First of all, I love my boyfriend very much. We have been together for a year and a half and have been living together for almost a year. We both are very stable professionals and have talked about marriage and children in our future.
This weekend was his birthday (37) and his childhood friend (who he has remained close with throughout his life) came to visit. When his friend and I were talking, his friend said, "you know, I'm glad that Jeff has found a great girl because he has been through some tough stuff - I mean, he had a kid that he thought was his and it turned out to be someone else's kid..." I was shocked because he had never mentioned anything about this situation to me.
When I confronted him about this situation in his past, he told me that he was married for about two years 15 years ago - when he was about 19 years old. He said it was a very rocky and abusive relationship and she had a baby. He thought the kid was his and was very excited, then later had a paternity test done and discovered that the kid wasn't his. However, under California law he is still paying child support to this day because the paternity test wasn't done before the kid was 2 years old. He said it was a terrible situation and didn't know how to tell me because it still upsets him.
Now I am doubting whether or not I really know this man...this life experience obviously affected him deeply and he didn't share it with me. I don't even know if he would have ever told me at all about it...