Healing After a Suicide Attempt: 5 Key Tips

Key Takeaways:

• Healing after an attempt is possible
• Immediate self-care is essential
• Talking openly can be freeing
• Identify triggers for better coping
• Support systems are crucial

After attempting suicide, many of us find ourselves in a world that feels entirely changed. The days that follow can be filled with pain, confusion, and a profound sense of isolation. You might feel a weight of shame, wondering how you'll ever face the world again. But let me tell you this: surviving a suicide attempt means you've been given a second chance. It's a testament to your inner strength, even if you don't see it yet.

Healing is a process—often a long and bumpy one—but it's entirely possible. And you're not alone on this journey. Many others have been where you are now and have found their way to a better, brighter place. In this article, we'll explore practical steps and psychological insights to help you find a path forward. Let's take it one step at a time, together.

Surviving After a Suicide Attempt

Let's face it—surviving a suicide attempt can feel like waking up to an entirely new reality. It's disorienting, overwhelming, and filled with emotions that may leave you questioning everything. You might feel a mix of confusion, fear, or even numbness. And that's okay. It's not uncommon to feel lost after an attempt; you're trying to navigate your way through a storm that no one else can see. But here's the truth: you're still here. Despite the darkness, you held on, and that's something powerful.

Psychologists often describe this moment as a "second life." According to Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison, author of Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide, “surviving a suicide attempt often shifts one's perspective on what's important, sparking a desire to find meaning again.” While it may not feel like it now, this is an opportunity to rebuild—one small, gentle step at a time. Embrace the fact that you're starting anew, and while the journey may seem steep, it's not one you have to take alone.

Immediate Steps Right After an Attempt

The moments immediately after a suicide attempt are critical. Your body, mind, and spirit have just gone through an intense ordeal, and it's essential to focus on immediate care. In these early stages, give yourself permission to rest. It might feel like there's pressure to explain, apologize, or justify what happened, but right now, your priority should be your own well-being.

Consider reaching out to a trusted friend, family member, or a mental health professional who can offer you a safe space to process everything. If you're in a hospital or under the care of medical professionals, let them guide you through this time. According to trauma specialist Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, “our bodies and minds need time to stabilize after trauma, and being surrounded by compassionate support is crucial.” Remember, you deserve care, even if it doesn't feel that way right now.

Facing Feelings of Guilt & Shame

Guilt and shame can be two of the heaviest weights to carry after an attempted suicide. You might replay the event over and over in your mind, wondering what you could have done differently. These feelings can make it difficult to open up to others, reinforcing that isolating wall we often build. But here's the thing: guilt and shame are emotions rooted in our internal narrative, not necessarily in reality.

Understanding that these feelings don't define you is crucial. According to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), one effective approach is to challenge these negative thoughts. Ask yourself: “What would I say to a friend feeling this way?” Often, we are kinder to others than we are to ourselves. You're not a failure for having struggled. Instead, you've taken a step toward healing, and that's worth acknowledging.

Processing Your Trauma

Attempting suicide is a traumatic event, not just for you, but potentially for those around you. Trauma isn't just about what happened; it's also about how it made you feel and how it changed your view of yourself and the world. After the initial shock, you might find yourself dealing with flashbacks, anxiety, or an overwhelming sense of dread. This is part of the healing process, but it can be incredibly exhausting.

One approach to working through this trauma is through therapy—especially trauma-focused therapy like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) or trauma-informed counseling. These methods can help reprocess painful memories in a way that reduces their emotional impact. You deserve the chance to process these feelings in a safe environment where you're understood. Healing from trauma isn't linear, and it doesn't mean erasing what happened; it's about learning to live with it in a healthier way.

If You're Still in a Crisis

If you're still in the thick of it—if the thoughts of ending your life haven't entirely faded—it's vital to seek help immediately. Feeling overwhelmed and lost is an incredibly difficult place to be, but you don't have to navigate this darkness alone. Many people struggle in silence, convinced that asking for help is a sign of weakness, but it's quite the opposite. Reaching out takes immense courage, especially when your mind tells you that it's not worth it.

Don't hesitate to contact a suicide hotline or a trusted person in your life. Text or call someone, even if it's just to say, “I'm not okay.” The act of simply voicing what you're feeling can break the isolation, even if it's just a little. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention suggests that connecting with others in these critical moments can help shift your perspective, even if only momentarily.

Also, if you've been prescribed medication or are under a therapist's care, now is the time to lean into those resources. Take it one hour at a time, one breath at a time. A crisis feels eternal, but it is temporary—even if that's hard to believe right now. Remember, we need you here, and there is help available to guide you through this storm.

Opening Up About Your Attempt

Telling others about your suicide attempt can feel like exposing a deep, raw wound. You might worry about being judged, misunderstood, or burdening those around you. But here's the thing: talking about it can be one of the most healing steps you take. It allows you to lift the weight off your chest, if only just a bit. In fact, opening up about your experience can reduce feelings of shame and isolation. But there's no rush—only share when you feel ready.

It's okay to start small. You might choose to confide in one trusted person, whether it's a close friend, a family member, or even a therapist. Let them know that you're looking for understanding, not solutions. It's about being heard. As Dr. Brené Brown, a leading researcher on vulnerability, says, “Shame cannot survive being spoken. It cannot survive empathy.” When you speak your truth, it often loses some of its power over you.

And if you're not ready to talk to someone directly, consider writing about your experience in a journal or a letter that you may never send. This can help organize your thoughts and release some of the emotional pressure. Remember, your story is yours to share when and how you choose. The right people will listen without judgment and stand by you.

Navigating Conversations at Work

Talking about your suicide attempt at work can feel like walking on eggshells. On one hand, you may want to keep your private life private. On the other, you might feel the need to explain prolonged absences or changes in behavior. The decision to disclose is entirely yours, and it's important to weigh the benefits and potential risks before sharing this deeply personal experience. The workplace can be a tricky environment, especially if you're unsure of how your colleagues or supervisors will react.

Start by assessing the culture of your workplace. If your company has a supportive environment, disclosing to a trusted HR representative or a supervisor might actually relieve some of the pressure you're feeling. If you're not ready to reveal the full story, it's perfectly okay to keep it vague. You could simply say you're managing some personal health challenges. Just remember: your mental health is a priority, and you have the right to protect yourself in any way that feels comfortable.

Dr. Kristin Neff, a leading researcher in self-compassion, emphasizes that “setting healthy boundaries and speaking up for your needs is not selfish, it's self-care.” By approaching these conversations with honesty and self-respect, you might find more understanding and support than you anticipated.

Tip 1: Seek Help for Mental Health Challenges

After a suicide attempt, seeking professional help can feel intimidating. But it's one of the most important steps you can take toward healing. You don't have to navigate these heavy feelings on your own. Therapists, counselors, and psychiatrists are trained to provide guidance and support, especially during times of crisis. Even if you've been disappointed by therapy in the past, consider trying again—sometimes it takes a few attempts to find the right fit.

Don't hesitate to explore different forms of therapy, like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), which focuses on changing harmful thought patterns, or Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), which emphasizes mindfulness and emotional regulation. Medication can also be a lifeline for some, providing the stability needed to focus on healing. Remember, seeking help doesn't make you weak—it makes you brave enough to fight for yourself.

We often think we have to be completely self-reliant, but the reality is that none of us are meant to face life's hardest challenges alone. Opening up to a mental health professional can be the first step toward regaining control over your life.

Tip 2: Recognize and Avoid Triggers

One of the most effective ways to prevent future suicide attempts is to become aware of your triggers. Everyone has them—specific situations, places, or even people that can intensify feelings of despair. Learning to identify these triggers takes time, but it can make all the difference in managing your mental health.

Start by paying attention to patterns. Do feelings of hopelessness tend to creep up when you're alone? Maybe scrolling through social media leaves you feeling drained and inadequate. Whatever your triggers are, acknowledging them is the first step toward taking control. Journaling can be an effective way to pinpoint patterns. Write down your thoughts, emotions, and what was happening around you during tough moments.

Once you recognize your triggers, work on strategies to avoid or mitigate them. This might mean limiting time on social media, avoiding certain places, or setting boundaries with people who drain your energy. Being proactive about protecting your mental well-being can help you feel empowered rather than defeated.

Tip 3: Cultivate Reasons to Live

Finding reasons to live might feel like a tall order when you're grappling with the aftermath of a suicide attempt. But even small things can serve as powerful anchors. For some, it's reconnecting with a childhood passion—like painting, writing, or playing an instrument. For others, it might be the simple joy of watching the sunrise with a cup of coffee. These small moments can be reminders that life, despite its challenges, has moments of beauty and meaning.

In Viktor Frankl's renowned book Man's Search for Meaning, he writes, “Those who have a 'why' to live can bear almost any 'how'.” It's not about pretending everything is okay; it's about finding one small thing that makes you want to stay. This could be your pet, a friend who's stood by you, or even the curiosity to see where life takes you next.

Consider making a list of reasons to stay. Write down anything that brings even a glimmer of hope or joy. Revisit this list on dark days as a reminder that there are still parts of this world that need you in it. Healing is not about erasing the past but about finding the strength to keep moving forward, one day at a time.

Tip 4: Commit to Self-Care Practices

Self-care might sound like a cliché, but after a suicide attempt, it's more than just a trendy phrase—it's a necessity. Your mind and body have been through an intense ordeal, and now, they need nurturing. Self-care can look different for everyone, so find what truly soothes you. Maybe it's curling up with a good book, taking a long walk in nature, or simply sitting quietly with your thoughts over a cup of herbal tea.

Don't underestimate the power of small, consistent acts of kindness toward yourself. Sleep, for example, can do wonders. Prioritizing rest is not a luxury—it's foundational for your mental health. Studies show that lack of sleep exacerbates depressive symptoms, which can increase the risk of suicidal ideation. Similarly, nourishing your body with healthy foods and staying hydrated can make a significant impact on your overall mood.

Mindfulness practices like meditation or yoga can also help ground you, especially when your thoughts spiral into negativity. Even just a few minutes of deep breathing can shift your mental state. The key is to be gentle with yourself. Self-care isn't about achieving perfection; it's about giving yourself permission to heal in whatever way feels right for you. Remember: healing is not linear. Some days will be better than others, and that's okay.

Tip 5: Build a Suicide Safety Plan

A safety plan is a practical tool to help you navigate moments of crisis. It's a step-by-step guide that you can turn to when your mind feels overwhelmed with dark thoughts. Think of it as a lifeline—a way to pull yourself out of the depths when you feel like you're sinking. Creating a safety plan doesn't mean you're admitting defeat; it means you're preparing to fight back, even on your toughest days.

Your safety plan should include a list of trusted contacts you can reach out to, whether it's a friend, a therapist, or a hotline. Write down coping strategies that work for you—like taking a walk, listening to your favorite music, or practicing grounding exercises. Include reminders of what you're living for, such as photos of loved ones or notes about your dreams for the future.

Make this plan easily accessible, either in a notebook you carry or on your phone. When the storm hits, having these resources at your fingertips can mean the difference between despair and hope. You're not alone in this fight, and a safety plan is one way to remind yourself of that fact when the darkness feels too heavy.

How to Support Someone After a Suicide Attempt

If someone you care about has survived a suicide attempt, it's normal to feel scared, confused, and unsure of how to help. You might even be afraid to say the wrong thing, but the most important thing is to show up. Simply being there, listening without judgment, and offering a compassionate presence can make a world of difference. They don't need you to have all the answers; they just need to know you care.

When supporting someone who's struggling, avoid platitudes like “it will get better” or “just think positive.” These can come off as dismissive, even if well-intentioned. Instead, acknowledge their pain and let them know it's okay to feel how they feel. According to The Gift of Therapy by Irvin D. Yalom, “creating a safe space where someone feels truly seen and heard can be incredibly healing.” Often, it's not about fixing things but about sitting in the discomfort together.

Encourage them to seek professional help, but be mindful of how you suggest it. Offer to help them find resources or accompany them to appointments if they're comfortable with it. Sometimes, knowing that someone will stand by them through this journey can be enough to spark a glimmer of hope. Remember, recovery takes time, and being patient with their process is one of the greatest gifts you can offer.

Recommended Resources

If you or someone you know is struggling after a suicide attempt, these resources may offer deeper insight and support:

• Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide by Kay Redfield Jamison – A compassionate exploration of the complexities of suicide and survival.
• Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl – A profound look at finding purpose and hope in the darkest of times.
• The Gift of Therapy: An Open Letter to a New Generation of Therapists and Their Patients by Irvin D. Yalom – A treasure trove of wisdom on the power of connection in healing.