Red flag? Rude? Something to ignore?

Laura11111 · 05-09-2009, 01:04 PM

Okay...I'm probably over-analyzing here but...

I had a third date with a guy who I still feel like I don't know very well (the first date was almost a blind date and he had a bad cold).

Okay...we watched a movie at his place. Afterwards, he put on his favourite TV show without asking me what I'd like to watch. I laughed a bit during the show because it was funny, then when it was over, he put it to the same show, different episode and said, "sorry, this is my favourite show".

Is that a red flag or is he just used to watching what he wants (from what I gathered, he's been single and hasn't dated much since October). I would expect him to ask me what I'm interested in watching. Rude?

Aside from that, his behaviour has been good. He offered me something to drink and when I chose water, he offered to put it in a glass with ice. Mind you, he didn't offer me anything to eat for the four hours that I was there. He covered me with a blanket when I was cold. He let me choose the movie.

Hmmm...I know, I'm an over-analyzer. Just don't want to miss any signs.

l9grl · 05-09-2009, 01:10 PM

He seems to lack some dating etiquette skills.

Did he even kiss you or hug you or anything to indicate romantic interest?

He seems self-interested. Big time.

Laura11111 · 05-09-2009, 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by l9grl

Did he even kiss you or hug you or anything to indicate romantic interest?

Oh...I should have mentioned. Yes, he was very physically romantic. We cuddled and touched. We also kissed...he's a very good kisser...and we rubbed noses...it was cute.

_Asti_ · 05-09-2009, 01:31 PM

Maybe next time take control and ask to watch a show that you like, mentioning that last time you watched two of his.
Or, if he does it next time, ask to watch something you like afterwards and see what he does...does he let you? Is he ok with that? Or does he want complete control, and doesn't care about what you want?

I don't know if I would say WHOA RED FLAG! He llikes the show and wanted to watch it, sure a simple Do you mind? I really like this show..would have been nice..but he may have just assumed it was ok.
I'd let it go for now, but just keep an eye out for future behaviors of him being selfish and self centered.

JohnnyJr · 05-09-2009, 01:46 PM

IS THIS REALLY HOW GIRLS THINK!?! lol come on relax he was just watching it and seeing if you laughed. If you laugh at his favorite show then he feels like you two have more in common. Relaxxx

now_better · 05-09-2009, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Laura11111

Afterwards, he put on his favourite TV show without asking me what I'd like to watch.

....

He let me choose the movie.

he might not have communicated this properly, but he probably figured you guys would take turns.

i think you guys are being unrealistically hard on this guy. he sounds like a good guy from your brief description.

hersmudders · 05-09-2009, 03:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JohnnyJr

IS THIS REALLY HOW GIRLS THINK!?! lol come on relax he was just watching it and seeing if you laughed. If you laugh at his favorite show then he feels like you two have more in common. Relaxxx

agreed. i think you're over-analyzing. i feel very close to my favorite show and i want people to watch it, so i make them watch it with me, assuming they'll like it as much as i do, without even thinking if they're ok with watching it.

g84 · 05-09-2009, 04:13 PM

I agree that maybe it's over-analyzing things a little bit. Maybe he just wanted to share something that he loves to watch, with you. He may have also been a bit nervous. It's really easy to make little mistakes. I would think that if he treated you nicely and you felt comfortable with him, then there is nothing to worry about. You may do something similar as well without realizing it..keep this in mind as well.

Ariel85 · 05-09-2009, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JohnnyJr

IS THIS REALLY HOW GIRLS THINK!?!

No, it's not. Most of us would have hosed him for being clueless and a total bore.

Shudder · 05-09-2009, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ariel85

No, it's not. Most of us would have hosed him for being clueless and a total bore.

no wonder people have such a hard time dating these days....

05-09-2009, 01:04 PM	#1
Laura11111 Offline Silver Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Ontario, Canada Gender: Female Age: 26 Posts: 415	Red flag? Rude? Something to ignore? Okay...I'm probably over-analyzing here but... I had a third date with a guy who I still feel like I don't know very well (the first date was almost a blind date and he had a bad cold). Okay...we watched a movie at his place. Afterwards, he put on his favourite TV show without asking me what I'd like to watch. I laughed a bit during the show because it was funny, then when it was over, he put it to the same show, different episode and said, "sorry, this is my favourite show". Is that a red flag or is he just used to watching what he wants (from what I gathered, he's been single and hasn't dated much since October). I would expect him to ask me what I'm interested in watching. Rude? Aside from that, his behaviour has been good. He offered me something to drink and when I chose water, he offered to put it in a glass with ice. Mind you, he didn't offer me anything to eat for the four hours that I was there. He covered me with a blanket when I was cold. He let me choose the movie. Hmmm...I know, I'm an over-analyzer. Just don't want to miss any signs.

05-09-2009, 01:31 PM	#4
_Asti_ Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Gender: Female Age: 23 Posts: 2,354	Maybe next time take control and ask to watch a show that you like, mentioning that last time you watched two of his. Or, if he does it next time, ask to watch something you like afterwards and see what he does...does he let you? Is he ok with that? Or does he want complete control, and doesn't care about what you want? I don't know if I would say WHOA RED FLAG! He llikes the show and wanted to watch it, sure a simple Do you mind? I really like this show..would have been nice..but he may have just assumed it was ok. I'd let it go for now, but just keep an eye out for future behaviors of him being selfish and self centered. __________________ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ __________________ I got so much love For you darlin' and I, I wanna let you know how I feel And it's true that I love you And it's true your the only one and I do, I adore you And it's true You make me feel alive ___________________

05-09-2009, 04:13 PM	#8
g84 Online Gold Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Canada Gender: Female Age: 25 Posts: 680	I agree that maybe it's over-analyzing things a little bit. Maybe he just wanted to share something that he loves to watch, with you. He may have also been a bit nervous. It's really easy to make little mistakes. I would think that if he treated you nicely and you felt comfortable with him, then there is nothing to worry about. You may do something similar as well without realizing it..keep this in mind as well. __________________ non posso continuare così.. ho paura. Rain: fall hard. My eyes may close, but I'll stand like a statue.

05-09-2009, 01:10 PM	#2
l9grl Offline Silver Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 502	He seems to lack some dating etiquette skills. Did he even kiss you or hug you or anything to indicate romantic interest? He seems self-interested. Big time.

05-09-2009, 01:46 PM	#5
JohnnyJr Offline Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Western New York Gender: Male Posts: 29	IS THIS REALLY HOW GIRLS THINK!?! lol come on relax he was just watching it and seeing if you laughed. If you laugh at his favorite show then he feels like you two have more in common. Relaxxx