It may seem like one of the toughest parts of being a parent is helping your teen daughter find motivation and drive. When she has aspirations and dreams but appears to lack the gumption or energy to put them into motion, it can be immensely discouraging for everyone involved.
Even though you love your daughter and want nothing more than for her to know true joy, there are times when her stubbornness or laid-back approach to life conflicts with your expectations. In these cases, providing guidance and structure can seem like a difficult task — and it's hard not to worry that all your advice will do little to get her off the starting line.
If you find yourself in a situation where your teen daughter has goals but won't take action, there are ways you can adequately guide them on their path to success.
Help Find Sources of Coaches, Mentors, And the Necessary Skills
Though having dreams is a frequent source of encouragement, often times there's an extra push needed to ensure those goals become a reality. One avenue that has proven extremely successful when it comes to helping teens convert dreams into measurable results is having a coach or mentor as a teacher, manager, and likely friend as well. These mentors should not just speak statements of affirmation – they also need to provide specific direction.
In addition to uncovering the correct support system, equipping your teen daughter with the necessary skills is essential. This can be easily achieved by purchasing books, enrolling in online classes, or asking experts for advice. If a certain skill is proving difficult, try signing up for local lessons at libraries or community centers. Encouraging your daughter to attend a class or two can lead to much greater confidence in getting to work.
Encourage Healthy Relationships
Nothing hinders progress quite like negative influences and toxic relationships. For mental and emotional stability, it's important to ensure your daughter has the right people to talk to during worrisome times. Establish healthy boundaries with anyone who might be a negative source of energy and instead give your daughter the opportunity to explore and make her own mistakes as she works to achieve her goals.
Help With Planning
Without a plan, it can be a daunting task to move from having only aspirations to taking practical steps towards achieving them. Develop milestones and short-term goals and establish tangible deadlines for each. provide your teen daughter with the appropriate tools – such as a calendar, a goal-setting journal, or a whiteboard — so she can see her plans in action. Talk about her goals with her, ask her what she needs from you, and figure out the paths she wants to take. Furthermore, provide a space that is free from any distractions and lets her stay motivated while putting her goals into motion.
Offer Kind Encouragement
Above all else, as a parent you must remind your teen daughter that you have her best interests in mind and that you're always around to provide support and listen. As she attempts to complete tasks and take steps towards progress, it's natural that she may find herself feeling intimidated. Show her that you're proud of her no matter the results, encourage her through small wins, and remind her that she is capable of making her dreams come true.
Sometimes backing up the amount of enthusiasm you think a dream or goal deserves may feel difficult. But when you remind yourself about the importance of inspiring your daughter and proving to her that you believe in her, you'll be more willing to offer your utmost support.
Sometimes all of the strategies mentioned above won't result in a shift in your daughter's behavior. Nevertheless, this doesn't mean that all hope is lost. Talk to her and find out why she doesn't feel compelled to move forward. Pay attention to the change you'd like to see, provide help where necessary but don't do everything for her, and remind her of the importance of action. show her that you believe in her and that achieving her aspirations is only partial of the reward.
If you feel like you're constantly working to get your teen daughter to take action when it comes to setting and reaching her goals, remember that this is natural. With careful planning, mentoring, and patience, you will inevitably come closer to working towards a healthy and supportive relationship with her. Try to look at each failure as an opportunity to learn, and eventually she'll find the perfect equation of determination and hard work that leads to success.