I feel like my whole life passed me by, I'm 24 and I feel so old. I feel like everything I do from this point on is useless. Like for example, why take care of my skin if I'll just get wrinkles in 30 years or something? Its not about skin, but its like, why bother doing anything if it all goes away or dies or ends? I think that's the worst way to think but that's how I've been thinking since I turned 24 some months back.
I think I just really feel like I haven't lived, I still live at home and that's a huge reason why. But I can't afford to move out yet. However, I have definite plans of moving out in the fall next year with my boyfriend.
And I've always said to myself things will be so much better when I have my own place, I'll be able to have people over and be out late without my mother waiting up (yes). I just stopped bothering when I realized that's how it would be. This and that, but will I even want to do that when the time finally comes?
Another thing is I am such a home body and I hate that. I go to work and I come home and all I want to do is stay home and relax while other people I know all go out a few weeknights. And on weekends I really just want a quiet weekend to go get my shopping done and see my boyfriend, its only 2 days off.. so I never like to make super elaborate plans.
I don't know what to do, I feel like I'm just barely understanding what my problem is but I am feeling SO unfulfilled and just completely not happy...
I definitely keep waiting for it to get better, like I'm waiting for the day (whenever that is, I honestly don't know when that could be nowadays) and for right now I'm just forcing the days to pass me by until I get there. I'm totally wasting my life!!