I move on like a sinners prayer...

kevinm · 08-20-2009, 10:15 PM

If you know the reference I'm alluding to above 10 points for you!!!

Don't post the answer, but PM me if you want confirmation. Moving on...

I'm having that "I'll never find anyone" feeling right now. Down, out, struggling, and doing my best to stay positive.

Uggh... everyone who is interested in me is incompatible in some way. And everyone I'm interested in is either in a far away land, or is unavailable for one reason or another. People have criticized me for being too picky, but I just won't settle.

I feel like I've struggled for years now... and I'm about to give up on the opposite sex and focus on my career for the rest of my life. Maybe I'm meant to be alone forever? What a depressing thought that is

I also feel like I'm the perpetual rebound guy... I keep helping other people move on and become happy, all the while never finding someone for myself. Does anyone else feel this way?

-Kevin

Gratsy · 08-20-2009, 10:27 PM

I feel this way. I feel like guys always use me to heal them from past relationships, I'm often used....then, they are done and go find another girl to marry.

I feel very alone. I am asked out occassionally, by guys I'm not into. And I'm lead on by guys I'm interested in, until they are tired of using me for their ego.

I have been alone for too long but I don't know what to do about it. I don't have it in me at all to settle.

cantexplain · 08-20-2009, 10:31 PM

Yeah, when being single and/or avoidant of a deep connection is what I really want/need at that stage in my life, while other parts of me want to connect with someone.

Then I'll get to a place that I really want to connect in a deep way, I open up to possibilities that I'd otherwise be picky about, and wala!! ... I'm hip on someone that is also hip on me.

Othertimes someone good pursues me, gives up, backs off, and I realize I'm a fool.

All-in-all, however, I think picky is good and pays off. At the very least there's less baggage to carry and explain on down the road.

Working on self is attractive.

Knight of Hope · 08-20-2009, 10:33 PM

Yup. Right now, actually. Most of the women in my dental school class are dating someone seriously, engaged, or married. And that's only going to get worse as time goes on. Since school is my scene (yeah I'm a nerd), prospects are looking kind of slim.

One of the single girls in my class is airheaded (I can't believe it in dental school but it's true). The other girl I know is single doesn't share my religious beliefs. There's another girl I'm pretty sure is single, and she seems nice enough. So I asked her out (studying and pizza) for this weekend, but she said she was busy and suggested that I hang out with her and her friends instead. I don't know how to read that. And in any case, I'm not sure how much I even like this girl. I haven't known her long enough to really know. I asked her out early to avoid the friend zone, but asking early comes with its own set of super-awesome and amazingly fun challenges. And that's only the girls I've met in the past month.

I don't mean to sound pessimistic, but sometimes I feel I have the worst luck with women in the whole world. And, like you, sometimes I feel I should give up and focus just on my career. If I get lonely, I'll just buy myself a puppy who would sit on my lap and be a good companion.

I still have hope, though... 23 is still young.

Oh, and I could always wear my white dentist coat to the bars. Girls like doctors, right?

(My ethics professor would skin me alive if I did that, but I might just have a date! lol)

kevinm · 08-20-2009, 10:54 PM

Thanks everyone for letting me know I'm not the only one...

Cantexplain: Othertimes someone good pursues me, gives up, backs off, and I realize I'm a fool.

Yep, been there too!!!

So what's the solution to our dilema?

cantexplain · 08-20-2009, 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kevinm

Thanks everyone for letting me know I'm not the only one...

Cantexplain: Othertimes someone good pursues me, gives up, backs off, and I realize I'm a fool.

Yep, been there too!!!

So what's the solution to our dilema?

The only thing I can think of is to learn from the lesson. Pay better attention. Be more open and sensitive. Take risks.

Southern · 08-21-2009, 01:05 AM

Bleh, I'm in the same boat. I've been asked out and stuff. In fact, a guy approached me in Starbucks last week and asked to take me out, but he just wasn't doing it for me. My standards are like sky high. I used to think it was bad, cuz I was starting to feel like I'll never find anyone that wonderful, but I've just sort of let go of that mentality. I know that my high standards are good and it'll all pay off one day.

Brightest Dark · 08-21-2009, 03:38 PM

I hear ya. I'm picky. Only want the shy guy who lives far away, who probably doesn't think about me because he knows we live so far away. No guys on sites like POF are my type... :-/ And now I'm starting to get older I'm thinking I'm gonna be losing my looks so no-one I like would probably even like me back even if I did spot anyone else I like anyway. lol.

rollingalong · 08-22-2009, 01:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kevinm

If you know the reference I'm alluding to above 10 points for you!!!

Don't post the answer, but PM me if you want confirmation. Moving on...

I'm having that "I'll never find anyone" feeling right now. Down, out, struggling, and doing my best to stay positive.

Uggh... everyone who is interested in me is incompatible in some way. And everyone I'm interested in is either in a far away land, or is unavailable for one reason or another. People have criticized me for being too picky, but I just won't settle.

I feel like I've struggled for years now... and I'm about to give up on the opposite sex and focus on my career for the rest of my life. Maybe I'm meant to be alone forever? What a depressing thought that is

I also feel like I'm the perpetual rebound guy... I keep helping other people move on and become happy, all the while never finding someone for myself. Does anyone else feel this way?

-Kevin

Don't worry. Be Happy!

08-20-2009, 10:15 PM	#1
kevinm Offline Gold Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 881	I move on like a sinners prayer... If you know the reference I'm alluding to above 10 points for you!!! Don't post the answer, but PM me if you want confirmation. Moving on... I'm having that "I'll never find anyone" feeling right now. Down, out, struggling, and doing my best to stay positive. Uggh... everyone who is interested in me is incompatible in some way. And everyone I'm interested in is either in a far away land, or is unavailable for one reason or another. People have criticized me for being too picky, but I just won't settle. I feel like I've struggled for years now... and I'm about to give up on the opposite sex and focus on my career for the rest of my life. Maybe I'm meant to be alone forever? What a depressing thought that is I also feel like I'm the perpetual rebound guy... I keep helping other people move on and become happy, all the while never finding someone for myself. Does anyone else feel this way? -Kevin

08-20-2009, 10:31 PM	#3
cantexplain Offline Gold Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Southeastern US Gender: Male Age: 46 Posts: 844	Yeah, when being single and/or avoidant of a deep connection is what I really want/need at that stage in my life, while other parts of me want to connect with someone. Then I'll get to a place that I really want to connect in a deep way, I open up to possibilities that I'd otherwise be picky about, and wala!! ... I'm hip on someone that is also hip on me. Othertimes someone good pursues me, gives up, backs off, and I realize I'm a fool. All-in-all, however, I think picky is good and pays off. At the very least there's less baggage to carry and explain on down the road. Working on self is attractive. __________________ "You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete." - Buckminster Fuller

08-21-2009, 01:05 AM	#7
Southern Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Gender: Female Age: 20 Posts: 1,231	Bleh, I'm in the same boat. I've been asked out and stuff. In fact, a guy approached me in Starbucks last week and asked to take me out, but he just wasn't doing it for me. My standards are like sky high. I used to think it was bad, cuz I was starting to feel like I'll never find anyone that wonderful, but I've just sort of let go of that mentality. I know that my high standards are good and it'll all pay off one day. __________________ "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~Dr. Seuss

08-21-2009, 03:38 PM	#8
Brightest Dark Offline Silver Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 520	I hear ya. I'm picky. Only want the shy guy who lives far away, who probably doesn't think about me because he knows we live so far away. No guys on sites like POF are my type... :-/ And now I'm starting to get older I'm thinking I'm gonna be losing my looks so no-one I like would probably even like me back even if I did spot anyone else I like anyway. lol. __________________ I'm a Sagittarian. That's all you need to know.

08-20-2009, 10:27 PM	#2
Gratsy Offline Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 2,436	I feel this way. I feel like guys always use me to heal them from past relationships, I'm often used....then, they are done and go find another girl to marry. I feel very alone. I am asked out occassionally, by guys I'm not into. And I'm lead on by guys I'm interested in, until they are tired of using me for their ego. I have been alone for too long but I don't know what to do about it. I don't have it in me at all to settle.

08-20-2009, 10:33 PM	#4
Knight of Hope Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana Gender: Male Posts: 281	Yup. Right now, actually. Most of the women in my dental school class are dating someone seriously, engaged, or married. And that's only going to get worse as time goes on. Since school is my scene (yeah I'm a nerd), prospects are looking kind of slim. One of the single girls in my class is airheaded (I can't believe it in dental school but it's true). The other girl I know is single doesn't share my religious beliefs. There's another girl I'm pretty sure is single, and she seems nice enough. So I asked her out (studying and pizza) for this weekend, but she said she was busy and suggested that I hang out with her and her friends instead. I don't know how to read that. And in any case, I'm not sure how much I even like this girl. I haven't known her long enough to really know. I asked her out early to avoid the friend zone, but asking early comes with its own set of super-awesome and amazingly fun challenges. And that's only the girls I've met in the past month. I don't mean to sound pessimistic, but sometimes I feel I have the worst luck with women in the whole world. And, like you, sometimes I feel I should give up and focus just on my career. If I get lonely, I'll just buy myself a puppy who would sit on my lap and be a good companion. I still have hope, though... 23 is still young. Oh, and I could always wear my white dentist coat to the bars. Girls like doctors, right? (My ethics professor would skin me alive if I did that, but I might just have a date! lol)

08-20-2009, 10:54 PM	#5
kevinm Offline Gold Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 881	Thanks everyone for letting me know I'm not the only one... Cantexplain: Othertimes someone good pursues me, gives up, backs off, and I realize I'm a fool. Yep, been there too!!! So what's the solution to our dilema?