i cared for goo b\c like itd all be good in the end... well i cant do it nemore i cant pretend to not care about school,, that smoking pot is cool and everything i just dont know what to do now.. i dont know how to stop talkin to him with out hurtting him and him hating me i dont know,,, what to say and even if i shoud say some thing!?!?!?!?! OH MAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE.....!!!! thanxs for reading this i know its long but thanxs and please help me .. you can im me netime or email me ~alyssa~
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