From Wife to Widow
Six years ago I devised an exercise I called "the widow game" to help Trudy, a woman I had known for several years. Trudy complained that her husband was so unutterably dull that she was considering divorce or, at the very least, taking a
On Grief and Dying: Understanding the Soul's Journey
This is a book for all who grieve, and for all who die. It is also a book for all who live: women and men, widows and widowers, those who have lost a child, a lover, a parent, a grandparent, a pet. It is a book for all who have felt loss, who have lost a
Surviving the Death of a Sibling: Living Through Grief When an Adult Brother or Sister Dies
By now, I've read scores of grief books, and I know that most grieving people experience some form of depression following the death of a sibling, but my experience of depression doesn't seem to fit the mold. Yes, I feel miserable and desolate sometimes,
Is There A Way To Mend A Broken Heart?
Having a broken heart can be really dangerous for health, and in fact, it can lead to a deadly outcome, report U.S. scientists who found why some individuals do suffer from the condition.
The Tao and the Dow - Reflections on the First Years of Widowhood
There is a beautiful book, The Hours, by Michael Cunningham, that won the Pulitzer Prize. It was inspired by Virginia Woolf's Mrs. Dalloway, and until I had seen the new video with Vanessa Redgrave, the book was confusing to me. But once I was oriented ab
The Empty Room: Understanding Sibling Loss
My parents made this easy. It was they who had set the shroud of silence on the subject of my brother. They never talked about what had happened. And they would talk about Ted only on rare occasions, when I was alone with one of them. None of us brought u
Understanding Your Grief
The Grieving Teen: A Guide for Teenagers and Their Friends
If you are grieving a terrible loss, you may be wondering what's happening to you. You may be in a kind of daze, lost in your sorrow and not knowing what tomorrow will bring. You may feel that you are losing your mind.
Answers When a Child Dies
It's not that we blame God for the death of our children, exactly. Its more that we blame God for His refusal to answer our questions about their deaths, questions that haunt us from the moment the child dies and continue to do so through all our subseque
The Dying Process
The individual who is dying is in a state of transition between the living and the dead. Being in the stage of life known as 'dying' has ramifications for both the individual and the larger society. In studying the dying process, we will focus on both the
The Inner World of Grief Your Loss
An unimaginable, indescribable loss has taken place. It has inflicted a wound so deep that numbness and excruciating pain are the material of which it is made. Everyone experiences many losses throughout life, but the death of a loved one is unmatched for
A Story of Love, Death, Grief and the Afterlife
I'm sitting here trying to picture Jim Beaman, to conjure up his physical presence, tune him into memory like an image on a TV screen. I can almost but not quite see him. What I get is vague, hazy. Some dial needs to be turned to bring the picture into fo
Bearing the Burden - Families in Distress
Even families with the best intentions and the greatest resources find themselves exhausted trying to tend to the rigorous needs of the dying. They need help in making good medical or care decisions, they need help interacting with physicians and sorting
Mother: The Call to Connection
Death does not end a relationship. Spiritually or psychologically, a thread remains, stretching from this world to the next. Through this connection, we feel the pull to understand our deceased mothers, to put into context not only their lives but ours. T
The Five Stages of Forgiveness
As described in the introduction, forgiveness is a process, not an event. The very fact that it's a process is what makes it so worthwhile: It forces us to honestly confront feelings that are clogging up our emotional systems and work through them.
Grief - Denial
I stand with my arms at my sides and watch as she fills the bag with Ethan's coats. Oh! The suede jacket with the lamb's-wool lining that we dubbed the Marlboro Man coat. She tucks the arms inside the suitcase carefully, as though she's making hospital co