Been trying no contact, but she keeps texting me and im replying.

Me and my girlfriend of 9 months split up about a week ago. Those 9 months were withoutdevastated bt the best (as far as being in a relationship goes). I was there for her and she was there for me. We rarely had disagreements and if we did they were very minor and we usually got over it quickly. We never really fought everything always seemed great!

About 3 weeks ago things took a turn for the worse. To give you a little background history on her, she was on probation at the time for possession and dwi. This started in March and was a byproduct of a past relationship gone sour. We started talking about 3 months into her probation around June, and we hit it off quick. We had a great connection and had a lot of the same views regarding things. Same hobbies, same interests. Slowly we became best of friends and i finally asked her out and she said yes.

Everything was great during that time. We spent as much time as we could together,and i supported her throughtout her probation period. I brought her to classes she had to take. I went to every court meeting and helped her even pay some of that off.

Well as soon as she got off, is when it went sideways. Maybe i was expecting to much, maybei was being selfish. March 22nd she finished we got out of court and she was free of drug tests and all the hassle. Her first thought in her head was to call her best friend up and to tell them they should get f'd up tonight. I was upset but i tried not to show it. I knew she deserved to do whatever it is she wanted to do but i figured her first thought would be to try and have some fun with me since i helped her through it. She noticed i wasnt really saying much and we fought about it. I think i made her feel pretty ty about it and we didnt really talk much more about it. I apologized and said im sorry youre right its your day you went through all this i shoulnt be so selfish lets do whatever it is you want to do.

So ill skip a few days now because everything seemed fine. I picked her up from work one night and on the way home she says "so what do you think out problem is" in my head i was thinking we have a problem? So i merely said idk maybe its lack of communication. Im trying though. That night we talked a lot about it and she started saying things like you think i may do this and leave you or that and i leave you. Apparently i was too clingy. Dont know hoe this happened as she was always clingy too. She would beg me to stay home from work, beg me to come home early. I never was upset about it though. So this is the point i knew she wasnt telling me something.

The next two days were kind of met with silence towards each other until i finally sat her down to talk more about it. I said we need to work this out together because im not really sure i understand how this happened. She mentions maybe we should take a break. I was upset vut once again i tried my hardest not to show it. Finally i got it out of her.

She says ok look, theres this guy i work with and i like him a lot, and im not sure what to do about these feelings because i know i shouldnt be having them. Youre the best person ive ever been with and its not right to you. Shes crying her eyes out, and i did only what i know how to do. I was there for her for moral support. Coincidentally the next day was our anniversary. Now we moved in togethera few months beforehand so this was hard fkr me. That night while she was at work she texted me a lot saying how shes so sorry and that shes going to try and loom past it because she wants what we had again. That night i picked her up from work only for her to tell me she wants to move back homr at least for a few days. I said if thats what it takes thrn so be it, but i thoight you wanted to work things out? She says she does but she needs time to herself.

We spent the next day together and celebrated our anniversary. She left the house the next day. I did not initiate converation at all because i was giving her what she wanted. 5 days later she says we need to talk, and breaks up with me that day. I was devastated. She packed up more of her clothes all the while saying how hard it was. And i just sat there and moped. Im not going to go into more detail here as im sure you can imagine how this went down.

Few days go by with no contact. I broke it and decided to call her to try and talk. You can iagine it didnt fo well. She had no answers except idk. I made a bad comment about how i dont feel like im being treated fairly as she gave her ex many chances. She quikly ended the call, and texted me "look i dont want to be mean, but i cant give you an answer i dont have. I think its done."

So we'll skip a few more days. I didnt text or call anymore. Today is monday. Saturday she texted me just asking how i was doing. I said ok but then decided to call her again. We talked for a little bit. Just small talk, nothing about us as a couple and i ended the call soon after. Yesterday she texted me again at 2am. I didnt answer till i woke up in the morning after 6. She said she was just leaving the hospital. (Shes been really sick the past few weeks). I wished her good health and told her she should get some rest. She did. Then she texted me again later on asking hows it going. More small talk ensued she said something about tv. I didnt respond. Few hours later She texted me again saying how her neice was just over blah blah. I said a few things but ended the conversation quick.

So im at an endpass. I want to keep talking to her cause she is my best friend and im hoping that she'll come around and come back. Then again i know shes still talking to that other guy and i feel left out.

Im planning on not replying to anything she says from now on. Is that rude? Im just looking for hope and that we can reconcile ths later on, but its hard to talk to her as just a friend.

I hate to be blunt here but I have to. It kinda sounds like you were used. Don't reply and don't hope for reconciliation. She doesn't want it.

The only reason she's texting is to blur the fact that she broke up with you to go th another after all the sh*t you went through for her. Is that simple,so she will continue usibg you for emotional support till when the relationship with the other guy took off,then she will cut all contacts with you. Is no rocket science. Cut off all contact with her,if she's ready to work things out fine,if not then let her go

No it's not rude to stop replying, in fact I think it's a great idea. It'll be tempting but stay strong and don't do it. There's no way you'll get over her if you keep in contact. Block her number if you have to.

I hate to be blunt here but I have to. It kinda sounds like you were used. Don't reply and don't hope for reconciliation. She doesn't want it.

Is sum up every thing here,that's what crossed my mind as I was going through the post

She's throwing out the bait in order to keep you on the sidelines, in case this new guy doesn't fit the bill. Nothing good will ever come out of placing yourself on the back burner.

Yeah i think im starting to get fed up anyway. The more I think about it the more i realize this is all bull and that its not worth my time. The only issue is she still needs to come get a few things from my house. I already told her whem she can come by so she knows. But after that i will not talk to her again.

I realize now that I am someone who deserves better than this, so im moving on.

from what you said.. I think you are currently a nice doormat for her. She can do whatever she wants and youll be there. Bad day, Ill call Kev, I need something, Ill call Kev, I need a ride, Ill call Kev, need money... you guessed it..Call Kevin.

I see that you decided that you deserve better and that is good.. Im happy for you.