The Masquerade Ball: Exploring the Art of Dating

Trying to make sense of the dating world can often seem like a masquerade ball. With everyone wearing hidden masks, conversations and expectations are rarely put out into the open. While it can be tricky to attempt forming authentic connections without knowing each other's face, there are a few tricks you can use that can help you decipher what the person opposite could be looking for.

The art of dating requires a certain level of communication finesse if you want to get past the shallow end. Whether we like it or not, meeting someone new is as much about finding someone you trust and conversely, someone who trusts you too. This can start from the smallest hint of a turn of phrase in their dialogue to a certain posture - anything that demonstrates that the hidden mask could be taken off and safety could be created.

Symbolism is key to understand people’s underlying messages. Pay attention not only to what is being said, but think about what isn’t being said too. Being aware of the language between the lines will tell much more than what was uttered out loud. When someone’s statement is purposefully vague, try to look deeper. Irony is a common occurrence amongst those of us who enjoy playing mind-games with potential partners as a way of testing other’s patience. However, don't be fooled by these pretend boundaries they put up as they can be deconstructed by making moral statements and echoing their statements back to them with an informative inflection.

It is sometimes helpful to make a mental ‘suitcase’ to store away the information you find on your journey. True understanding of a person does not come easy and too often, we are seduced by some disingenuous facts about a person’s life. Being aware of when someone's data suite has been filled up with false flased promises or untruths allows one to rework the image you have of them and arrive at a more grounded and realistic conclusion.

Beneath any mask could be a treasure trove of stories - stories about the questions we can ask in order to build up a foundation of trust because a relationship needs to be based upon a strong emotional support structure or else, it will not withstand the test of time. In order to build such a structure, we must first forge a connection via thoughts, feelings and emotions. Take the time to do so and you shall reap the rewards of a happy and fulfilling relationship in the near future.

So, if you want to cut through and reach out beyond the darkness of uncertainty, try to let go of any preconceived notions and take the time to explore the other person, layer by beautiful layer. Present your own stories with all the wonder and passion they bring, before finally finding someone you can really connect with and express yourself wholeheartedly.