Please tell me what is happening.I cant figure her out

Basically my ex says she wasn't sure about us and that she would only come back to me if she was 100 sure and that it would be for life.

I stopped talking to her , but then she'll start chasing and keep telling me she misses me and finding reasons to talk to me, reasons that dont even make sense.

She got a job Far away from me, called me and left a voicemail asking me what would happen with us if she took the job, wondering if it would be far or not. Just last week she contacted me saying she misses me and that she didn't take the job as i am part of the reasons holding her back. she sent me proof to show that she didn't accept the job.

I just joined a dating site today only to find my ex on it... Am going crazy.. I thinks she is playing me and stringing me along.

But sometimes I doubt myself because she made a job decision partly around me. it makes me think why arent we together then. I really do not know what is going on with her or what she is thinking. I mean surely if you made such a decision and keep contacting me with pointless "i miss you" messages, then why arent we together. I tried getting her back but she said i was pushing her away. But what am i meant to do seeing as she is on a dating site. Is this part of her trying to figure out if i am right for her? or am i just soo naive?

Please help me.

Ever caught a fish, placed it on a stringer and kept it in the water while you tried to catch other fish?

You're that fish on the stringer and she is looking for other fish.

It sounds like she doesn't want to let you go completely in case the people she meets aren't better. She's probably got her own issues that are making her do this, but you need to be firm and tell her that she either is with you or she isn't.

My advice would be to tell her not to contact you again unless SHE is serious about being with you, then cut contact because unless she wants a real relationship, why bother?

She might not be doing it with cruel intentions, but she is playing games.

Go NC, and don't allow yourself to be somebody's Plan B. Unless you hear it straight from her that she wants to be with you again, I would move on and not look back.

" I really do not know what is going on with her or what she is thinking. I mean surely if you made such a decision and keep contacting me with pointless "i miss you" messages, then why arent we together."

- That is all they are.. pointless i miss you msg's. I had the same from my ex, who chose to leave and he'd do the same, even though he was already involved with someone else.

I got tired of those games and stopped talking to him.

Don't let her take you on this ride anymore.. get off and concentrate on YOU. Work on doing your own things now and healing. You can't do it when she is messing your mind up this way.

Let her go date, whatever, as she chooses. Let her 'miss you' for real

Do not reply anymore.

I stopped talking to her , but then she'll start chasing and keep telling me she misses me and finding reasons to talk to me, reasons that dont even make sense.

Now is not the time to be a glutton for punishment, she dumped you, remember? Why participate in this silly game?