Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 54
  1. #1
    Bronze Member mateus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Age
    39
    Posts
    232
    Gender
    Male

    My Girlfriend is active on a dating website, any suggestions?

    Hello,

    I have been seeing a girl now for just over 2 months (we have been very close and are exclusive) and we were friends for 3 months before we started dating. It was nice that we were friends initially and had built up some trust between us.

    Anyway last week she mentioned that she had to take herself off a particular dating website as she was still getting emails. I guess just out of curiosity I had a look at this website and to my dismay found that she has been active within the last 24hours.

    I guess I could give her the benefit of the doubt for the short term (1 week) just incase she is figuring out how to take her profile off. Although if she continues to be always active within 24 hours then obviously something is not quite right here.

    How should I go about this situation and at what point do I raise the subject with her?
    Last edited by mateus; 02-07-2011 at 05:27 PM.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    13,120
    Gender
    Female
    When someone is "active" it could simply mean they checked their messages or even just logged in to change their settings - like setting their notifications off. SOME dating sites aren't accurate and even "fake" that a user is online to make new subscribers think the site is just bustling with activity from hotties. Also, when she says she is getting emails, she might not be getting emails from guys but could be simply getting site newsletters, etc etc. If she said she was taking herself off a website, then I would just take her word for it and trust her. If she signed up for a few of them, she could have forgotten about one of them especially if she had a free membership.

  3. #3
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    8
    you have to be upfront and politely ask if she is going to stay registered on that site. you can say that its important to you because you really like her and feel confused as to why she still has an active profile.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    5,541
    Gender
    Female
    I don't think that you have anything to worry about. She actually went out of her way to tell you that she's still on a site and still receiving messages. These are not the actions of someone trying to hide something - but rather, the actions of someone who is upfront and honest about stuff.

    Wait a week or so and if she still hasn't taken down her profile - ask if she got around to it.

    I wouldn't get all freaked out, though. It's early days and she went out of her way to be honest with you. I highly doubt there is anything fishy going on. She could just be saying her goodbyes to people she had made friends with (when I was doing the online thing, I still did and do keep in contact with some of the guys who weren't matches but were cool people).

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member Jd1983's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Age
    30
    Posts
    5,266
    Gender
    Female
    I don't think you should have anything to worry about. She openly volunteered the information to you, if she had anything to hide, she wouldn't feel the need to do so.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Stay_home's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    4,311
    At least she's being honest with you about it, that's a good thing. I say give her a couple weeks and then just ask her if she remembered to take it down.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member BriarRose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    7,571
    Gender
    Female
    It takes 2 minutes to remove or hide a profile, and she's had a week. I would talk to her, and if she still doesn't remove it, I would put up a profile, too.
    "My requirements for a man are simple; no man-boobs, nothing abnormally small or large, and no third anything...." ~ Hot in Cleveland ~

  9. #8
    Platinum Member sidehop's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Age
    36
    Posts
    6,878
    Gender
    Male
    Quote Originally Posted by BriarRose View Post
    It takes 2 minutes to remove or hide a profile, and she's had a week. I would talk to her, and if she still doesn't remove it, I would put up a profile, too.
    lol that's a bit passive-aggressive. I'd just tell her if it's still up "hey I saw your profile up still" and leave it at that.
    [URL="http://www.enotalone.com/forum/forum-rules.php"][SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][/URL]

  10. #9
    Bronze Member mateus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Age
    39
    Posts
    232
    Gender
    Male
    Thanks for the advice guys! Yes I guess its best to leave it a week or so and then I will mention it to her if the profile is still up.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member BriarRose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    7,571
    Gender
    Female
    Quote Originally Posted by sidehop View Post
    lol that's a bit passive-aggressive. I'd just tell her if it's still up "hey I saw your profile up still" and leave it at that.
    I would bet money that she'll just give him some lame excuse about checking emails or hasn't had time to take it down. She is his girlfriend, her profile should not be up on a dating site. This shouldn't even be open to discussion, he shouldn't even have to remind her.
    "My requirements for a man are simple; no man-boobs, nothing abnormally small or large, and no third anything...." ~ Hot in Cleveland ~

Page 1 of 6 1234 ... LastLast
Related Articles & Books
by Margarita Nahapetyan
One of the biggest causes of stress and unhappiness in life are failed relationships. Making a relationship work is one of the most important life ...
by Margarita Nahapetyan
It has been universally acknowledged that having a long distance relationship is not such a good idea, especially if there is no known end-date to ...
by Margarita Nahapetyan
Some people say that when we deeply love or care about someone we automatically open the door to betrayal. I am not sure whether such statement holds ...
 

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Expert Advice

Online
Chat
$3/minute
Caring professional willing to listen and help whether you're having relationship issues with parents/children/or other loved ones. Contact me now!
Online
Call
$1.99/minute
25+ YEARS EXPERIENCE. Intervention specialist and counselor who helps couples and families repair and rescue their relationships. "generously affordable"
Online
CallChat
$2.75/minute
Licensed Psychotherapist, Author, Relationship Expert Pictured on Oprah. With 25 years of experience, I provide caring, honest, non-judgmental help for your relationship issue
Online
Call
$1.95/minute
I do have extensive training and experience in clinical, counseling and transpersonal psychology. I provide counseling support for those willing to work on themselves...
Online
CallChat
$2.67/minute
► If we take a good look, we can learn more about ourselves in relationships than anywhere else! ◄