Welp, it's over.

I've been in denial so long.... He just left. I asked him what we were. He didn't want to commit to me and he said we would end up breaking up in the future anyway because he doesn't do long term, but he wanted us to do the slow fade. I said I could not do that. I've already been through hell and back living in this gray area where we were no longer defined by our relationship status and we both cried and now our respective weekends are ruined. He was meant to stay with me this weekend and we'd go to our mutual friends' Halloween party tomorrow night, but now neither of us is going. He said he hopes we can talk again as friends because I'm "the best girlfriend he's ever had" and I don't give myself enough credit and he doesn't want me gone from his life. We'll see. I have a long road ahead of me to be ok.....

It is hard, but whatever you do, do not keep him in your life. He made his choice, and that was to not have you in his life, at least not in any way that mattered. If you accept anything less than what you wanted (a committed relationship), or if you buy into his "let's stay friends" routine, all you'll do is set yourself up for a FWB relationship, because this is what he really means when he says he "doesn't want you gone from his life". If he was as into you as you were into him, he would have not ended the relationship. Take his "I don't do long term relationships" to mean he didn't see a future with you, and try to make peace with it. It is not a reflection on you, in any way, it's just that he realized you were not "the one". So in a way, he did you a favor by leaving and not letting you live in limbo any longer. Now it's up to you to make sure you don't stay in his life as a FWB, as someone to pass time until he meets someone he will want a relationship with.

The sooner you cut ties, the faster you'll start healing and the sooner you'll move on.

Yeah, you're right. Unfortunately.... This is my first real breakup and it is the hardest thing I've ever been through.

Ignore the "you are the best girl he ever had", he is clear that he doesn't want something long term and there are almost zero chances that you will be the exception. He will only be dragging this, probably for sex, while telling you these things and I find this very manipulative.

He said he hopes we can talk again as friends because I'm "the best girlfriend he's ever had" and I don't give myself enough credit and he doesn't want me gone from his life.

Ewww, I'd skip all that. Your goal was to get yourself out of limbo, not to keep yourself in it for the sake of playing friendzies.

The 'best GF in the world' can't make a guy want a relationship that he doesn't want. That only speaks of his limitations, not a deficiency in you.

Grieve, heal and you'll thank yourself later, when you find a guy who deserves you and makes you wonder what you ever saw in this one.

Head high.

Hey I know how you feel. I remember when my ex and I broke up. I was depressed and devastated.

I felt maybe it was something wrong with me. How can a relationship go smooth then all of a sudden go bad really fast.

I started to look on forums and online and figure out ways to see if I can fix the problem. Only way to fix it is to heal my friend.