How do I deal with my partner's jealousy?

Jealousy can be such an ugly emotion. But instead of turning a blind eye when your partner lets it take hold, there are techniques you can use to help them cope – and save your relationship in the process.

When jealousy rears its ugly head in a relationship, it can feel like a monster looming over you and your partner. But there is hope. Working together, you can get through this negative emotion. Do not ignore your partner's feelings, however uncomfortable they may be. Ignoring the situation may cause them to withdraw even further into themselves. Reassure your partner that they have nothing to be jealous about and that you do not intend to hurt them.

An important first step is to understand why they are feeling this way. Typically, jealousy is rooted in anxiety and insecurity, either caused by past trauma or lack of self-esteem. Ask thoughtful questions and let them express their concerns without interruption or judgement. Truly listening and then responding with empathy will help them feel understood and less isolated.

If an insecure feeling persists, try to soothe them. Remind them of your love and dedication to them. Provide gentle reminders of positive experiences you both share. Consider taking your partner on a date to reconnect and remind them of all the reasons why you care for them.

Another possible solution is to set boundaries. Let your partner know what you are comfortable with and show them that their feelings are respected. Making sure you each understand the other’s expectations and boundaries can help to build trust, which is the foundation of any healthy relationship. As long as your actions accurately reflect your words and intentions, trust is bound to develop over time.

Although trying to balance a partner’s insecurity can be challenging and exhausting, it is important to practice self-care during this time. Take a break if and when it is needed but remember that talking through things is essential to repairing any tension. Physical acts of kindness can also go a long way. If your partner’s feelings of insecurity come up again, providing a hug can ease some of their doubts.

Jealousy can often feel like you are fighting an endless battle but with time, effort and patience, it can be mastered. If a partner’s jealousy becomes too intense, do not hesitate to seek professional help. They might be able to provide further techniques and insight beyond what can be accomplished between the two of you.

In the end, understanding your partner’s emotions and reassuring them will help to create a safe, secure and loving environment for both of you.