How Can I Make Her Feel Like I'm the One She Truly Wants?

Dear eNotAlone: I don't know what to do. My girlfriend loves me, she tells me that all the time but she has an emotional attraction to another guy. He's an old friend, but she won't tell me more than that. I can tell their relationship is more than just friends and it's driving me crazy. I'm constantly questioning her loyalty to me and it's driving me insane. I've asked her multiple times to choose me over him, but she never does. How can I make her feel like I'm the one she truly wants?

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When you find yourself in this situation with your girlfriend, it's important to remember that it's not just about the guy she likes—it's about her. Take time to get to the root of her feelings and what attracted her to him in the first place.

Sometimes, relationships can be confusing and complicated. But they don't have to be. Reflect on what your relationship needs in order to retain its strength and intensity. Ask yourself: "What can I do to make her feel special again?"

Whether it's holding her close, directly expressing your love to her, or going out of your way to make sure she knows how much you care—actions speak louder than words. Show her that you love and support her through both gesture and deeds. Showing your intent can go a long way in creating a bond that's strong and immune to outside forces.

It's okay to talk to her about her other attachments too. Engage her in dialogue with genuine compassion and understanding. Listen openly and non-judgmentally as she expresses her feelings. This may help her better understand what attractions she has for this guy and why. Understanding her motivations can help dispel any anxieties or insecurities that stem from her other attachments.

Remind yourself of who you are and why the two of you started your relationship in the first place. Speak with conviction and focus on the future. Show her that, whatever doubts she may have, you'll there for her and ready to overcome any challenge together. Don't forget, love is a journey of two paths—and yours is one, not two.