I've grown to hate her

So I started seeing this girl around February of this year and at first everything seemed alright. We enjoyed each other's company, we had passion for each other, we kissing, played around, had great sex, and just had fun being around each other. Over the summer we decided to get a house together and split rent because we were both sick of dirty, inconsiderate roommates and we both wanted a place not just in some crappy apartment (we're college students). So the move in together was more of a way to save frustration and money instead of that relationship leap forward.

Things have changed drastically. Now I can't get her off of me or away from me long enough for me to have some time to myself. I go in another room to read or play guitar and fifteen minutes later she's standing in the doorway staring at me trying to start a conversation about some random crap that I don't care about because I'm trying to have some time to myself. This extends to even going to the store. If I don't feel like going with her to the store then she just won't go like she's physically or mentally incapable of doing so. If I want to go somewhere by myself then she rushes me out the door in a fit and face that easily spells: "well fine I didn't want to go anyway."

A lot of this has to do with the fact that she practically has no friends. She doesn't actively seek out people to hang out with and it's like I'm her only friend and the only person she cares to be around. It's totally suffocating because I can't just have my own friends and go hang out with them without her following me around. She pretty much relies on my friends to be her friends because she judges everyone else that she meets so harshly and always has a reason that she can't be their friend. It's like she's stuck in permanent B-mode and won't lighten up and stop talking trash about EVERY SINGLE PERSON other than me or my friends.

Not to mention she's always in a negative attitude. She talks badly about everyone and everything and she has this "matter of fact" way of speaking about everything as if she's the most intelligent person in the world. Let's not forget that the only things she can hold a conversation about are shakespeare and french. She's like the pretentious hipster without all the stupid clothes, hair and thick glasses. I pretty much have no interest in what she's talking about half the time because I can't relate since I'm more into science and music. She also says plenty of things that are misleading "facts" and repeats myths as if they were truths but if I go to correct her then she throws fits.

The fits...any time she gets upset about something that I've said (usually something trivial like correcting her wive's tales, or that I want the fan on because I'm hot but she's cold) she throws this moody fit and holes up in the bedroom for at least 30-45 minutes. She doesn't deal with any of her emotions like an adult. She's told me that she has anxiety and depression (which is very apparent) but she pretty much refuses to get any kind of treatment. As a psychology major myself, I'm well aware of the success rates of various therapies and medications, but instead she'd rather just suffer through it and self medicate with excessive amounts of marijuana. She's gone to therapy before, but apparently it "makes her feel crazy" even though I've reassured her that it doesn't make her crazy to want to fix her problems.

In conclusion, I'm done with all of it. I can't take her attitudes and negativity and fits anymore. I can't stand the way she relies on me for her only social support and constantly badgers me when I want alone time. Technically I can move out whenever I want because only she signed the lease, but I'd feel like a huge tool if I just left her to pay the other half of the rent. I need some advice here because ever since we moved in together I've felt terrible and drained and like I'm being suffocated by her always needing me around since she cant make her own friends.

Sub-let the place.

Ouch. I think you just need to tell her that you think this situation is not working out anymore. Offer to give her your half of your rent for 3 months, so she has time to find a new roommate (when is the lease up?) Did you two have any kind of verbal agreement?

Then try to find a nice studio so you have all the quiet you need!

Have you ever talked to her about what bothers you? Or have you just silently been building up resentment towards her?

I've talked to her about a few of these issues, but to be honest she seems to not handle her emotions very well and would likely throw a huge fit or become severely depressed and I don't want to be around for that. I just feel like I need to leave and not be able to be around for her to give me any kind of emotional abuse which seems highly likely.

I've also talked to her about how she never wants to go anywhere...she's a netflix addict and pretty much only leaves the house for school and to get things from the store. She seems perfectly content with living in this isolated little world of hers and it seems like she just wants me there as her hermit-esque companion which I'm not into at all.

Have you sat her down and told her straight up everything that is upsetting you and that if things don't change you need to leave her life? If you haven't then its sort of unfair to her to just pick up and go without addressing the actual issues. That said, if your mind is made up and you don't "want" to work things out with her than I would be the first one to tell you that its time to move on.

You hate her? Then why the bloody heck don't you just break up with her???? I swear, I do not get when people do the whole, "Oh I hate them, but I'm still seeing them." It's like watching someone slam their hand in a door over and over and over again, all the while saying how much it hurts, and yet they just keep on doing it.

Seriously, just walk away. At three months it's ridiculous to put you and her through this kind of insanity.

You are not compatible. End of. "Hating" her is no more logical than hating the rain. Move somewhere where it doesn't rain so much?

"I've also talked to her about how she never wants to go anywhere...she's a netflix addict and pretty much only leaves the house for school and to get things from the store. She seems perfectly content with living in this isolated little world of hers and it seems like she just wants me there as her hermit-esque companion which I'm not into at all. "

There are plenty of guys who have this lifestyle and are also looking for a hermit companion. She needs to be free to find that, and you need to be free to find a better match as well.

As a psych major do you think Crazy 8s applies here?

"a way to save frustration and money instead of that relationship leap forward."

- You need to communicate. Let her know this and that you need your space & time still. She should be respectful of it.

You 2 only got involved this year... months ago. I dont think ti was a good idea to get a place together so soon after all?

You can consider putting an ad in the paper for someone else to kick in & pay the other half?

Instead of running away like most people why not just tell her how you feel instead of just avoiding the communication...Im sure its a reason she is like that. If you talk to her and she doesnt change then sub let and bounce.

God this sounds like a horrible situation! I think it's pretty damn clear u have zero interest in trying to work anything out with her so the kind thing to do is leave ASAP! Just explain to her that you're unhappy and need sometime on your own, by the sounds of things she'll probably throw a fit so just be mentally prepared for that. Breaking up with someone is no fun but it definitely needs to be done sadly. The very best of luck!