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  1. #1
    Platinum Member Stella Sleepwalks's Avatar
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    Unhappy Tonsillitis after Oral Sex

    Hi Gang,

    I'm laying in bed with tonsillitis as I type this. Not very happy about it as you can imagine!

    This is the second time I have had tonsillitis in 5 years, and I have noticed a pattern, or perhaps a coincidence in both cases.... It pains me to say this, but the first time I came down with tonsillitis it was about a week after a one night stand with a work colleague. I gave him oral sex (he didn't finish) and about 5 days later I was in agony.

    This time around I went out with a guy last weekend, we had sex and I gave him oral (again he didn't finish) and low and behold - TONSILLITIS!

    Now, I have been to the doctor and got some antibiotics which will sort me out, but although I asked her about how bacterial tonsillitis can be contracted, I didn't mention that I'd had oral sex. The doctor did tell me, "Through very close contact, like kissing...", but I didn't push the issue further than that.

    I got a text of the guy I slept with on Thursday morning, to say that he had a sore throat and an itchy nose, and that he was (jokingly) blaming me as I have had a cold (though I didn't have tonsillitis at the time). I am a bit worried that he now has tonsillitis as we haven't spoken since then, and that I passed it on to him after I gave him oral. We haven't been in touch since, and I really don't want to text him with a "I have tonsillitis and I think you gave it to me during oral... hey, if you still have a sore throat I might have passed it back to you! Karma baby!" But if I have contracted it from him, he might have an STD and he should be made aware in case he passes it on to someone else.

    I am going to have a sexual health screening tomorrow to see if I'm ok.... should I tell him to get himself checked out or am I overreacting?
    You Gotta Go There To Come Back

  2. #2
    Silver Member hausser's Avatar
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    Speaking as a bloke I wouldn't tell him yet, wait until the results come back though I highly doubt they will show anything that doesn't mean you didn't pick up something. I always thought saliva had anti biotic properties though?

    Going back to telling him, this would be a major deal for me if a woman told me this so make sure you have it verified or else there is a good chance he will be having a laugh down the pub about it with his mates in a few weeks time.
    Last edited by hausser; 11-13-2011 at 11:30 AM.

  3. #3
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    Only tell him if you have an STD after you get checked out. Otherwise, I don't see a reason to tell him that you are going to get checked out. But sounds like you had a cold, didn't know it and spread it to him. Cold viruses sometimes does different things to different people. He may get strep throat instead or just a runny nose, who knows, that's the risk of contact, people pass colds. Hope that helps.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member lavenderdove's Avatar
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    Tonsillitis itself is just a bacterial infection so you don't pass on tonsilitis (i.e., just because you have tonsilitis doesn't necessarily mean someone else will get it). A variety of bacteria can cause tonsilitis, and that same bacteria you have might not give him tonsilities, but could give him a skin infection, sinus infection etc. Tonsilitis is not as common in adults, and many adults have had their tonsils out due to repeated infections and hence won't get it. It just means the tonsils got infected, and infections can settle anywhere (or not in the same place in different people).

    You also have to be careful because what might look like tonsilitis could well be another STD if you were giving him oral, so you need to tell your doctor about that if you think you contacted the infection via sexual contact.

    If your doctor took a swab and sent it out to see what kind of bacteria it was, you can call him back and tell him you had a throat infection and he may need antibiotics. What you interpreted as a cold at the time you were with him was a bacterial sinus infection that turned into tonsilitis as well so you probably passed the bacteria to him via kissing rather than oral sex.
    Last edited by lavenderdove; 11-13-2011 at 11:45 AM.

  5. #5
    Platinum Member Stella Sleepwalks's Avatar
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    I just text him - its a bit of a sore point actually. I had decided to go NC as he has decided he wants to win his ex girlfriend back, and I didn't want to get clingy and upset.... best just move on.

    We are always open and honest with one another, so I decided to tell him I had tonsillitis and that if he's still suffering a sore throat, get himself to the doctors asap. He responded telling me that he's not concerned about tonsillitis, he's been in bed three days with the flu. We chatted via text a little bit, not too many, I didn't mention going to the sexual health clinic tomorrow, just said get well soon etc. I asked whether he was able to eat and he said he'd not eaten today, but that someone was gonna drop some stew round for him later. I assumed it was his ex and he sheepishly said yes, although they're not back together and she has said she isn't ready for a relationship at the moment.... I'm trying to distance myself from their drama I swear!!!!

    I've done my bit so far. Don't think he will contact me again unless he has a change of heart and I will be going NC with no hard feelings. If I find something out at the clinic (god forbid) I will let him know, I just hope to god I'm alright!
    You Gotta Go There To Come Back

  6. #6
    Silver Member hausser's Avatar
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    That's ok, sounds tactful.

    Oh btw without being specific about where, I live VERY close to the band linked to your username and sig lol.

  7. #7
    Platinum Member Stella Sleepwalks's Avatar
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    Ooooh! Really? Listening to them now lol
    You Gotta Go There To Come Back

  8. #8
    Silver Member Notagoodninja's Avatar
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    I get that all the time and yeah it's triggered by oral sex for me too. I just need my tonsils out
    But at my age it's really very risky
    With tonsilitis/ strep it incubates 7 days...
    I don't see how either of you could have given it to each other over night, that doesn't really make sense to me..
    He prob just has cold, you prob will need your tonsils out one day if you keep giving head
    Every woman needs a man who will ruin her lipstick and not her mascara...

  9. #9
    Silver Member Notagoodninja's Avatar
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    About std's I'm a total germ phobe I've studied every one, and thankfully never had one! But it takes 30 days for an std to manifest...you don't have an std...lol you just have strep!

    And don't EVER tell a dude about it! that will just totally gross him out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Every woman needs a man who will ruin her lipstick and not her mascara...

  10. #10

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    This is very late to this thread but I hate bad or incorrect advice and since others may be reading this currently let's please let's have accurate information. Development of a sore throat/toncillitis with or without exudate (puss) could be an indication of oral gonorrhea (OG). I'm afraid to say notagoodninja is wrong when they say it takes 30 days to develop an std. That's the maximum time. It can take as little as 2 to 5 days. The safe advice would be to attend either a confidential sexual health clinic or be honest with your doctor and be screened for this and other stds and if the results prove positive, to receive the most appropriate antibiotics(abx). It is imperative you do this as some strains of OG are resistant to some abx. So you cannot assume that if you bluff your doctor into giving you a course of abx that they will clear up this infection. It is important that you also tell your sexual partner if you return a positive result. You can get support in how to go about telling a sexual partner that you have a infection from all sexual health clinics.
    I hope this provides information and support.

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