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  • Natalie Garcia
    Natalie Garcia

    How Can I Handle the Deterioration of My Relationship?

    Dear Jae,

    I've been holding back tears for too long, holding onto all these negative emotions that have built up over our time together. I want to start off by saying I'm sorry; this isn't an easy letter to write and it pains me to tell you what I must.

    I can't take this anymore. All the mess we're in is tearing us apart, slowly yet surely. It's threatening to weigh us down, to the point where neither of us can move forward. We're so close, but I feel the distance growing.

    You say you love me, that you'd do anything to make this work. But nothing is changing. I'm stuck here in a position I can't seem to get out. You're not making any effort, or if you are it's not enough.

    We had so much hope, such an incredible connection; it felt like a dream. I never expected it to end this way, never wanted us to falter like this.

    It's hard to think that I'm at a place again where trust is gone, where I fear that if I let go of your hand I'll be walking away without you.

    Maybe it's all me, maybe I don't trust myself to stay put. To me, this all just seems like the same old mistake, one that I won't commit again.

    You told me you'd never hurt me, and here I am feeling like I am, trying so hard to find solace in a hug, only finding emptiness.

    Should I have known better? I thought I could trust you, even with my heart on my sleeve. Maybe I was naïve.

    I know these words are hard to hear, and they're harsher than they should be. But they carry more truth than denial can hide. This isn't the person I want to be, and I don't want to be a statistic like the ones before me. Yet, I can't ignore the red flag anymore.

    So here I am, writing to you with a heavy heart, not wanting to push you away, but wishing to let go of some of the pain that has built up.

    I wish I could turn back time, to when I felt safe with you, to when we both felt like this could really work. I hate that those moments have been wiped away, that all that happens from here on out must be taken one step at a time.

    I still care for you deeply, and I never wanted any of this to happen. But maybe it's time for both of us to look away and focus on ourselves.

    Relationships can be complicated, and when things start going wrong it can feel like the situation is escalating quickly. To prevent further damage, it's important to recognize when a relationship isn't working and act on it before more hurt accumulates.

    The first step is to identify what has caused the decline of the relationship. It could be a lack of communication, unresolved arguments, building resentments, or something else entirely. Whatever the issue, it's important to be honest with yourself and your partner about what has gone wrong, and how each of you can contribute towards making amends.

    Once the underlying causes are acknowledged, it's important to talk to your partner and work together on solutions. This could mean coming together to set boundaries or expectations, attending couples therapy, or taking some time apart to reflect on what went wrong and how you can both take responsibility for the situation. No matter what you decide, it's important to reassess and listen to each other's needs.

    If the situation has deteriorated to a point where the relationship is irreparable, it is important to remember that it's OK to let go. Making a clean break is often much healthier than staying in an unhealthy relationship, and it can give each party the chance to focus on themselves and find new ways to move forward.

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