Let me start off by saying that I love my boyfriend very much. He treats me like a queen and would do almost anything for me but I can't help but be nervous about our future.
I grew up from a very well-to-do family that believe in education. Even though I wanted a much more modest lifestyle than the one I grew up in (the big house, expensive cars....), I still want a good career and am currently going to college to pursue that. My boyfriend, however, feels differently.
He grew up in a modest lifestyle, like what I want, but he's not ambitious. He's had a job for nearly 5 years in retail (for privacy sake, I'm not going to say the company) but is still in the same position as when he started. In fact, I work there part time which is how I met him. He has tried to get promoted but with no success. He makes excuses for his slow progress like how he has been transferred between stores and at one point he tried to go to culinary school (again, no success).
He tells me that he's going to move up and make a decent living but I'm having a hard time seeing that happen. He's so stubborn and I believe it's holding him back. For example, this winter he let his hair and beard grow ridiculously out of control and refused to groom himself for an interview. He said it wouldn't make a difference. He also refuses to continue his education claiming he doesn't need a degree. Which he doesn't but I know it's much harder. He is even back living with his parents (even though he plans to move out this summer) and they are constantly getting on him about this. Now he is almost 25 and I am getting nervous.
We want a lot of the same things but he strikes me as nieve when it comes to being financially stable. Again, I don't want to be "rich" but I want to be able to have a stable life and a husband that can support that. My family hasn't made it much easier because they keep giving me examples of people the know who "settled" and everything fell apart. Being ambitious and constantly doing everything to better myself, it's hard to accept the fact that my boyfriend isn't going anywhere. I know that if I was in his place at 25, I'd be very pissed at myself.
I've tried to talk to him about it but it comes out so hurtful. He even said "I can't believe you are judging me this much because of my status."
I'm not sure what I want advice wise. Maybe some thought? This situation is