Just wondering how to better approach this situation. My wife tells me nearly every day that she is either tired or sick. We have 2 small kids, so this is actually true for both of us most of the time.
Now, I love my wife and am very attracted to her. However, if she's already told me today that she's either sick or tired, I don't 'feel' like it's nice, let alone loving, to her to want to have sex with her. To me, that would be really selfish behavior on my part. She often complains we don't have sex enough and when I've told her that when she tells me she's tired or sick that I'm not going to come a knocking, she thinks that means I'm just not attracted to her enough. Like I shouldn't be able to control myself. Well, I've had a lot of sex in my life and I enjoy it very much, but not so much that I'd ever want to have sex with someone who's sick just because I happen to be horny - that's just not a turn on for me at all. She's gone as far as telling me that even is she has told me she's sick or tired, I need to try anyway because she deserves the 'choice' and that by me not initiating when she's told me she's sick or tired I'm robbing her of that choice. This is frustrating to me because I think bothering a sick or tired person for sex is selfish and basically the opposite of love, however this is what she expects of me.
Should I just bite the bullet and do as she says? I feel like I wouldn't really be myself behaving that way...