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  • Natalie Garcia
    Natalie Garcia

    What Should I Do When My Feelings Aren't Reciprocated?

    Dear eNotAlone: I'm having an incredibly hard time grasping how to handle my relationship situation. It all started when I met a guy about a year and a half ago. We were friends for a while, and as we got closer, my feelings for him developed into more than just friendship. We would talk every day, and I felt like he also had feelings for me too. We went on a few dates, but he suddenly stopped talking to me one day without any explanation. Since then, I thought it was a sign that he wasn't interested in me and that my feelings weren't reciprocated.

    However, recently he has been trying to communicate with me again, both through texting and face-to-face conversations. He constantly tells me I'm special, but he never makes any gestures or attempts to move our relationship further. It feels like he is stringing me along, leading me on and yet not making any commitments. I'm so confused and unsure of what my next step should be. Should I keep hanging out with him, or should I distance myself? Neither feels right, and I don't know what the best option is for me. How can I make sense of this situation and decide what is best for me?

    * * *

    When you are feeling frustrated and confused about what is happening in your relationship, it is important to remember that it is ultimately up to you to decide the best course of action. Nobody can tell you what to do, and it is crucial to stay true to yourself and your feelings. Being in a complicated situation like this can be difficult and confusing, but there are things you can do to help make sense of it.

    The first thing to consider is why your relationship changed from platonic friendship to something more. If it is indeed the case that your feelings remain unrequited, it is necessary for you to consider why he is continuing to reach out and include you in his life. Is it because he does have some sort of interest that he is not willing to act on? It is important to come to terms with this concept, and to understand how you feel about it. Are you ok with being just friends, or is the situation too complicated for you to continue like this? If so, it may be best to part ways and walk away from the relationship.

    It is also important to think about what you want out of the relationship, and to make sure that whatever decision you make aligns with those wants. Ask yourself why you are still interested in this person, and whether or not you believe that being around him is contributing to your overall well being. Are you starting to feel emotionally drained and exhausted by this situation, or are you finding some comfort in your relationship? Being honest and direct with yourself will help you on the path towards finding out what you truly deserve.

    If you eventually decide that the path you have chosen is not right for you, there are resources available to help you. Talking to a counsellor about what you are going through can help to provide a fresh perspective and support during a difficult time in your life. Reaching out to others who have gone through similar experiences can also be incredibly valuable. There are many people out there who are willing to openly share their stories and offer advice and understanding. Most importantly, make sure to take care of yourself. Even though you are in the middle of a complicated relationship, it is still important to give yourself the love and attention you need to be happy and healthy.

    No matter what you decide, the most important thing is that you focus on what is best for you. Choose the path that makes you feel happiest and allows you to live authentically, and have faith that no matter what you will eventually end up where you are meant to be.

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