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  • Paula Thompson
    Paula Thompson

    Mourning a Loss Unexpectedly: What to Do When Rattled By Friend's Death

    Losing someone suddenly can be one of the most difficult things in life and accepting unexpected death of a friend is no easy task. When faced with such heartbreaking circumstances, it can feel like finding solace or even understanding how to access it is just out of reach. The shock and confusion may leave us feeling immobilized and unable to move forward. In this article, we will explore what steps one can take in order to cope with the loss and the pain that comes along with it.

    It is impossible to put into words the true magnitude of what grieving for a loved one feels like. It is a heart-wrenching experience, that is different from person to person. We all have our own way of dealing with difficult and overwhelming situations such as these. No two people will ever feel exactly the same emotions when going through something like this but there are healthy ways we can cope with the agonizing pain that comes with loss.

    The first and most important thing to remember is to allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come up without judgement and without rushing your healing process. Allowing yourself the time, space and patience you need during the mourning period to think, reflect and heal is vital. Some days you may feel strong enough to get out of bed, while other days you may find yourself curled up into a ball crying in agony. Allowing yourself time, whether it be hours or weeks, months or years, to go through each wave of emotion is necessary in order to truly move forward.

    Another important part of coping with your grief is to express your feelings in whatever way feels comfortable for you. Expressing oneself can take many forms; journaling, speaking to either family members or close friends about your most treasured memories with your lost loved one, writing letters (even if they are never sent), talking to a therapist or professional who specializes in grief management and relaxation exercises such as yoga and mediation are great outlets for expression. It may take time for the emotions to manifest but eventually your words will flow freely as you recall cherished memories and moments.

    Furthermore, connecting with others who are also mourning a loss can facilitate coping. At times, it can feel isolating if everyone around you appears happier than yourself but being with others who deeply understand what you're experiencing can be really beneficial. Sharing stories and experiences together can allow both participants a level of comfort that allows them to accept their own story without feeling judged or misunderstood. If it feels right, reaching out to those close to you in conversation can do wonders for anyone's mental well-being.

    Engaging in activities that bring joy can greatly benefit you emotionally. Whether that be filling up a photo album full of your friend's favourite pictures for nostalgic walks down memory lane or simply taking time for yourself by going on a hike with your pet dog - anything that celebrates life as opposed to solely focusing on death may be just what's needed to bring peace of mind. Reframing how you view life after the death of someone close carries its own challenges, but if done properly it can truly make all the difference over time.

    No matter how one chooses to cope with their individual grief whether it be through conversation or solo reflection - change is never easy and mourning someone's unexpected death is an especially difficult journey for anyone to walk alone. By allowing yourself time and patience as you search for an understanding of the pain that accompanies such agony, combined with engaging in activities that bring joy - breaks through unexpected death do not have to become necessary realities we all inevitably have to face alone.

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