What Should I Do When My Crush Doesn't Feel the Same About Me?

Dear eNotAlone: I don't understand why my crush doesn't feel the same about me. We had been chatting for a few months, and I felt like we were getting close; we clicked in every way and shared a special connection. So when she told me she only wanted to be friends, it completely broke my heart. I had all these expectations and now I'm so crushed and disappointed. Part of me wants to move on and forget about her, but another part of me still deep down believes that there's something special between us. I don't know how to handle this situation – what should I do?

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The pain of a broken heart is real and it can feel overwhelming. But in order to move past the disappointment and heartbreak, it's important to recognize the situation for what it is – your crush simply doesn't feel the same way about you. This may sting and the enormity of it all can be incredibly difficult. However, it is essential to not get caught up in expectations that have become unrealistic.

As difficult as it may be, it will help to accept the reality of the situation and acknowledge the fact that unintentionally, you may have invested more effort and emotion than your crush was comfortable with or ready for. It can be hard to know when and where to draw the line and be readily open with someone in a new connection. Regardless, it is important to be gentle with yourself and recognize that there is still potential for understanding and growth.

Moving on from the reality of this situation may start with reaching out to a supportive group of friends or family to express your feelings. While relying solely on them for support is not recommended, building a strong support system can actually make it easier for you to reflect on and process the emotions you are feeling in a productive and healthy manner.

In addition, this can be an opportunity for self-reflection. Taking the time to assess how you handled the situation and what you could do differently next time can help you build better relationships and can potentially provide more closure for this one. Take it slow, stay patient and practice self-care. The amount of time it takes to move forward can vary, but it will happen eventually. You may not see it or feel it right now, but future positive experiences and connections are ahead.