I'm a 39 year old female, married 17 years to a wonderful guy that I love very much and have recently found an exboyfriend on Facebook. We dated 20 years ago but I was an idiot and broke it off with him. I emailed him in Dec explaining how I was a kid and stupid and scared and should have never done that. I asked him to lunch or coffee just to catch up and be friends but for some reason he thinks that I want to have an affair and am stalking him because I emailed him the next day to say whats up, how are you, what have you been up to for the past 20 years, etc. He is married to his third wife with 3 kids with her and one from a previous marriage that he knocked up on the rebound from me way back then. I just want to reconnect as friends not ruin his life or mine and don't see where lunch equates to sex. I did some searching on Myspace and friends of his wife mentioned him cheating on her last fall so maybe he thinks that all women want him now for sex, who knows. My best friend of 18 years is a single guy my age who grew up with my husband so we are all close friends and that is it so it is possible to be friends with a guy and just that. This ex had issues with me having male friends when we dated which is one reason we broke up but obviously I can handle and my husband trusts me, etc. I want to contact him again but not seem like a stalker. He also had his wife email me when he did and he posted on HIS Facebook wall instead of mine that I was stalking him which I'm not, I wanted to explain to him how to use Facebook but I refrained. I was so mad I didn't read his wife's email. She sounds like a young moron, she is 25 and he is almost 37 so it is obvious why he is with her..young, naive, controllable,etc..anyway, should I try to make amends? At one time we were very much in love but I messed up and it is something that I have always regretted so I feel like we can be friends and have things in common but I not a homewrecker or stalker.