Break up with him because he didn't contact me on Thanksgiving

I got angry at my boyfriend. He didn't invite me over to his moms house for thanksgiving. We had a fight and he basically refused to talk to me yesterday. He said he is sick of me "blowing up" when things don't go my way. So I'm really upset that he didn't contact me on Thanksgiving. I'm thinking about maybe I should break up with him.

How long have you two been bf/gf? What kinds of things do you "blow up" over?

How old are you two? How long have you been dating ? Do you tend to blow up over small things ?

about 8 months and I am 33. I don't feel like I blow up.

Idk, kind of sounds like you do. Guy I dated forgot to call me on my birthday and I certainly did not react this strongly. I honestly thought you were about 19-20 based on this post.

about 8 months and I am 33. I don't feel like I blow up.

Why is he saying you blow up then? That makes him either intellectually incapable of understanding the term "blowing up," or it makes him a liar.

Ok - so I think you did the right thing. After dating for 8 months, I think it is only natural to start planning holidays together. I don't know if you tried to plan something with him or not, but if you're together for a long period of time, and aren't celebrating these things together without a valid reason, then yes, ending it is probably for the best.

good luck

To add: Not that "blowing up" is the right response, but I think after 8 months, it's reasonable to wonder where this relationship is headed.

Don't break up after 1 fight. 8 months of being loyal to each other over 1 fight.

Not worth it imo.

well, it doesn't sound like it's 1 fight. the boyfriend said he is tired of her blowing up, which maybe sounds like fight after fight after fight? In that case, maybe they aren't a good match?

well, it doesn't sound like it's 1 fight. the boyfriend said he is tired of her blowing up, which maybe sounds like fight after fight after fight? In that case, maybe they aren't a good match?

I agree. If the relationship is toxic. It's not worth it.

he says she lives too far (2 hours away) and he never really sees her so its not a big deal that I haven't gone over there yet. I don't know, I am very sensitive and I don't know if I believe him or not. Maybe I do get upset a lot. I just feel like I don't blow up.

I feel like he is hiding something. He seems like a great guy but he makes it out to be that families shouldn't meet until things are going towards MARRIAGE. I'm like um noooo. marriage is not the only reason you should meet family.

did he spend thanksgiving with her?

I feel like he is hiding something. He seems like a great guy but he makes it out to be that families shouldn't meet until things are going towards MARRIAGE. I'm like um noooo. marriage is not the only reason you should meet family.

So.... basically he's saying he doesn't think things are heading towards marriage with you???

It's been eight months. I once waited a year to meet a bf's mother and he and I were very serious. And if she lives two hours away and he doesn't see her often, I would say he probably wants to spend time with her without the heaviness of a gf there, especially a gf who A. has only been around for eight months, and B. has an anger issue (in his eyes).

You never answered: why do you think he is saying you blow up? Clearly there is a disconnect here if he's saying you do and you're saying you don't.

I can't answer for him why he thinks I blow up if I don't think I do. I honestly don't feel like I blow up. He did go see her and he stayed out there he is still there he says its too far to drive back so he went out there yesterday is still there today and we were supposed to see each other tomorrow but now I'm just like..idk

So.... basically he's saying he doesn't think things are heading towards marriage with you???

I thought he meant like getting engaged but now that you put it like that it makes it worse.

So...you're debating breaking up with him for not calling you...and in the same paragraph say that you don't think you blow up. Blow up is...over reacting. Breaking up with someone because he didn't call...seems a bit of an over reaction? Maybe? It does to me.

I don't think it's a big deal to have not met his mom yet at 8 months...as long as he has integrated you into his life in other ways...like: you've met his friends, you're his date to his Christmas party, he spends at least 2 nights a week with you....that kind of thing. If he's not incorporating you into his life...than yes, your feelings are warranted.

I have met his co workers which he says are his friends really. Ummm...he does come over about 2 times a week but its hard because he lives far from me so he comes as much as he can. I mean its more of the not meeting is mom. I don't know when that will ever happen. I read that it should happen within the first year.

he says she lives too far (2 hours away) and he never really sees her so its not a big deal that I haven't gone over there yet. I don't know' date=' I am very sensitive and I don't know if I believe him or not. Maybe I do get upset a lot. I just feel like I don't blow up.[/quote']

 

I feel like if you are sensitive and suspicious of him, you can't be surprised why he doesn't want you to meet him mom. If he feels like you blow up all the time, I don't think he'll really view you as a woman he would want to commit to long term.

 

Perhaps you should end this relationship; it sounds toxic and not one with a future.

The thing is you can't really invite people over to somebody else's house. Just because he is her son doesn't mean he can invite people to her house.

I read that it should happen within the first year.

I'm not sure that you can base your relationship on something you read. Everyone's relationships are different. Some people have a different dynamic with their parents and don't necessarily take their gf or bf to meet them within a year. And I think that overall if your bf thinks you blow up then you need to listen and think about why he feels that way.

I feel like he is hiding something. He seems like a great guy but he makes it out to be that families shouldn't meet until things are going towards MARRIAGE. I'm like um noooo. marriage is not the only reason you should meet family.

Why is your approach right and his wrong? Different people have different approaches when it comes to when it is appropriate to meet the family. I also can see where someone doesn't want the first time to be on a major holiday that might already be stressful.

but to not even call? I kept calling him and calling him because I wanted to talk so he texted me. I will call you later and he never called ON THANKSGIVING. I'm thinking okay if you care you would call. Now he texts me that he misses me too just a few hours ago. Its confusing.

i can just imagine how you feel based solely on not hearing from him on thanksgiving...it would hurt anyones feelings i would think. but i also think its not worthy of ending a relationship. if he thinks you overreact, and you obviously really like him or you wouldn't be posting here, try to work on letting things go more than you may do currently. or else you are going to push him away sooner rather than later. at least he said he misses you. give him some space...let him reach out to you and dont freak out if its not right away, it will work in your favor to give him some distance i think.