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Thread: How long did it take you to reconcile with your ex?

  1. #1
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    How long did it take you to reconcile with your ex?

    Have you ever broken up with your ex girlfriend or boyfriend?

    What did you do to reconcile with your ex and how long did it take you to get him or her back?

    What did you do and didn't do to get him or her back?

    For all making mistakes tell us your story so no one has to go thru a painfull break-up and if they have a chance in the future what mistake are no no's for you to get your ex back.

  2. #2
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    I don't know anything about getting an ex back, but my biggest mistake getting into my last relationship was not getting help for my low self-esteem and depression first. It did me no good and it dragged a very good guy into a very bad situation.

  3. #3
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    First girlfriend, it took a year and two months for the first reconcilliation. Three years for our second. Both happened after letting go completely.

    Most recent girlfriend, it was just a few months. We were in constant contact (worked together, had mutual friends), but it was lighter contact than before. We got back together after watching a horror movie and she wanted me to stay the night.

    Always, always, always let go and move on. That's pretty much the only way they can come back, when they know it's safe. And it's only safe when you've moved on. They just kinda know. It's weird. And even then, they don't usually come back anyway. But if you've moved on properly, you just don't care.
    "An ex is someone who is different from the person you first fell in love with. In a way an ex is a ghost of the person you used to love." -Clio
    "Dumpers and dumpees would both find the aftermath a lot easier if they treated the other how they would wish to be treated." -Markie6

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    Reconciliations that actually last need enough time. Seems like the average is about a year...the minimum is about 6 months and of course there are a lot that happen much longer than a year or never at all. Reconciliations that happen a few weeks or a few months post BU end up just failing again. Also, try not to think about things like "How much longer is this going to take?" because despite reconciliation stories MOST breakups are final.

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  6. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tom1990 View Post
    Always, always, always let go and move on. That's pretty much the only way they can come back, when they know it's safe. And it's only safe when you've moved on. They just kinda know. It's weird. And even then, they don't usually come back anyway. But if you've moved on properly, you just don't care.
    That seems like the common theme amongst getting them back. Plus what you just said is the first scene in the movie Swingers haha
    "Happiness is having a dream you cannot let go of and a partner who would never ask you to." -Robert Brault

  7. #6
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    After a relationship of 5 years, it took 8 months to reconcile.

    However last week, she broke up with me again after living together for 9 months.

  8. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous1984 View Post
    After a relationship of 5 years, it took 8 months to reconcile.

    However last week, she broke up with me again after living together for 9 months.
    Were you in contact for those 8 months? What was required by you to 'win' her back?

  9. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ang33 View Post
    That seems like the common theme amongst getting them back. Plus what you just said is the first scene in the movie Swingers haha
    My current theory is, when you make a connection with someone, there's some biological synchronization that happens. With some people, that synchronization happens right away. With others, it can take months or years. At any rate, it stays with you pretty much forever. That's where this "They just know when you've moved on" idea comes from. I am, of course, totally speaking out of my butt, but it's a fun theory.
    "An ex is someone who is different from the person you first fell in love with. In a way an ex is a ghost of the person you used to love." -Clio
    "Dumpers and dumpees would both find the aftermath a lot easier if they treated the other how they would wish to be treated." -Markie6

  10. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by eastonweston View Post
    Were you in contact for those 8 months? What was required by you to 'win' her back?
    We were no contact for about 3 weeks, afterwards she kept contacting me.

    This time however seems more serious... Allthough I hope she will come back in a couple of months....

  11. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous1984 View Post
    After a relationship of 5 years, it took 8 months to reconcile.

    However last week, she broke up with me again after living together for 9 months.


    No matter how I feel/felt about the ex....This is the reason why I would probably not reconcile.

    I know that Breakups can happen with anybody at anytime but you would always have it in the back of your mind that they did it once.......

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