Boyfriend broke up with me because he doesn't love me anymore

So I'm 15 and a freshman and I went out with my ex for 11 months. I thought everything was fine until a couple of days ago when he said that he has to rethink our relationship and whether or not he's happy with me. An hour later he went downstairs to watch a movie with me and we cuddled so I thought everything was alright. But then right when I was leaving his house he told me that he still hasn't thought about it. I went up to him yesterday before school started to see where we stand and he said he didn't know so I told him to decide right there because I quite frankly cannot handle the anticipation. Pretty much, he didn't tell me so I cried all morning and he left school right after homeroom. We had first period together and when I didn't see him, I broke into tears because I was worried so my teacher sent me to the bathroom where I stayed for half of the period. My mom had to pick me up after school even though I usually went home with him and she told me that his dad called her and said Jordan (my ex) broke up with me! I had to find out through my mom and when I got home I read the fb message he sent me (My phone broke the day before). He practically said that there was no trust at all and that I thought he was going to cheat on me with my best friend, that in the beginning of the summer he couldn't wait to see my face and now it's the opposite, that he wanted to break up with me 6 months ago because his love for me turned into friendship. 1. The only time I ever broke his trust is when I told my friend Dan that he was absent because his balls hurt in which I told Jordan that I completely understood if he wanted to break up with me (he obviously stayed) 2. I never thought he was going to cheat on me. I was only upset because she told me that she thought he was cute, had a crush on him, and was mad when I said I liked him too. 3. What hurts the most is knowing that he could have ended it 6 months ago but instead dragged it out. Every single time he said he loved me, it wasn't the same way as I meant it. I feel played and lead on. I pretty much cried all last night and had my first panic attack when I was on the phone with him begging him to take me back and that I'll stop acting jealous, we can just not see each other as much and that he could trust me. He said that he'll never take me back and that he doesn't want me to change for him but he doesn't see that I HAVE changed already for him. I stopped doing drugs because I knew he hated it, I took out all my piercings, stopped dying my hair funky colors... I dress more girly now and live a clean lifestyle. I can't live without him and I just feel so LOST. He said its his first relationship and that he just wanted to feel love but overtime he realized he didn't love me. I don't want to be friends like he wants I want to be his GIRLFRIEND. It feels like my whole relationship is a lie and it hurts knowing that 3 days ago he was holding me in his arms in class saying that I took his breath away. Why would he say that if he only thought of me as a friend? IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AND HE WON'T EXPLAIN IT. His mom who is like a second mother is even avoiding me! Not only did I lose the love of my life, but also my second family. I want him back, how do I get him back? I need him. I can't just be fine with 'friends', I'll always want more than that. What do I do? I haven't stopped crying and haven't eaten all day because I just feel so empty!

i did not finish reading your post, you are 15, you need to focus on much more important stuff in your life, school for now, Boyfriends comes and goes, don`t get cough up in the romance and love and stuff like that, establish your self and have something to lean on, obviously not a teen that just wake up and tells you lets break up

Okay please take a breath and a moment to reflect. These kinds of thoughts are not healthy. I remember very well being 15 so please do not feel patronized or minimized by this but you are blowing this whole thing out of proportion. I have no doubt that from your perspective this 11 months may seem like a lifetime...as you say, you refer to his parents like a second family...but these things happen and you will get over it.

Right now you feel you can never be friends with him and that's fine, but that will pass. Right now you feel devastated by this break up but you will eventually start to feel better and lose interest in him. This is healing and it's something as a young woman you need to learn how to do because these are tools you will need for the rest of your life when bad things happen.

I hope you are able to talk to your mom or a close friend about all this. Hopefully they can shed some light on it.

My main advice is just to remember that how one acts in a time of crisis is very telling to their character. If you lose control of your emotions and involve others in your drama (ie his parents or friends), it will reflect poorly on you. If you take a moment to realize that it is HIS loss and you are better off without him....you will maintain your dignity and class and that will reflect very well on you.

I recommend reading "He's Just Not That Into You" by Greg Behrendt - I think it will help.