Breaking Up: What Is The Best Way To Make It Official?

It's one of the most difficult conversations to embark upon, but when it comes to ending a relationship, it pays to make it official. Breaking up and ending a relationship can be emotionally draining and incredibly hard to get through, but formally creating a wall between the two of you is an important step that needs to be taken to help each party start to heal.

The way in which you break up with someone will say a lot about your attitude, values, and respect for the other person. Even if you don't feel those things anymore, at least put on a brave face and try to show the other person some respect.

First things first, when you plan for the conversation: choose a time and place that allows for privacy. This is an intimate conversation, so having it in public risks potentially embarrassing one or both of you in front of strangers―and no-one wants that. Choose a spot that allows natural light, like a park or cafe, as this will make you both feel safer and more relaxed. Clarity is also important―this is the time to express yourself clearly, so practice what you want to say prior to the actual conversation by writing it all down. Focus on getting your points across without raising voices and arguments.

Be mindful of what kind of language you use. Avoid phrases like “we’re done,” “it’s over,” and “I’m leaving you” as they come off too harsh, even if they’re accurate. Also avoid blaming one another as it may only raise unnecessary arguments. do not forget to address subjects like financial and living arrangements, children custody, etc.

When you sit with the other person and start the conversation, focus on expressing your true feelings and thoughts. Understand that this is an emotional moment for both of you, and it can be hard to be completely objective, but try your best to leave your feelings aside in order to have a constructive conversation. By doing this, you will both have a greater chance of understanding the reason for the break-up and be able to minimize chances of nasty arguments.

Once the conversation is done, give yourselves some time to reflect on the situation. Respectful communication often backfires in those moments, but try to keep calm and maintain the same attitude you used during the whole conversation. If you had a respectful and good conversation, the break-up process will be much healthier. No matter how bad a relationship is, you deserve to end it with respect and that respectful attitude should be present no matter how emotionally involved you were.

Breaking up can be painful and difficult, but that doesn’t mean it has to be a dreaded opportunity. Taking the time to make it “official” can create a smoother transition to the next chapter for both parties.