I became friends with a male coworker 9 months ago. He had his eyes on me for over 1.5 years but never pursued because I had a BF. When I became single he made sure I noticed him. He asked me out for dates multiple times but never followed through using the old work excuses. I put him on the spot and he told me he cannot date long term because we work together.
I know he recently went through a divorce with a child a couple of years ago. I got out of a 6 year relationship a year ago. Neither of us are really ready to fully jump start into any relationship. He says he doesnt want a relationship and I told him the same.
We remained friends who would meet up occassionally. We would text for hours, call each other on the phone, I would come over to his place. We slept together twice both on my call without any pressure on his part. We are not dating or sleeping with anyone else.
He is 10 years my senior and his position is very senior within the company. We have both agreed that we would not visit each other at work. We dont work together, we rarely ever run into each other at work. His work is very demanding and he is in the office 6 days a week with a 12 hour day almost daily. He is aware that I am looking to leave the company.
The time we spend together is absolutely wonderful. Never a dull moment. We can be ourselves with each other. We cuddle, we kiss, we stare deeply into each others' eyes. We laugh at each others' jokes. He has told me "love you" three times now, I havent said it back to him.
He enjoys seeing me as his face and actions say it all, but he is scared and wont come say hi to me at work. Recently he has started showing deep feelings in his actions and his words which scared me a bit because I wasnt expecting this from him. His inconsistency makes me concern about his feelings for me. He would take one step to see me then take another step back because he cannot date someone from work. I am confused by his action. I am not looking to rush into any relationship but I want to know if I am wasting my time with this man. How do I know he really loves me and not just stringing me along? I would prefer not to date a coworker but I need assurance that we would date when I leave the company. Should I talk to him?