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  1. #1
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    FWB with an Older Woman

    I met this woman who is 20 years older than me on Facebook. (I am 20.) We messaged back and forth and I discovered that she lives at a city I visit regularly every summer. I told her this and she said "We can hang out together and discover some new places! =)".

    I haven't replied to her yet. I do not know if her message implies something more than hanging out but I would like to make known that what I want is more than just hanging out, basically a fwb type of relationship. How can I test the waters without directly asking her and scaring her away? Should I do this on Facebook or wait for the moment until we hang out? What are your ideas?

  2. #2
    Silver Member Odysseus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by adonis_boy View Post
    I met this woman who is 20 years older than me on Facebook. (I am 20.) We messaged back and forth and I discovered that she lives at a city I visit regularly every summer. I told her this and she said "We can hang out together and discover some new places! =)".

    I haven't replied to her yet. I do not know if her message implies something more than hanging out but I would like to make known that what I want is more than just hanging out, basically a fwb type of relationship. How can I test the waters without directly asking her and scaring her away? Should I do this on Facebook or wait for the moment until we hang out? What are your ideas?
    Two approaches:
    1) Just come out and tell her what you are looking for
    2) go into standard flirting mode, and work your way up to it

    I'd suggest #2 has a better chance of success than #1, but it depends on the woman. How long have you been exchanging messages with her?
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  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by adonis_boy View Post
    I met this woman who is 20 years older than me on Facebook. (I am 20.) We messaged back and forth and I discovered that she lives at a city I visit regularly every summer. I told her this and she said "We can hang out together and discover some new places! =)".

    I haven't replied to her yet. I do not know if her message implies something more than hanging out but I would like to make known that what I want is more than just hanging out, basically a fwb type of relationship. How can I test the waters without directly asking her and scaring her away? Should I do this on Facebook or wait for the moment until we hang out? What are your ideas?
    Play along. Ask her "And just where might those places may be...."

  4. #4
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    "What sort of places would you like to discover (with me)?"

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
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    Yes, she wants you. Ha!

  7. #6

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    BAH. Come on people! A 40 year old woman wouldn't just be TALKING to a 20 year old guy. She wants it...is my thought. But yeah...be coy and flirtacious. She'll make it clear, soon enough.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member guynextdoor's Avatar
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    recommend her to play with your wii. Tell her she'll get a good workout from it.
    Sabrina don't stare at it, eat it!- Patrick Bateman

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Miss Firecracker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by IGlareOften View Post
    BAH. Come on people! A 40 year old woman wouldn't just be TALKING to a 20 year old guy. She wants it...is my thought. But yeah...be coy and flirtacious. She'll make it clear, soon enough.
    Yeah, she wouldn't risk embarrassing herself unless there was something really good in it for her.

  10. #9
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    Since you are not friends with her then it can't be a "friends with benefits" situation. You want to meet her and if you find her attractive and want her sexually, you want to have intercourse with her. So, why not ask her, before you meet, if she'd be interested in seeing if the two of you click romantically, or if she means she just wants to hang out as friends. If she says she is not looking for any type of romantic connection, don't meet her. I wouldn't insult her intelligence by using meaningless acronyms like "FWB" - but also no need to ask her bluntly whether she wants to have sex. Asking her about the romantic potential should do the trick and is much more honest than pretending that you want to be a friend of hers in any way.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    My ideas on it are that you could quickly find yourself in deeper than you imagine right now. And not in a good way.

    At least find someone in your own city who you can check up on to see what their deal is. Even if you are just looking for sex, especially if you are just looking for sex.

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