Overcoming Shyness in Relationships

When you’re shy, it can be terribly daunting to become involved in any kind of “relationship”. Whether with friends, colleagues or a romantic partner, the fear of being judged, rejected or misunderstood can be paralyzing. This doesn’t mean you can’t ever overcome your shyness and find yourself already enriched by others, both emotionally and intellectually. It just takes a bit of determination and hard work.

The first step is understanding your shyness and why it affects you. Are there any experiences in your past which have led to what you’re feeling now? It could be anything from an embarrassing moment to an incident that hurt your self-esteem. Once you’ve identified what has led to these feelings, you’ll be able to take comfort in the fact that you’ve identified the source of your troubles and can start working towards healing them.

One way to start is to look for opportunities to be sociable. This doesn’t necessarily mean joining clubs or anything elaborate like that; it simply means creating chances for yourself to interact with others, whether it’s a lone stranger or a large group of people. Don’t expect too much to begin with – try engaging in small chat over coffee or striking up a conversation at a party. Showing that you’re confident and approachable is always a great start.

Once you’re comfortable interacting with smaller amounts of people, you can gradually move on to larger groups. As with anything else in life, practice makes perfect and it’s no different when it comes to social interactions. You’ll begin to observe how conversations flow and join in when you feel comfortable. It will also help to remind yourself that everyone feels awkward or uncomfortable some of the time; it’s the ability to connect despite these anxieties that make for lasting relationships.

Finally, be patient and understanding with yourself. Establishing relationships does take a certain amount of vulnerability, and you probably won’t feel happy and secure in any relationship until you learn how to let someone into your innermost circles. Yet if you persevere and keep in mind the important components needed for healthy relationships, you’ll find yourself building meaningful connections in no time at all.