Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14
  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    england
    Posts
    143
    Gender
    Female

    How come my ex hates me?

    Ok, i dont get it????? How come my ex hates me now? He broke up with me, i was heartbroken and i had a real hard time dealing with the loss of our relationship.

    In brief:-

    We split up mid feb, i cried, begged pleaded etc and did all the wrong things, then backed off a bit. For a while he kept calling me (drunk) and crying, sayin he missed me blah blah blah and in the morning it was always sorry i'm not in love with you and shouldnt have called. During this time he was seeing someone else and lying about it, so when i found this out I changed my number. i just couldnt stand the pain of the emotional drunk calls which gave me a glimmer of hope, whilst knowing for sure he was with someone else.

    Turns out he was lying to this new girl too saying that i wont leave him alone and cant get over him etc when he was the one to make contact!!! He's still with her i think, but now i hear he's bad mouthing me all over town when he goes out, saying how much he dislikes me and that i'm a stalker etc. I havent even spoken to him since he last called me crying, drunk as usual 4 wks ago. I was the one pleading for him to go NC so i could get over him!!

    Why does he suddenly hate me? I've done nothing to him. I'm just staying away and hoping i'll get over it soon. I hate the thought that he genuinely hates me. Whats with this??? Why would he suddenly hate me??? Why would he say these nasty things when i treated him so well and he was my world, i would have done anything for him and he knows it!!!

    Sorry about this rant but i just dont get it???? Argh!!!! I'm just trying to get over it, thats hard enough without the hate and bad mouthing!!!! Is it to get me to contact him about these rumours, or could he really hate my guts??

  2. #2

    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    547
    I don't know but sounds like you are well rid of him, you have to let this go and move on. Like you say, you did nothing wrong. If he is spreading lies about you that says a lot about him, at least your true friends won't believe him.

  3. #3
    Bronze Member SunniDee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    199
    Sounds like he's hurting and your NC has really gotten to him so his pride is hurt and this is the only way he knows how to deal. Not very mature, but you can't change how people cope with things.

    I understand what you're going through though. My ex is still insisting to anyone that will listen that I stalk him and won't stop bothering him, won't leave him alone, etc. even when I haven't talked to him in weeks AND threatened an RO if HE didn't leave me alone. LOL.

    Hang in there. This is his issue. You're not a bad person.

  4. #4
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    england
    Posts
    143
    Gender
    Female
    Its really silly tho, he found out i had a couple of dates with a guy (didnt work out for me, too soon) now wont let me have our dog when he goes on our damn holiday that we booked together, cancelled my (joint) gym membership and now hates my guts!!!!

    Well thats just peachy!!!!! He wanted out, i was heartbroken NOT him!!! He doesnt love me anymore SO WHATS HIS PROBLEM??????

    Ha, sorry, have exhausted all of my friends by taling about him and crying and ranting over the last few months so just need to get it off my chest here!!

    Thanks guys

  5.  

  6. #5
    Bronze Member SunniDee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    199
    He DOES still love you That's what's probably making him crazy. Not enough to get you back together, but he's still getting over you.

  7. #6
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    580
    Quote Originally Posted by msfoolish View Post
    Ok, i dont get it????? How come my ex hates me now? He broke up with me, i was heartbroken and i had a real hard time dealing with the loss of our relationship.

    In brief:-

    We split up mid feb, i cried, begged pleaded etc and did all the wrong things, then backed off a bit. For a while he kept calling me (drunk) and crying, sayin he missed me blah blah blah and in the morning it was always sorry i'm not in love with you and shouldnt have called. During this time he was seeing someone else and lying about it, so when i found this out I changed my number. i just couldnt stand the pain of the emotional drunk calls which gave me a glimmer of hope, whilst knowing for sure he was with someone else.

    Turns out he was lying to this new girl too saying that i wont leave him alone and cant get over him etc when he was the one to make contact!!! He's still with her i think, but now i hear he's bad mouthing me all over town when he goes out, saying how much he dislikes me and that i'm a stalker etc. I havent even spoken to him since he last called me crying, drunk as usual 4 wks ago. I was the one pleading for him to go NC so i could get over him!!

    Why does he suddenly hate me? I've done nothing to him. I'm just staying away and hoping i'll get over it soon. I hate the thought that he genuinely hates me. Whats with this??? Why would he suddenly hate me??? Why would he say these nasty things when i treated him so well and he was my world, i would have done anything for him and he knows it!!!

    Sorry about this rant but i just dont get it???? Argh!!!! I'm just trying to get over it, thats hard enough without the hate and bad mouthing!!!! Is it to get me to contact him about these rumours, or could he really hate my guts??

    God..what a PATHETIC human being he is and that YOU are rid of.
    These types of posts just make my skin crawl with disgust. He is OBVIOUSLY
    upset that you are not GROVELING for him to come back to him after his PATHETIC attempts to feed you crumbs of hope. Good GOD it's SO transparent. Sweetie, you have done NOTHING to provoke this moronic
    'revenge rampage"..this guy CLEARLY has an ego the size of New YOrk
    to keep this up....just laugh at his pathetic attempts..and keep up the good work on ERASING this LOSER from your life!!!!!!!!
    "What you do speaks so loud I cannot hear a word you say"

    "When I do good, I feel good, when I do bad I feel bad,
    that's my religion"

  8. #7
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    1,596
    You may be wasting alot of energy on someone that seems to be conducting themselves in such an unhealthy manner. He may just be seeking the drama that he seems to need in his life. If you do not react to it, it can cause you no harm.

    On another thread, ScornandTorn wrote, ""shameless people will do what ever they need, no matter how irrational it is, in order to survive emotionally."
    John Bendix is the author of Walking Away from Divorce into Awareness

  9. #8
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    england
    Posts
    143
    Gender
    Female
    Sunnidee,

    He really doesnt love me, he's told me often enough, well that he's not 'in' love with me. Its been awful for me and he knows it! For a long time i thought we would always be together, and that he was the love of my life. I'm just starting to get over it really since i've been in total NC.

    Sweet Venus

    Thanks for your reply, i think you're right and i guess i really didnt know how horrible he really could be until now.

    Thanks for the replies xx

  10. #9
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    england
    Posts
    143
    Gender
    Female
    John Bendix

    I have and am wasting a lot of my thoughts on this guy but i am getiing better, thanks. I'll check out that thread
    X

  11. #10

    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    547
    Just hope you are over him now and free of this loser for good.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Related Articles & Books
by Margarita Nahapetyan
Checking and following the activities of an ex partner through social networking site Facebook can seriously interfere with a person's ability to ...
by Margarita Nahapetyan
Most people get divorced hoping to have a better life and find more happiness than they had in their marriage. However, a new national study by Iowa ...
by Margarita Nahapetyan
Brides who hesitate about getting married might want to consider having second thoughts before starting a life-long commitment, suggest psychologists ...
 

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Expert Advice

Online
CallChat
$4.99/minute
Experienced and compassionate, I will help you through a painful break up or divorce. I am nonjudgmental and an expert in helping people heal their hurts.
Online
Call
$1.75/minute
25+ YEARS EXPERIENCE. Call Now and Feel Better. Compassionate, caring, sound advice. "I felt so much better after talking to Robert" "generously affordable"
Online
CallChat
$3.99/minute
Stop your separation in its tracks! Break up with dignity, and/or Divorce Recovery and Empowerment are my areas of Specialty and Expertise!
Online
CallChat
$1.95/minute
Trust, openness, honesty, gentleness and mutual support are essential requirements for a relationship not just to be viable but for it to create and promote real fulfillment.
Online
Chat
$3.49/minute
Need help moving on? Having a hard time coping with the end of a relationship? Let me help you sort things out and start feeling better.