After 4 months, he's back

THEY ALWAYS COME BACK. I didn't believe it when I heard it. But it is entirely true.

My ex boyfriend approached me at a party and asked if we could talk. We haven't spoken since the day we broke up 4 months prior. He ended up walking me home and has been texting me all day.

I'm not sure where I want this to go, because I have been doing AMAZINGLY without him. I guess I am just enjoying in the satisfaction.

In the 4 months we've been apart, I've grown and matured endlessly. I look better, i've lost weight, I've landed dream internships, won awards, etc. I've been truly focusing on myself.

For all of you who are hurting, I was there. I was incredibly depressed. Just keep focusing on yourself. We are worth so much more than the people who have wronged us. And don't forget, they'll be back.

What did you do for him to come back?

Why did it end in the first place? Do you want him back? don't let some attention from him undo all your hard work of moving on.

. . it's true. . they do return to the scene of the crime. Not always for the right reasons though.

Good for you that you've been doing so well!

So did he break up with the girl he was seeing? Do you still live with that girl? All seems a bit weird to me.

Not all come back but i think many do.

What's the history on this? Do you want me to search it here?

Just wondering how it ended and how long together.

I feel like I should say this because this thread could give a lot of people false hope: they do not always come back.

I'm happy that you're happy, sarah18, but they don't.

and when they do they usually just want the ego boost of a reply/see if they still have a chance & then disappear again.

Yeah, they do sometimes come back. The trick is, what's changed when they do.

They do not always come back, and threads like these are incredibly painful for people holding out hope for their exes to return bc it keeps them stuck in false hope. However, good for you that your ex did come back.

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Your right Lucha.

I agree. Please don't give suffering people false hope. They usually DON'T come back. Yours might be a special case. But it is not the majority. And even when they do come back, many reconciliations are not permanent/successful. The best thing to do is to plan for never hearing from them again.

I feel like I should say this because this thread could give a lot of people false hope: they do not always come back.

 

I'm happy that you're happy, sarah18, but they don't.

I agree. Sometimes they don't; sometimes they do.

So would talking to an ex and telling her that I'm sorry for some of the pain and disappointment Ive caused her, or not talk to her and leave her be with nothing to hope shed contact me later on ?

So would talking to an ex and telling her that I'm sorry for some of the pain and disappointment Ive caused her, or not talk to her and leave her be with nothing to hope shed contact me later on

contacting her and hoping for some outcome while saying leave her be is a contradiction

You need to be clear about your motive. Is this to relieve your own discomfort or is this stating a few carefully constructed words in an attempt to get her back. Or do genuinely care how she feels?

Those of us on the other side can sense the difference.

We broke up about a month ago. During then it was NC until I was invited to a dinner with friends. She came also knowing I was going too.

This week I invited her over for dinner as well as others, but she declined. So I want to tell her how I feel and how I wished things were different between us.

She accepted to talk as long as I don't beg her to take me back.

Short story we broke up a few times cause she wanted me to be around her all the time. 7 days a week. Said I'd change to be around more, but disappointed her again.

I think everyone's experience is different. More then not, my X's have come back, except for my last one as of today, you never know. I even had a HS boyfriend find me recently. But in those cases, I was not open or wishing for reconciliation.

So yes, some do, some don't.