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  • Olivia Sanders
    Olivia Sanders

    How I Stop Feeling Bad About Myself And Start Feeling Better

    Key Takeaways:

    • Shift mindset quickly
    • Embrace self-compassion
    • Engage in simple activities
    • Celebrate small victories
    • Seek positive connections

    We have all been there. You wake up, look in the mirror, and just can't shake the nagging feeling that you feel bad about yourself. Maybe you had a rough day at work, or perhaps you compared yourself to someone else's seemingly perfect life online. Suddenly, you think, “I feel terrible about myself.” We are often our own worst critics, and that feeling can creep in without warning. If you've ever wondered, “How do I stop feeling bad about myself?” you're not alone. Just acknowledging that you feel bad for yourself is a powerful first step. From there, you can choose to respond in ways that help you feel better.

    When I feel bad about myself, I try to remember that these emotions do not define me. Negative self-talk and inner doubt might flood my brain, but I have the power to shape how I move forward. Over time, I've gathered a set of practical, research-backed strategies that help me counter those tough moments. As a therapist, I know these tools matter. Psychological theories, like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), emphasize that our thoughts influence our feelings and actions. By challenging the negative beliefs that emerge when you're feeling bad about yourself, you can set the stage for more uplifting emotions and behaviors. It's not about perfection, but rather about progress and self-understanding.

    This article walks you through the simple things I do when I feel terrible about myself. I share these steps because they might help you find a way forward the next time that feeling creeps in. Let's explore these concrete actions and how they link to the psychological principles behind self-worth and emotional well-being.

    Simple Steps That Help Me Shift My Mindset

    I write down everything I'm grateful for.

    When I feel bad about myself, I often start by making a list of things I appreciate in my life. Gratitude is a powerful tool, anchored in the field of positive psychology. Researchers have found that focusing on what you're thankful for helps shift attention away from self-criticism and encourages a more optimistic outlook. Sometimes it's as small as, “I'm grateful for having clean water and a safe place to sleep.” Other times, it's more personal: “I'm grateful for the friend who checked in on me yesterday.” In that moment of feeling bad, flipping the script towards gratitude challenges the brain's negativity bias—our natural inclination to focus on problems. Over time, these lists help train your mind to notice good things more naturally, giving you an immediate way to feel better.

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    I take a walk to clear my mind.

    Physical movement outside the home offers immediate mental health benefits. When you feel terrible about yourself, a brief walk can create space from negative thoughts. Stepping outdoors changes the scenery, giving the brain a reason to shift gears. You engage more senses: the breeze on your face, the crunch of leaves underfoot, and the warmth of the sun. This sensory input can disrupt spirals of negative thinking. Behavioral Activation, a concept in therapy, suggests that taking small, positive actions—even when you don't feel like it—can improve your mood. A walk is a simple yet effective step to lighten that feeling of self-doubt and make you feel better in a matter of minutes.

    I move my body and get my blood flowing.

    Exercise releases endorphins, which serve as natural mood enhancers. Even a short session of yoga, jumping jacks, or dancing to a favorite song can significantly improve how you feel about yourself. Neuroscientific research shows that physical activity increases the production of neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine, which improve mood and reduce stress. This effect can break the cycle of negative thoughts that often arise when you're feeling bad about yourself. As you move, you remind yourself that your body, regardless of shape or size, can bring joy and relief. This reframes your perception of self-worth, shifting it from shame or disappointment toward appreciation for what your body can do.

    I use a journal to express myself.

    When I feel bad about myself, words and art become my allies. Whether you write down what's bothering you or sketch an image that represents your feelings, journaling provides a safe space to process emotions. Writing freely can help you identify the specific thoughts fueling your discomfort. This approach aligns with CBT principles—once you can see the negative thoughts, you can challenge and reframe them. Journaling also helps you track progress over time. Eventually, you'll notice patterns, realize certain triggers, and learn strategies to cope more effectively. The simple act of putting pen to paper makes your inner world more tangible, guiding you toward new insights and a sense of relief.

    I immerse myself in a creative project.

    When I feel bad for myself, crafting helps me shift that energy into something productive. Whether it's knitting, painting, woodworking, or even creating a collage, a craft project engages the mind in a positive, goal-oriented task. Psychologists often promote art therapy techniques, noting that these activities help externalize emotions, reduce stress, and foster a sense of accomplishment. The process itself can be meditative, allowing you to flow into a state of focused calm. Crafting doesn't need to be perfect; the point is the process. When you finish, you have something tangible that represents effort, creativity, and resilience—qualities that highlight your worth.

    I reconnect with people who matter.

    When you're feeling bad about yourself, isolation can intensify those emotions. Human beings thrive on connection. Reaching out to loved ones—whether it's a quick phone call, a heart-to-heart over coffee, or a supportive text—can remind you that you are not alone. According to attachment theory, meaningful relationships provide a secure base that nurtures emotional well-being. Sharing your feelings with someone who cares about you often leads to validation, reassurance, and maybe even a laugh. That sense of belonging can quickly counteract the hopelessness that sneaks in when you feel terrible about yourself. Remember that vulnerability can lead to stronger connections and a reminder that others value you more than you might realize in your toughest moments.

    I nourish myself with wholesome snacks.

    When I feel bad about myself, I notice my body's signals. Sometimes, the gloom intensifies if I haven't eaten balanced meals or if I keep munching on sugary, processed foods. Good nutrition supports mental health. Whole foods rich in vitamins, minerals, and healthy fats help stabilize blood sugar and mood. Research in nutritional psychiatry has shown a strong link between diet and emotional well-being. While a piece of dark chocolate can bring comfort, pairing it with a handful of almonds or fresh fruit nourishes both body and mind. Cooking a simple, healthy snack or meal transforms a fleeting “I feel bad for myself” into an act of self-care. Eating well affirms that you deserve kindness—even from yourself.

    I remind myself that everyone feels low sometimes.

    No one goes through life without feeling bad about themselves at some point. Even people who seem confident struggle with insecurities and self-doubt. Recognizing that these moments are universal reduces the sense of isolation. As renowned researcher Brené Brown wrote, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we'll ever do.” Embrace your humanity. Knowing that feeling bad about yourself is a shared human experience can dissolve shame, helping you accept that emotions come and go, and do not define your worth. You are not uniquely flawed or broken—you are simply human.

    I lift my mood by helping others.

    When you feel terrible about yourself, doing something kind for another person can create a meaningful shift. Altruism, even in small doses, boosts mood and sense of purpose. Maybe you hold the door open for someone, pay a compliment to a coworker, or send a supportive message to a friend who's struggling. Research shows that acts of kindness increase happiness levels and help counter feelings of worthlessness. By seeing yourself as capable of brightening someone else's day, you gain a more balanced perspective on your own value. You prove to yourself that, even when feeling bad, you can still impact the world positively.

    I spend time with my furry companions.

    Animals offer unconditional positive regard—something that can feel scarce when you feel bad about yourself. Pets do not judge your appearance, career achievements, or bank balance. They simply enjoy your presence. Studies have shown that spending time with pets lowers stress hormones and can reduce feelings of loneliness. Stroking a dog's fur, playing with a cat, or even watching fish swim calmly can soothe the nervous system. These moments remind you that you are worthy of love and care, even when you struggle to offer it to yourself. Caring for a pet also nurtures a sense of responsibility and purpose—both of which counteract feelings of worthlessness.

    I take a mindful drive.

    Hopping in the car and going for a drive, with no particular destination, provides an environment to think, reflect, and process emotions. Movement can lull the mind into a more receptive state. This quiet space—no television, no pressing demands—creates a pocket of mental calm. Driving mindfully also means tuning in to the moment: noticing the scenery, paying attention to your breathing, and staying present. This can alleviate some internal tension. While you might leave the house feeling terrible about yourself, returning after a calm drive often brings a hint of clarity and equilibrium. You gain mental room to realize that tough feelings pass with time and self-compassion.

    I practice a bit of self-care.

    When I feel bad about myself, pampering acts as a counterbalance. Maybe it's a warm bath with Epsom salts, a calming face mask, or wrapping yourself in a cozy blanket with a good book. Self-care sends a direct message to your mind: “I matter.” Psychologist Kristin Neff's research on self-compassion encourages treating oneself as kindly as you would a close friend. By nurturing your body with soothing rituals, you reinforce a sense of worthiness. Over time, these small acts add up, making it easier to combat that initial “I feel terrible about myself” thought with a quieter, more caring internal voice.

    I plan for something fun ahead.

    When you're feeling bad about yourself, the present moment can feel suffocating. Scheduling something to look forward to—even something small, like trying a new coffee shop or planning a weekend trip—restores a sense of control and optimism. Anticipation activates regions of the brain associated with reward and motivation. This mental shift changes your relationship with the future, reminding you that current feelings do not determine your destiny. By placing something positive on the horizon, you create hope. As author David D. Burns noted in his classic “Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy,” “When you change the way you think, you can change the way you feel.” Turning your attention to future plans helps change how you think about yourself, reinforcing resilience over despair.

    I rediscover memories through old photos.

    In moments of self-doubt, flipping through old photos can serve as a gentle reminder that you have faced difficulties before and still survived. Those snapshots might show you laughing with friends, celebrating a birthday, or exploring a new city. Each image represents a chapter of your life story—one where you overcame obstacles or learned something about yourself. Reflecting on these memories encourages a balanced view of who you are. You are not defined by the current feeling of worthlessness. You are a complex person with a rich history, triumphs, and growth. By remembering these moments, you challenge the narrow lens of negative self-perception.

    I calm my mind with meditation.

    Meditation brings you back to the present moment. When you feel bad about yourself, your mind likely spins with fears, regrets, and self-critical comparisons. Mindfulness techniques encourage observing these thoughts without judgment. Through meditation, you learn that thoughts and feelings pass like clouds in the sky. Regular practice reshapes brain pathways, making it easier to detach from harmful narratives. In the long run, this reduces the intensity and duration of feeling bad about yourself. You gain the skill to watch a negative thought float by without seizing it as truth. Even a few minutes of focused breathing can reset your emotional baseline, offering a more compassionate lens through which to see yourself.

    Understanding the Psychology Behind Feeling Bad About Yourself

    When you feel terrible about yourself, you're often battling internalized beliefs and expectations that have built up over time. These beliefs can stem from childhood experiences, social comparisons, cultural standards, and critical internal voices. According to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, the way we interpret events, rather than the events themselves, shapes our emotions. If you interpret a mistake at work as a sign of personal failure, you'll naturally feel worse about yourself than if you see it as a learning opportunity. Likewise, if you criticize your appearance harshly, you'll feel less confident and more disheartened.

    Self-esteem theory emphasizes that people strive for a stable sense of self-worth, which can waver when confronted with challenges. The frustration often comes when self-criticism takes over. We become stuck in a cycle: feeling bad about ourselves, which leads to less motivation and more negative thoughts, which in turn reinforce those bad feelings. Breaking this cycle requires conscious effort. That effort includes awareness, self-compassion, and actively challenging distorted beliefs. Over time, you can rewrite your internal story, shaping a more forgiving and supportive relationship with yourself.

    Another key principle involves understanding that emotions follow attention. If you continually fixate on what's wrong, you reinforce neural pathways associated with negative thinking. Shifting focus to actions—like walking, journaling, connecting with friends—lets you channel attention into healthier directions. You learn that feeling bad is just an emotional state, not a defining feature of your identity. Employing strategies like gratitude lists, meditation, and self-care routines trains the brain to recognize and appreciate what is good and worthwhile in you and in your life.

    Why These Strategies Work Over Time

    Implementing these steps helps because they all share a common thread: empowerment. Instead of waiting for the bad feelings to vanish, you take active steps toward well-being. These activities also align with various psychological frameworks:

    • Cognitive Reframing: Gratitude lists, journaling, and looking at old photos shift your perspective, allowing you to see yourself as resilient rather than flawed.
    • Behavioral Activation: Walking, exercising, crafting, and driving represent actions that break the inertia of feeling bad about yourself. Engaging in activities leads to improved mood, which fuels more activity and less rumination.
    • Self-Compassion: Meditation, pampering, and nurturing relationships encourage treating yourself with kindness rather than harsh judgment. This approach softens the edges of self-criticism.
    • Emotional Regulation: Nutritious foods, spending time with pets, and spreading kindness help stabilize emotions, reminding you that you have control over how you respond to feeling bad.

    With repeated practice, these strategies become habits, making it easier to bounce back when negative feelings resurface. Over time, your self-perception evolves, strengthening your emotional resilience and ability to manage difficult feelings.

    Embracing Your Human Complexity

    No matter how terrible you feel about yourself at any given moment, remember that you contain multitudes. You are more than a single experience, a passing emotion, or a perceived shortcoming. Embracing complexity means acknowledging that feeling bad is not a personal failing, but an aspect of being human. By exploring these practical strategies—whether it's walking, meditation, or calling a friend—you weave a safety net for your emotional well-being. The next time you feel bad about yourself, think of these steps as stepping stones guiding you toward a lighter, more compassionate place.

    Recommended Resources

    • “The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brené Brown
    • “Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy” by David D. Burns, M.D.
    • “Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself” by Kristin Neff, Ph.D.
    • “The Mindful Way Through Depression” by Mark Williams et al.
    • “Daring Greatly” by Brené Brown

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