My Stepdad is such a jerk

Mariahee · 02-21-2009, 12:21 PM

I was talking to my grandma on skype outside on my laptop (i'd be in my room, but i was in the middle of eating cake, which i can't eat in my room, and i wanted to talk to her alone so i went outside)

Right in the middle he barges outside yelling at me about not being properly dressed because it was cold outside, and how i was being stupid (he only cares about me not getting sick so he wont have to pay for my doctor bill, and so that my mom wont spend attention on me instead of him)

And i got mad at him and told him to go away, i don't even care about him yelling at me to put more clothes on, but the fact that he was doing it when my grandma could hear everything, he even said "i don't care that she could hear" that got me so offended, because he has no manners what so ever, whenever my family argues with someone they do it in private. He is so stupid, whenever he argues with me or my mom, he never cares if its in front of total strangers. For example, when we were moving into the new house, he all of a sudden started arguing with my mom right in front of the furniture moving men, that is so inconsiderate, why is he so dumb doesn't care if he has an audience when in an argument?

I really hate him for calling me stupid, there are alot of things i'd like to call him, but i choose not to because i don't want even more conflict, and having my nerves ruined. I'd love to tell him how without the money he makes to pay for the house, and for my moms college, he'd be totally useless. And its not like me and my mom were goldigging for him or anything, he used to be nice, before my mom married him and we started living together, apparently that's the time to show your true side.

Im 17 in 11th grade, and i am just about ready to get a job, earn money, and get out of there. Fortunately, he will be working in another state in a few months, and ill hardly ever see him, or have my nerves ruined, or have him whining at me about everything i do wrong.

Until then, how do i make sure that my relations with him go as smooth as possible, without the least bit of arguing?

Butterfly~Wrists · 02-21-2009, 12:49 PM

ignore him. comply with what he says and be totally passive. But then, you shouldn't have to. But stress free.
What I normally do is yell and fight back, not the best idea in the world to be honest.

Mariahee · 02-21-2009, 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Butterfly~Wrists

ignore him. comply with what he says and be totally passive. But then, you shouldn't have to. But stress free.
What I normally do is yell and fight back, not the best idea in the world to be honest.

Thanks, that what i used to do also, but its really no use fighting with him, since he thinks he's such a genuis at winning arguments (in his own mind)

Butterfly~Wrists · 02-21-2009, 12:59 PM

Yeah, same as my mums boyfriend. Although I have gotten physical with him. But then my mums on my side, sometimes.... :/, not often though.
So yeah, passive is probably best, and then vent and scream at us here.

Mariahee · 02-21-2009, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Butterfly~Wrists

Yeah, same as my mums boyfriend. Although I have gotten physical with him. But then my mums on my side, sometimes.... :/, not often though.
So yeah, passive is probably best, and then vent and scream at us here.

awww, thanks <3, that made me feel much better

Butterfly~Wrists · 02-21-2009, 01:03 PM

Oh, something else I;ve done, which could work, is totally ignore them, offer to make mum a drink and not him etc. but thats aggressive, in the non traditional sense, if he really does annoy you and u dont wanna yelling match

Mariahee · 02-21-2009, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Butterfly~Wrists

Oh, something else I;ve done, which could work, is totally ignore them, offer to make mum a drink and not him etc. but thats aggressive, in the non traditional sense, if he really does annoy you and u dont wanna yelling match

I'd rather not do that, he already thinks that i'm always agressive with him, when im really not. Like he thought i was giving him bad looks and glaring at him, when i was just squinting cause i didn't have contacts on. or when im downstairs making lunch, he thinks i slam the microwave on purpose to distract him, when how can you close a microwave w/o making a slamming noise? seriously

**BellaDonna** · 02-21-2009, 01:39 PM

I'm sorry to hear this.

Are you close with your grandma? Any way you can live with her?

Quote:

Right in the middle he barges outside yelling at me about not being properly dressed because it was cold outside, and how i was being stupid

If it were me, I'd probably say "No. I'm not stupid" very calmly, and that's it.

You should not let him put you down- but at the same time, steer clar because he sounds like a timb bomb waiting to go off. However I don't think you should just sit there and take being called stupid.

Has he ever been physically abusive to anyone?

Mariahee · 02-21-2009, 02:29 PM

no, he's not abusive he's just a big doushebag

o, and no, my grandma lives in Ukraine

02-21-2009, 12:21 PM	#1
Mariahee Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 132	My Stepdad is such a jerk I was talking to my grandma on skype outside on my laptop (i'd be in my room, but i was in the middle of eating cake, which i can't eat in my room, and i wanted to talk to her alone so i went outside) Right in the middle he barges outside yelling at me about not being properly dressed because it was cold outside, and how i was being stupid (he only cares about me not getting sick so he wont have to pay for my doctor bill, and so that my mom wont spend attention on me instead of him) And i got mad at him and told him to go away, i don't even care about him yelling at me to put more clothes on, but the fact that he was doing it when my grandma could hear everything, he even said "i don't care that she could hear" that got me so offended, because he has no manners what so ever, whenever my family argues with someone they do it in private. He is so stupid, whenever he argues with me or my mom, he never cares if its in front of total strangers. For example, when we were moving into the new house, he all of a sudden started arguing with my mom right in front of the furniture moving men, that is so inconsiderate, why is he so dumb doesn't care if he has an audience when in an argument? I really hate him for calling me stupid, there are alot of things i'd like to call him, but i choose not to because i don't want even more conflict, and having my nerves ruined. I'd love to tell him how without the money he makes to pay for the house, and for my moms college, he'd be totally useless. And its not like me and my mom were goldigging for him or anything, he used to be nice, before my mom married him and we started living together, apparently that's the time to show your true side. Im 17 in 11th grade, and i am just about ready to get a job, earn money, and get out of there. Fortunately, he will be working in another state in a few months, and ill hardly ever see him, or have my nerves ruined, or have him whining at me about everything i do wrong. Until then, how do i make sure that my relations with him go as smooth as possible, without the least bit of arguing? __________________ http://unremarkableblog.blogspot.com/

02-21-2009, 02:29 PM	#9
Mariahee Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 132	no, he's not abusive he's just a big doushebag o, and no, my grandma lives in Ukraine __________________ http://unremarkableblog.blogspot.com/

02-21-2009, 12:49 PM	#2
Butterfly~Wrists Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 1,652	ignore him. comply with what he says and be totally passive. But then, you shouldn't have to. But stress free. What I normally do is yell and fight back, not the best idea in the world to be honest.

02-21-2009, 12:59 PM	#4
Butterfly~Wrists Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 1,652	Yeah, same as my mums boyfriend. Although I have gotten physical with him. But then my mums on my side, sometimes.... :/, not often though. So yeah, passive is probably best, and then vent and scream at us here.

02-21-2009, 01:03 PM	#6
Butterfly~Wrists Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 1,652	Oh, something else I;ve done, which could work, is totally ignore them, offer to make mum a drink and not him etc. but thats aggressive, in the non traditional sense, if he really does annoy you and u dont wanna yelling match