I can't seem to let go

I feel so stupid because I can't move on from my ex.

Our relationship wasn't the best from the start, but I stayed with him because I hoped things would get better.

Looking back, I was always the one to put the effort in, and most days I was miserable more than happy.

I used to be very jealous of other peoples relationships as ours was boring (we never went out anywhere we just stayed at his or went for a walk) and he never went round my house as he was 'scared to meet my parents'.

I also knew he wasn't 100% over his ex which made me feel like second best.

I could never trust him either, and that made me become jealous and anxious even over the smallest things.

I'm only 17, and I know in a year or so I'll look back at this post and probably laugh, but I still miss him and care about him a lot. I wish we were able to work out. He was my best friend for 3 years before dating and I hoped things were different.

We haven't spoken since the break up (July 14th), but in a few days I'm going back to school and I'll see him everyday and I don't know how to deal with it, I know he probably will just ignore me, but I'll have the urge to look at him etc and it'll upset me.

I feel so pathetic because I know it wasn't going to work out, I am young and I'll have plenty of other boyfriends in the future, but it still hurts badly and I miss him like crazy. I don't even want to date another guy right now as I feel like it's too soon from my ex and none of them would compare to him.

We used to have a good laugh together, and talk about the future, and he'd tell me funny stories from his past, and he told me he loved me and I miss him. Did he never love me?

Please help?

You are not pathetic darling ..love hurts and that is all there is to it . Seeing him everyday when youget back to school will actually push your healing on ..yes at first your stomach will sink and your heart will pound ..then the next day it will be a little less and so on until in the end I promise you you wont care if you see him at school or not .

You know the reality ..it wasn't a great relationship ever and that will start to come to the forefront of your mind rather than the love and loss you feel as each day passes .

Just tuck this life experience under your belt and move forward knowing this pain wont last forever ..you sound lovely and there is a fab life waiting for you . xx

I just read back your old post and saw that you ended it ..you should be really pleased with yourself for seeing it wasn't working and instead of letting it drag out in the hope he would change you ended it ... well done to you and at 17 you already have a great sense of what is right and wrong .

Don't be so hard on yourself. Breakups hurt no matter what, no matter the circumstances. Yes, even when you are better off without the person still. It takes time to heal and recover and move forward, so give yourself that time to do so. And I'm glad you did end it, that's a giant step in setting a pattern for yourself in which you refuse to settle into bad relationships and at 17 you're already ahead of the game there from some of us. Myself included who didn't leave my first relationship until he hit me, so yes you are actually pretty smart already.

But still it will hurt. Turn to friends and family, get active in a new hobby or two or three, focus on yourself. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others. You will get over him and move on. And like you said one day you'll look back and laugh, but for now just move forward and you'll be fine. Hugs.

We all tend to grieve our ideas of what we hoped things would be with someone rather than the reality of what it really was.

Maybe seeing him again will remind you of how he really was--no prize.

Head high, and good job for dumping him rather than keeping yourself miserable over what he would NOT become.