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About Me

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  1. I'm trying to make sense of it all I see the whole play finally I understand why I wasn't a concern 4 years is all time to hide a bond I remember wen I stayed in the alley n came in you 2 was in the bathroom of my apartment... I just wonder what was wrong with me that question will never go away, n as much as you would never believe a word I said it was drummed I'm ur head how ***Y I was till it stuck thing is I have ever had a relationship with my sister ever never hung around didn't n don't know her today I don't even know why she moved in on you n destroyed something that I can never look forward to no friendship love no affection I thought there would be a rainbow wen we finally got clean she cheated me out of this!!!! I don't love her I havent proceed anything but I know if I don't I won't make it half a year fighting the depression...I've decided to air everything out its the only way i think I might be able to cope I'm hoping for karmic reaction from God I want to wake up n forget you ever existed so I can heal
  2. When you are in a committed relationship, it can be devastating when your partner is unfaithful. You may have gone through all the stages of emotions from anger and betrayal to hurt and sadness. It is hard to believe that someone you thought you could depend on and trust decided to deceive you. While it isn’t easy to forgive a partner who is cheating, you can start to pick up the pieces and move on by understanding why your partner chose to cheat and find ways to cope with the betrayal. The first step to healing is to talk to your partner openly about why the infidelity occurred and if their behavior will change. If your partner considers your feelings and expresses regret, it might be possible to work on the relationship. You will need to accept that any trust that was there may need to be re-earned, and that your relationship has changed; but it doesn't necessarily mean it’s over. Your partner may not want to change or admit that they have been unfaithful, and that will make it more difficult. It can be hard for your partner to take responsibility for hurting you, so don’t expect them to be immediately remorseful. However, if your partner shows no signs of wanting to work on the relationship, it may be time to let go and move on. Note that you cannot control what your partner does; you can only control your own reactions and emotions. That means accepting that your partner cheated, and the unavoidable pain and sadness it brings. Acknowledge the hurt and sadness you feel when your mind wanders to the time your partner was unfaithful. Don’t push those feelings away or try to “fix” them. Instead, allow yourself to sit in the discomfort they bring and let yourself experience the emotions that come with it. It can be helpful to talk to a counselor or therapist to get emotional support during this challenging time. Talking to someone else can offer impartial support, help you sort out your feelings, and provide helpful strategies for dealing with the situation. You should also reach out to family and friends who you trust and can rely on. Being cheated on is something nobody wants to experience, but you can turn the situation into an opportunity to grow emotionally. Forgive your partner if you still choose to be with them, and also forgive yourself. Acknowledge that you are a victim in this situation, and give yourself permission to learn from the heartache, hurt and sadness it caused. Emotional pain can be used constructively to build your strength, resilience, and empathy.
  3. Each day, a million people wake up to the realization that love hurts. Every person deals with their emotions differently - some hide away in their homes, while others stay out of sight and try to ignore the pain. But those addicted to the idea of love won’t give up the chase and wind up constantly pursuing an unfulfilling love. While it may seem difficult, it is necessary to understand how to cope with these feelings even when they are at their strongest. The notion of an unrequited love is almost unbearable and many will feel tempted to bury their head in the sand, avoiding reality altogether. While this tactic might offer temporary relief, it is the wrong approach for anyone who has been hurt so desperately. It is instead important to address the pain, no matter how tough, and push through it. More importantly, it is beneficial to focus on the positive thoughts. Thinking about the great moments spent together, as well as all the things one learned from the experience can be emotionally rewarding. Often, the deepest wounds take even longer to heal. Accepting that one is not to blame for being hurt is vital. It can be easy for those suffering to become consumed by self-loathing, but this will only damage one’s outlook further and hinder the healing process. Harnessing inner strength and coming to the realization that everything happened for a reason is paramount. It might not be immediately clear why one had to experience the pain, but down the line, one should be able to find some clarity. If heartache takes over, reaching out is the best course of action. This doesn’t need to involve talking to someone from the past - friends, family and even professional counselors can be supportive enough. What is essential is that one has access to a judgment-free environment where genuine emotion can be discussed and shared. Everyone has their own story and everyone is entitled to feel whatever they feel. Seeking professional counseling might be necessary too. Not only will it equip victims of heartache with the necessary tools to move on, but it also can otherwise help them understand themselves better. Rationalizing the situation can be hard, so it helps to talk to someone already experienced in such matters. Such conversations can take one’s mind off romantic feelings and instead focus on self-development and learning more about one’s fears, desires, and spiritual growth. Even though love hurts, it is perfect to savor the good memories that were made and to allow the pain to transform into something positive. Finding distraction can be effective as well. Pursuing hobbies, going on trips and meeting new people can all help in creating a healthier perspective. It won't immediately fix the problem, but it can bring a sense of clarity which could prove fruitful. Regardless of how much pain is felt, it is possible to heal and move forward - even when the hurt feels insurmountable. Remembering the tips outlined above will ease the journey and make it more bearable. It's very normal to feel vulnerable and exposed, but eventually the suffering will subside.
  4. Picture the sun breaking through a fog layered mountain range. That’s how you can feel anytime you suffer hurt or pain. No doubt it can be hard to imagine that moment when something so oppressive as hurt can ever depart you. But it will pass and, just as the rays of sunshine break through the fog in the mountains, so too can great joy present itself in your life and help you start a new journey of personal rediscovery. Understanding how you can use the difficult time and turn it around for good is essential for you to move through the pain. You can choose to accept what has happened, allowing the hurt to release itself from your heart, or you can cling on to the hurt, remaining trapped in a perpetual loop of negative thoughts and emotion. If you choose to be surrendered to the flow of life, although it sometimes includes pain and hurt, you can significantly decrease your suffering. It could also be helpful to remember that everyone deals with this sometimes paralyzing feeling. Hurt is universal and normal. Just as the wind blows through the mountains, moments of trauma come and go in every life. So don't be ashamed of how you are feeling. It is normal to experience anger, sadness and regret during difficult times; yet do focus on the positives you can identify. Sometimes the life lesson comes in imperceptible shapes and sizes, yet when you give yourself permission to search deep down in your soul, you can find real self-understanding and expand in ways unimaginable. The pain can eventually become the purpose you seek, creating an essence of growth and hope. That said, it is key to recognize that you are always in control of your destiny. Restricted by nothing more than your own beliefs, you have the power to decide how your hurt evolves. Instead of seeing it as a burdensome difficulty that you face, you can recognize the opportunity for you to expand your sense of self and develop an even greater level of resilience and kindness. The first step in this process can be the learning. Through examining the situation that caused the pain, acknowledging any actual wrongs and pain caused, accepting responsibility for takeaways, and restoring right relationships to the best of your abilities, you can learn a great deal about yourself and ensure future growth. There are tangible benefits to be gleaned. Once the initial emotions start to abate, actively make a choice to love and forgive yourself above all else. Refuse to let your suffering define you. Take inventory of who you are and what makes you unique and special. Take time for yourself and enjoy activities that bring you a sense of satisfaction and pause. These could include anything from a long walk on the beach to watching your favorite movie. Increased self-care brings about increased trust and potential for handling future hurt. Remember, a brand new journey begins at the moment hurt leaves you. Creations lies beyond the walls of pain, filled with learnings and potential for you to upgrade your entire existence. Grow from the ashes of grief and receive this as a gift -- one that will deeply transform you and allow you to stand more firmly and confidently in your truth. You can choose joy and life’s offerings, every single day. Once hurt departs, you can dive deep into the blissful commotions that only life can lend you, reconnecting with the truth of your being, gathering strength and wisdom en route. This can provide more insight, giving you comfort and clarity at each turn. Breaking through the pain and tight grip of hurt is possible, containing within it a journey of affirmation, hope and inner peace. Feeling joy, awakening a self-discovery journey, understanding your true strength and overcoming fear reminds us that no matter what we have been through, we can still be encouraged to look upon the beauty of life. Despite the hardships that may occur, joy always awaits.
  5. It is a familiar ache: missing someone near and dear to you. We all know that empty feeling in our gut, like an emptiness that can never be filled. But what happens when that person suddenly isn’t there anymore? What do you do when they are no longer available to talk and share those moments of laughter and joy with? You feel like a part of you is missing, and this loss can lead to an unbearable amount of hurt and grief. It is hard to admit to yourself that you may never see that person again, despite how accepting you may want to be. Your heart may break, and it can be hard to carry on even the most basic tasks. There may not be any one single approach to cope with this magnitude of grief, but there are ways to manage it and make the journey just a little bit easier. One way to start the process is to accept that the pain you are feeling is real. Acknowledge it and allow yourself to take the time you need to grieve. This may manifest as tears, talking, writing, or whatever form of emotional expression you need. Do not feel guilty about taking time for yourself if it is needed. Another hint is to lean on your support system. Talk to your friends and family who have been in similar situations. Reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness. Talking and feeling heard by others is a powerful emotion. You could even see a therapist who specializes in grief. To find the right fit, ask for referrals to make sure you find someone who can help you work through your particular grief and feelings. Dedicate some good energy towards activities that bring you happiness or peacefulness. Doing something creative such as painting, crafting, or journaling can provide relief. Try gardening, walking around your neighborhood, or reading a book. You could also look into volunteer opportunities or join a meetup group to get your mind off of the sadness. Doing something kind for someone else often has a positive effect of making us feel less alone. Going through the pain of losing a loved one is never easy and there will certainly be days where it feels impossible to bear. Don’t be too hard on yourself during these times. Grieving takes time. Grieve in a way that works for you and find the courage to keep going even though your heart is hurting.
  6. For many people facing the difficult reality of a partner’s infidelity can be a confusing and traumatizing experience. It is normal to feel a sense of hurt and betrayal when discovering that your loved one has been unfaithful with another person, particularly if the affair was with a close friend. The swirling emotions experienced can make it difficult to know the best course of action for how to proceed with the relationship. No matter how lost you feel or how much uncertainty surrounds the situation, there are some important steps you should take as soon as possible. Firstly, if safe, remove yourself from the environment where you discovered the infidelity. Many people feel so overwhelmed with the immense emotions unleashed by such news, they find themselves incapable of thinking objectively or making any meaningful decisions. Create a safe space for yourself, whether this means staying with a relative or going for a walk in a nearby park. This way, you can get a much-needed break from the situation. Furthermore, seek out professional help. It is vital that you properly process this traumatic event in your life. Having someone knowledgeable to help you navigate these complicated emotions can be immensely beneficial and help you to eventually move on. Consider attending both individual and couples counseling sessions. Joint therapy will help you to work together to create an agreement on whether continuing the relationship is the right choice. Whereas individual counseling will help you to examine any personal issues related to the betrayal which may have intensified the situations effects - enabling you to gain clarity over what you need to move forward with your life. In addition to seeking professional help, practice self-care and listen to your intuition. Read inspirational books, meditate, go for long walks - anything that helps you to cultivate inner peace. Furthermore, listen to your body. When faced with moments of emotional and mental exhaustion, take regular breaks to rest and restore your energy and emotional wellbeing. In moments like this, it is important to be gentle and patient with ourselves. Finally, do not provide an immediate answer on how to move forward with your relationship. Allow yourself plenty of time before jumping into any decision-making. The shock of this situation means that whatever resolution is made must come from a place of long-term thought, rather than short-term emotion. Situations like this are inevitably complex. it is up to you and your partner to identify what is best in the long run. When faced with the devastating discovery of a partner’s infidelity there are several important steps to take. It is okay to feel lost and confused, but by taking action such as finding a safe space, seeking professional help, and listening to your intuition, you can begin to work towards accepting the situation and taking steps towards understanding what direction is best for your future.
  7. No one likes to feel rejected, especially by someone they care deeply about. If your significant other, family member, or friend constantly hangs up on you, it can be extremely damaging to your self-esteem and your relationship. When you experience this situation, it’s not only difficult to move past it, but it could also signify a much deeper issue that needs to be addressed. The first step is to understand the reasons why the person might be hanging up on you in the first place. It could be anything from them feeling overwhelmed and needing their own space, to a more serious issue such as deep-rooted trust issues. Without knowing why it's happening, it can be hard to address the root problem. Additionally, it is important to consider if there are any negative patterns or behaviors in the conversation that may be contributing to the behavior. If the person's behavior is caused by frustration, there are several things you can do to help. One possible approach is to communicate openly and ask your partner how they are feeling, and what they need in order to feel better. It is important to be patient and understanding, and to avoid passing judgement or blaming them for the way they feel. Additionally, it may be helpful to agree to take breaks during conversations if necessary. This can provide a space for both of you to take a breather and come back to the conversation when you're both ready. Another approach is to find ways to empathize with the other person and show understanding, and to practice active listening. Listen without reacting to what is said, and without attempting to fix their problems. It is also important to be mindful of your body language, facial expressions and tone of voice, as these can all have an effect on how the other person perceives your words. It is natural to feel hurt and confused when someone hangs up on you, no matter the circumstance. But it is crucial to remember that you can’t control how the other person behaves, but you can control how you respond. Taking the time to reflect on how you feel and how you want to respond can be beneficial in terms of accepting the situation and finding ways to move on. Taking care of yourself is also essential. If the person's behavior has caused you to feel down, seek out emotional support from friends and family. Give yourself permission to take time off to focus on yourself and your wellbeing. You may want to train yourself to engage in positive self-talk, and try to replace the negative thoughts with positive ones. It may also be helpful to practice various mindful activities, such as mindfulness meditation, yoga, and journaling, to recenter yourself and process your emotions. Although it can be difficult to cope with a loved one hanging up on you, taking the time to reflect on the underlying issues and finding ways to care for yourself can be beneficial in being able to move forward in the relationship. Learning effective communication techniques and being open to understanding the other person's perspective can be key in creating meaningful conversations that can eventually lead to a more fulfilling relationship.
  8. I, F (21) was dating this M (30) , but he broke things off with me because he said he thought the age difference would cause problems. We are currently fwb. Yesterday I spent the night at his place and he dropped me off at home the following morning. As we were in the car he told me this “funny story” (which supposedly happened 2 days ago) about a girl approaching him and telling him he was exactly the guy she was looking for and that she wanted to date him. He said he thought she was pretty and that he had never been approached by a girl before. But, it turned out she was only 19, and he said he thought she was too young,but that if he were younger he would date her. I know we are only fwb, so I shouldn’t care, but I still didn’t like hearing this at all and I don’t understand why he would tell me this.
  9. Looking for advice but also needing to vent and let out some of the hurt. My bf and I are going on 3 years together, we're both 30. We haven't been truly intimate in almost a year. I'm open with him about how it hurts me and how I don't feel like he's still attracted to me even though he says he is. I try to initiate intimacy but it gets met with changing the subject, moving away from me, putting focus on something in the room like the TV or the dog, making jokes. I've lost track of how many times we've fought over it and I end up depressed, feeling worse while he makes empty promises that he'll make an effort to try more. But he never does. Then yesterday he told me he has a p**n addiction and he thinks it's easier to handle himself that way than to actually involve me in it. Ouch. I don't have an issue with him watching it, hell, I watch it, but my heart hurts that he would rather do that than to make an effort with me. And he didn't seem bothered to tell me. (I'd also like to point out that during past intimate moments I'm very involved so it's not like I'm asking for an arm or a leg). He tells me often that I'm his soul mate and he would do anything for me but this issue is still so prevalent and no action actually gets taken to work on it. It's like all the effort that gets put into avoiding it could be put into actually working on it...ugh. I hate to admit it but I consider cheating on him a lot, but I know that I just want the feeling of being wanted by someone and it wouldn't be anything of substance... but I really want that feeling again... Idk I feel like I'm losing it and wanting to throw in the towel. Intimacy isn't everything in a relationship and I understand that but it's one of the ways I enjoy connecting with my partner and I thought he did too and it wasn't an issue before. I know addiction isn't personal but I can't help but feel self conscious... is it my body? My hair? Do I smell bad? Is my conversation a turn off? Really does have me looking in the mirror different... thanks cardi. Any advice for this hurting person? Anyone been through something similar? 💔😔
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