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Getting my true love back


Lewisjg

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I'm in desperate need here. the love of my life has recently broken up with me due to my own actions. I am going to be completely honest on here, and it was because of my stupid decision to take steroids. Before I took steroids, we where both amazingly happy. Since taking them I have been absolutely paranoid and hormonal which is the side effects of the steroids. The love of my life broke up with me originally back towards the end of May and after a week, she realised she missed me and we got back together. I admitted I came off the steroids and we said that we would work through it. The thing is with them, as soon as you stop it, you need to wait to let them clear out of your system before taking a post cycle which is a hcg to help with your testosterone levels and estrogen levels. I had spent the whole week with her at her house from Tuesday 30th june up until I went to work Tuesday 7th july at 5.30am.. One of the days in the week I got a bit over the top too and we had an argument which resulted in her kicking me out, although she allowed me back in and we managed to try and forget about it. Tuesday 7th may I didn't speak to her for the whole day until she went to bed at 1am the wednesday morning. Where I felt like she was in a mood with me, although this was the paranoia of the steroids. I tried to call her to speak and just make sure she was ok, although it came accross as suffocating. I understand all of this now, I always did but with steroids, you can't control the paranoia, overthinking etc.. I had enough, because all I want is for us both to be happy. So I decided to message her the morning after before she woke upto assure that I was going to start the post cycle today. Although she had decided she had enough. I no she still loves me because you can't switch these off overnight, I understand at the moment she may not want to be with me, due to the way I had been acting the last few months, but I no it's all the steroids.. The paranoia etc has started to fade and I can feel the improvements within myself. But I hope it's not too late. My true love decided to split with me again. I am not going to stop fighting for her as I have done things like come off the steroids for me and us. I love her more than anything in the world, and I don't want this to be it. Can anyone help me with how I can get her back? I'm never going to stop fighting, I have never felt love like this, and I even said I love you to her the first day I met her.. And she did too.. She's my best friend, and I have ruined it all because I was going to do a bodybuilding competition and to look good for her.. But it's truly not worth losing something so precious in your life. Please someone help. She knows it's the steroids, and that I wasn't the same as when we first got together, but she had enough, and now I don't want it to be too late even though I have physically stopped them, and started the post cycle to get my levels all back to the normal state. Is it possible I can get her back? DESPERATE MAN HERE.

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You are going to have to prove to her that you are clean from the steroids and only time will do that for you. She has no reason to believe it, til she can see it in you. Actions speak louder than words. So stay strong, get medical help if you need it to kick the steroids, and vow to yourself to never do that again. Maybe she'll come back, maybe she won't.

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Give her space and time. Get yourself right. Think about why you.started take steroids in the first place. She already loved you so you obviously have some insecurity issues that are affecting your relationship. Get healthy and happy. I suggest no contact with her for at least two weeks. If she messages you then respond and reassure her that you are.getting yourself back together. I know this will be difficult but think of it this way, we women go through massive hormone changes every month and we manage to get through and so can you. After the two weeks message her and let her know how you are doing and how you feel. Getting off steroids is your first priority. If she loves you, and it sounds like she does, she will come back. And here is a little tip....for most women the sexist thing about a man isn't his body, brains, money,or power....its confidence. Confidence is the best aphrodisiac and attention getter there is. So instead of juicing up, man up and get your primitive man going. She will love and respect that. Good luck

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I did the steroids to help me get to a better position for a competition I was looking into doing.. But I ended up not even doing them.. It was peer pressure maybe as I got told a lot of people would have been doing them in the competition. But it's genuinely not worth losing the most amazing thing in my life. I was meant to be meeting her yesterday to try and speak to her although she said that picking up things and dropping off hers is all that would come of the meeting. I ended up messaging saying I'm not ready to meet just yet and said sorry. Her reply to that was 'okay. Let me know when.' And saturday night I knew she had a birthday drink up at her mates house. So me being me and wanting to look after her when she was hungover, I left a macdonalds on her doorstep and drove off and messaged her saying there's something outside for you on your doorstep.. She messaged back saying thank you. I tried to make the conversation with her and after a 3rd question, she said why am I making small talk as this is going to make it more difficult and it's pointless. So I tried to explain that being civil is ok, and she to say that she thinks it means something different to me than her. I said not at all, with her reply being 'if you say so' and at this point I neverreplied because I was stupid to message and should just give her space. Last time she said she got back into contact because she never missed anyone that much before. So I'm hoping I can get that feeling again. I got us both couple rings a few months ago, and I'm hoping that she is still wearing it, I no last time she said she didn't wantto take it off, this time I need to no if she is or not. Thank you for the advice, Anthony else along the way would Be much appreciated, I love this girl more than anything. Because of the steroids it made her think we are not compatible, although it's just the fact they changed me. I'm being completely honest, I am feeling better in myself, but I want to give it more time, I don't no how else to physically prove to her it's got me back to how I was, because I'm not good at this type of thing, break ups before I just brushed them off, got drunk and was fine after a few days. This girl completes me and I can't just physically brush this off. I need to fight for her. Thanks again.

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BB is a tough sport... Cycling is a dangerous slope. I understand the pressure that one has to be big to win and those "Drug free" comps are not really drug free.. just means they stop cycling 6 weeks out before the comp so they can pass the test. I have dated a few FBB in my lifetime so I know the game. Been in that circle altho I am not a lifter myself.

 

Its hard being there for someone who cycles male or female. The changes are drastic and the dangers are bad.. Ive had two friends die recently due to use. One girl had her heart explode, the other died in her sleep.. her heart exploded while she slept.

 

Okay, as for the 'love of your life' there isn't much you can do right now. You have to take care of you first. You were juggling too many things.. in other words.. you were holding on too tight to everything and your GF slipped thru your fingers. Doesn't mean its over, just means its over for now. She wants to see you change, so why don't you make that change, then come back saying its done, say you were humbled, you are sorry for putting her thru that and ask for her forgiveness. But do that only after you are done with you getting off your cycle

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And now I have just checked she has taken off the ring that I got her.. We both wore couple rings, I still have mine on but I've found out she has taken hers off.. Last time she split up with me she kept it on because she said it means something to her and she wasn't ready to take it off... Now she doesn't.. And I feel even more heartbroken now...

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The longer you live in denial the more its going to hurt.. Its over for now.. she has to move on with life, she cant wait around for you.. so she is going to move on.. Now you can sit and mope or you can follow thru what you said you were going to do. The time will do both of you good..Remember that the focus has to be on you and you getting off of the cycle.. not wondering what she is doing..

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  • 3 weeks later...

Well.. It's over.. I'm hoping only for now.. Although met up with her Sunday to collect my things, and drop hers off.. Tried to sort things and explained everything was out of my system and ok... Although with a straight face.. She told me she doesn't love me anymore... Heartbroken to the max as this girl is my true love, best friend and soul mate..

 

Although she wanted me to message her to let her no I got home ok?

 

Also she said she wants to focus on her career, and doesn't want to be involved with anyone... Stupidly she said I wanna make a pact, and if we are both single by the time we are 30, that we get married! Who the hell does that! Please anyone.. Opinions so so heartbroken and nothing is Gettin easier..

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