Has anyone had this problem before- loss of attraction

I have posted numerous threads on my situation before but I was wondering if anyone has had this problem before. I recently saw my ex after 4 weeks broken up and the problem behind all this was she lost her affection for me. She wasnt into me anymore and had lost any sense of intimacy she had for me. She never wanted to have sex and lost any sense of attraction for me. This is after being together for 2 and a half years and being in love. This lead my ex to say that she loved me but no longer was in love with me. This had nothing to do with my physical appearance, just something she felt. I wonder if its possible to get someone to find u attractive again and be intimate with you when they havent felt that way for months and have broken up with you because of this loss of chemistry as they call it.

I personally find that physical attraction to your other half comes with the deep love that one would have. Perhaps she has fallen out of love with you. Maybe things got too redundant for her? This can cause somone to feel as if they are no longer "in love". However, they still care for you and hence why they still "love you".

From a physical apperance, my ex was not the poster model type, he is in fact, over weight...but I loved him, every inch of him and still love him today. If your ex was simply turned off by your physical apperance, then I'm sorry to say, I think that is quite low of her. There must be something else that caused her to not be attracted to you anymore.

Think in terms of marriage. It is obvious that apperance deteriorates with age. When you are old and grey, conversation is all you have left!

Take this as a sign. You deserve someone who wants to be with you acne and all!

yeah your right i believe it has to do with the fact that i was so clingy and jealous of her being away from me and at school. This turned her off big time because i wasnt as confident as i used to be. She had been telling me for months before we broke up that she wasnt physically attracted to me and i believe it was because of this behavior of mine. I guess there really is no way to get her attraction to me again because when i saw her 4 weeks later she said the same thing. In her mind I am always going to be that weak and clingy and unconfident person that i had become. She was attracted to the confident, strong, independent person i was the first 2 years we went out not the person i have been the past 1/2 year.

How did you act when you met her last time? Were you very confident and independent? Did you ask her about the relationship? You know, if she still saw that clingy, unconfident person, maybe you still haven't recovered and become independent. I think that you need to make that change within you and come back as a totally different man, brimming with strength and happiness - even MORE so than you were the two first years you were dating.

I think SomethingFunny is right.

All is not lost.

After 2 and a half years some of the attraction and sexual chemistry between people often wears off and routine sets in.

At least she is honest. Most people probably wouldn't be this honest with the person they are dumping (heck I wouldn't!).

You need to work on yourself and then attract her all over again. But in order to do this you need some emotional distance so that you are not as dependant on what she thinks of you as you are now.

Accept what she is saying and try not to appear needy or desperate. Just walk away and do some stuff on your own for awhile. If you can't think of anything to do on your own then this means that you need to develop in this area so that she can become interested in you again.

My only problem is that I live 2 hours away from her and dont have the chance to run into her. The only chance I have is if she starts calling me again once college is over. Is there any way she can tell that I am different over the phone?? Or that I am that confident person I once was? When I was up there last week I must admit that I talked about the relationship and I wasnt ready to see her. She basically told me flat out that she didnt see things getting better between us and that I should get on with my life. She was stone cold to me and showed no emotion, I just hope that over the summer she starts to miss me and wants to call me and see how things are. I dont know maybe its too far gone. I dont know how she can fall back in love with me again if we dont have the chance to see each other unless she invited me to see her.

Well at least if you don't see her then you will forget her more easily.

Don't call her because she doesn't want to see you right now. She has told you and so you have to respect that.

Wait a few months. Then initiate friendly contact.

I know it is hard but you just have to go through the pain of not seeing her and working on yourself in the mean time.

Just be nice to yourself. Buy yourself some treats.

Give her phone number to a friend so you will NOT be tempted.

Think of "no contact" like giving up drugs. You are addicted right now but once you go through the pain of not seeing her you will get used to life without her.

Yeah you are right......im basically getting to the point now where I am going on with my life and if she enters back into it then fine but if not so be it. I am sick of wondering about the what ifs about the situation and everything else. I kept thinking that maybe when she graduates from college and is removed from the party atmosphere things will sink in and she will realize she misses me but whatever its not in my control and there is no use worrying about it (althouhg i will from time to time). If she makes a move then i will have to see how i feel. I guess i have come to the realization that she fell out of love with me and there really is no way to fall back in love with someone when u never see them. Missing me and thinking about me isnt going to bring those feelings back from her.

I feel for you.

Let her remember you in time as someone special not as someone she had to try hard to get rid of.

It really hurts. I know. Just try to be good to yourself. Things will get better.