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  1. #1
    Bronze Member HappyHealing's Avatar
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    Strong Man - what's your definition of a Strong Man

    One of the qualities i keep hearing that woman desires in a man is that he is a strong person - not necessarily in a physical/masculine sense, but of a strong character.

    My question for you is that what do you consider as signs of a 'strong man'. How do you tell of one's strength from his behaviors. If you see indication of 'signs of weakness' in a man please do share also.

    I'd really like to explore and find out what everyone really mean when they talk about a 'strong man' and how you see strength in a person...

    Thanks

  2. #2
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    Standing up for what is right, setting boundaries, illustrating ownership over his own well-being and the empathy of the well being of someone else, perceiving it as the nice thing to do because weakness is when you call yourself a man and behave like a boy (emotionally). This is true in not just romantic relationships. Human relationships in general.

    It takes a bit of fearlessness, that which we all have to confront in order to grow.
    Last edited by easyguy; 09-21-2010 at 06:46 PM.
    "Where there is no love, pour love in, and you will draw love out."
    -St. John of the Cross

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Jd1983's Avatar
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    Personally, I think a strong man is someone who's not afraid to tell you things as is, and yet still be able to be emotional when needed.

    He has a mind of his own, and yet still be willing to compromise.

    Aside from the physical sense, these are probably the traits I would describe as someone who's strong.

    I consider my bf strong, in the sense that I feel at ease with him. I know that he'll always be there for me, regardless and I feel safe in his arms.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Moontiger's Avatar
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    1)Taking ownership of his actions
    2) Having opinions and being open to other points of view
    3) Confident but aware he is not god's gift,

    There are loads of other qualities but these are my top three for defining a strong man. Actually, a strong person in general.
    "Recognizing somebody else's power does not diminish your own." -Joss Whedon
    "Saying that you're a nice guy is like a restaurant whose only selling point is that the food doesn't make you sick [...]"- http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/#ixzz2mOdY2dPO

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  6. #5
    Silver Member anu1560's Avatar
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    Strong Man

    a) Takes responsibility of his actions
    b) Thinks for himself (Not in selfish terms). Has a head of his own and stands for his ideals. Doesn't change his stance for convenience.
    c) Gives his coat when I am cold, tries to be protective even if he is a skinny-no muscles guys. Is gentle to women, other human beings and animals.
    d) Aggressive but yet gentle in bed (very few people can do that)
    Laughter is the best medicine :)

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Mauxly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by easyguy View Post
    Standing up for what is right, setting boundaries, illustrating ownership over his own well-being and the empathy of the well being of someone else, perceiving it as the nice thing to do because weakness is when you call yourself a man and behave like a boy (emotionally). This is true in not just romantic relationships. Human relationships in general.

    It takes a bit of fearlessness, that which we all have to confront in order to grow.
    Exactly. Bingo.

  8. #7
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    And a "strong" man is also satisfied with being single, because if he claims (not just claims to claim) ownership of his mind, body, and spirit, he should be wise enough to see a romantic relationship not as his highest purpose, but as an intersection in his greater tapestry. If a man is vibrating with incompleteness while single, then he is further informed of just how much ownership he actually demonstrates. A man should own himself, transferring it through all kinds of relationships. It shouldn't stop, but it often does, because we are likely to doubt ourselves when we walk into more emotional territory. When we resist confrontation of our own aversions, the issue will remain at a simmer. It's easy to think that setting boundaries or standing up for what is right is mean, but you are actually setting yourself up to awaken to the grander truth: love.

    I understand that what I said my sound heavy, but it's actualization allows for a more heightened sense of weightlessness.
    Last edited by easyguy; 09-21-2010 at 08:14 PM.
    "Where there is no love, pour love in, and you will draw love out."
    -St. John of the Cross

  9. #8
    Platinum Member tiredofvampires's Avatar
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    As usual, great posts from easyguy. He's pretty much covered everything. And I love your signature, by the way, EG:

    "Never forget that justice is what love looks like in public." -Dr. Cornel West

    I would say that's the hallmark of a strong man: he's just, and able to love. And he brings that sense of integrity to all his interactions, without preference.

    A strong man:

    1. Stands up for himself and his principles
    2. Criticizes himself, and also can apologize; isn't too proud to be fair or change his views, with proper investigation
    3. Stands up for others who are at a disadvantage and protects those he loves, whether it makes him look good or not
    4. Speaks to his adversaries diplomatically, with emotional calm and equanimity -- he has control over his reactiveness
    5. Is self-reliant but knows when to ask for help
    6. Isn't afraid to be vulnerable and cry
    7. Doesn't go into denial or act avoidant about the hurts he experiences or those of others
    8. Knows when to act decisively, but also has patience
    9. Picks himself up when life throws him down -- perseveres against all adversity
    10. Does not mock softness or tenderness, or even weakness in anyone else
    Last edited by tiredofvampires; 09-21-2010 at 08:37 PM.
    BURN TO LEARN

    Pay no mind to the distant thunder
    Beauty fills her head with wonder

    It is not generally a characteristic of being brainwashed to know that you've been brainwashed.

    You can live a life, or you can have an existence.


    *****
    Love is its own reward.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member
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    A "strong" man, also, does not allow mistakes or undesirable outcomes be a self-loathing reflection of himself. He knows he doesn't know everything, and what ignorance he has will not kill him, but he doesn't wish to resign in a constant state of ignorance.

    And Dr. Cornel West is someone I greatly admire. Some of his quotes shot me down when I read them.
    "Where there is no love, pour love in, and you will draw love out."
    -St. John of the Cross

  11. #10
    Platinum Member tiredofvampires's Avatar
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    ^Yes. A strong man is a man who is not complacent, yet he's not brutal to himself.

    All of this goes for women as well, though.

    We are talking about what makes a "mensche" in a human sense.
    BURN TO LEARN

    Pay no mind to the distant thunder
    Beauty fills her head with wonder

    It is not generally a characteristic of being brainwashed to know that you've been brainwashed.

    You can live a life, or you can have an existence.


    *****
    Love is its own reward.

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