Nature vs nurture/ psychology vs genes

1WayTicket2Norway · 11-22-2008, 10:45 AM

When I first became aware of my homosexuality, i desperately tried to fight my urges, but then finally accepted it as being part of who i am, and that i was probably born with it. I did have strong transgendered tendencies at a very early age after all, so i thought that this was the only logical explanation... or so i thought...

When i finally came out to my parents, to my surprise they had a little story to tell me of their own. Apparantly, before i went to kindergarten, i was a normal healthy little boy. I didn't cross dress, and i didn't have any feminine tendencies and i gladly participated in masculine activities. i did however, have an unusually tight bond with my mother. My dad explained that this was due to the fact that he devoted all his time to my older brother who has down syndrome (he required almost more attention than i did, so my parents split the work load), which left room for me to develop a close relationship with my mother.

And then the day I had to go to kindergarten everything changed. The first day i had to go i refused to leave the car and and i suffered terrible separation anxiety. When the day ended and i finally went home, my parents walked in on me wearing my mothers clothes and shoes and according to my parents i have behaved like a girl ever since. For some reason i identified with the wrong gender. During my early teens i did managed to correct my behaviour driven by my fathers harsh conditioning. he made it very clear that what i was doing was wrong, so i guess i just decided to become a boy, with the occsional cross dressing incident. And then surprise surprise, i found out that i was gay.

So, what i want is an opinion... is it possible that a childhood event could have developed my sexuality? Nature vs nurture... what do you guys think?

Nurseman · 11-22-2008, 11:10 AM

People have been trying to figure out what causes homosexuality for a very long time. They haven't got it yet.

IMHO, I think there are numerous reason people come to find themselves attracted to (and fall in love with) people of the same sex. I really don't think there is a single uniform answer.

And who bloody-well cares? You are gay? Good for you. Happiness is where you find it. If it's with another man, so be it. I wish I could find some happiness with SOMEBODY. I sometimes get very bitter about that.

Again, good for you.

chiefoptimizer · 11-22-2008, 11:23 AM

still open to debate, but there's mounting evidence that sexual orientation is set before or soon after birth.

the reason is that a certain part of the hypothalamus lights up in an mri scanner when a gay men is shown erotic pictures of men and not of women, and vice versa.

the structures in the hypothalamus are built before birth and are completed soon after.

there was a bbc documentary by John Barrowman on this. also, there have been several papers in medical journals about it.

as far as we know, there's no way to change a person's sexual orientation. several ex-gays and repressed homophobic statesmen and clergymen are regularly caught giving in to their homosexual urges.

yeawutever · 11-22-2008, 11:55 AM

I don't think that an event has to do with changing your sexual preference. You may had always had it within you but it was repress or block out (in other words you always had that trait) but it was only a matter of time before it came out.

Day_Walker · 11-22-2008, 02:04 PM

I think that both nature and nurture CAN influence a persons sexual preference. Either way you like what you like. Finding the source of something feels like it will give us insight and allow us to understand but that is not necessarily true. Regardless of the source, be true to yourself and be happy with the person that you are.

bear12 · 11-24-2008, 12:22 AM

who knows. but really, homosexuality has been around for ages, and in the grand scheme of the world, it's really only in more modern times that we've thought of it as counter-culture or "wrong" in some way. (at leat as far as men go- i know far less about lesbian relationships in the ancient world, but i'd guess they probably existed too!)

i tend to believe that everyone's sexuality falls along a spectrum and that very few people are either 100% gay or straight. with that said, i think culture does ahve a lot to do with it, and i maintain that if having homosexual relationships was more a part of our standard culture, more people would do it. (i was shocked, for example, when my super super conservative bff who is always talking about men, etc, got drunk one night and said she's attracted to men, but would date women if it were socially acceptable... ) hmmm...

jon 13 · 11-24-2008, 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bear12

i tend to believe that everyone's sexuality falls along a spectrum and that very few people are either 100% gay or straight. with that said, i think culture does ahve a lot to do with it, and i maintain that if having homosexual relationships was more a part of our standard culture, more people would do it. (i was shocked, for example, when my super super conservative bff who is always talking about men, etc, got drunk one night and said she's attracted to men, but would date women if it were socially acceptable... ) hmmm...

" but would date women if it were socially acceptable..."
she's already attracted to women whether or not it's acceptable... it's just that she isn't open about it.

another way of putting it, it's the difference between someone living in the closet or not, not determining sexual attraction.

lukeb · 11-24-2008, 08:11 PM

The cause for heterosexuality is being born with a larger hypothalamus than gay people.

icemotoboy · 11-24-2008, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lukeb

The cause for heterosexuality is being born with a larger hypothalamus than gay people.

The cause of ignorance, however, remains entirely linked with those who listen blindly to everything they see on TV

chiefoptimizer · 11-25-2008, 04:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by icemotoboy

The cause of ignorance, however, remains entirely linked with those who listen blindly to everything they see on TV

or those who disbelieve everything they don't like on tv

[Only registered and activated users can see links. ]

11-22-2008, 10:45 AM	#1
1WayTicket2Norway Offline Silver Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Australia Gender: Male Age: 19 Posts: 412	Nature vs nurture/ psychology vs genes When I first became aware of my homosexuality, i desperately tried to fight my urges, but then finally accepted it as being part of who i am, and that i was probably born with it. I did have strong transgendered tendencies at a very early age after all, so i thought that this was the only logical explanation... or so i thought... When i finally came out to my parents, to my surprise they had a little story to tell me of their own. Apparantly, before i went to kindergarten, i was a normal healthy little boy. I didn't cross dress, and i didn't have any feminine tendencies and i gladly participated in masculine activities. i did however, have an unusually tight bond with my mother. My dad explained that this was due to the fact that he devoted all his time to my older brother who has down syndrome (he required almost more attention than i did, so my parents split the work load), which left room for me to develop a close relationship with my mother. And then the day I had to go to kindergarten everything changed. The first day i had to go i refused to leave the car and and i suffered terrible separation anxiety. When the day ended and i finally went home, my parents walked in on me wearing my mothers clothes and shoes and according to my parents i have behaved like a girl ever since. For some reason i identified with the wrong gender. During my early teens i did managed to correct my behaviour driven by my fathers harsh conditioning. he made it very clear that what i was doing was wrong, so i guess i just decided to become a boy, with the occsional cross dressing incident. And then surprise surprise, i found out that i was gay. So, what i want is an opinion... is it possible that a childhood event could have developed my sexuality? Nature vs nurture... what do you guys think?

11-22-2008, 11:23 AM	#3
chiefoptimizer Offline Silver Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Exeter Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 487	still open to debate, but there's mounting evidence that sexual orientation is set before or soon after birth. the reason is that a certain part of the hypothalamus lights up in an mri scanner when a gay men is shown erotic pictures of men and not of women, and vice versa. the structures in the hypothalamus are built before birth and are completed soon after. there was a bbc documentary by John Barrowman on this. also, there have been several papers in medical journals about it. as far as we know, there's no way to change a person's sexual orientation. several ex-gays and repressed homophobic statesmen and clergymen are regularly caught giving in to their homosexual urges. __________________ There is no fate but what we make!

11-22-2008, 11:55 AM	#4
yeawutever Online Platinum Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Gender: None Specified Age: 22 Posts: 5,671	I don't think that an event has to do with changing your sexual preference. You may had always had it within you but it was repress or block out (in other words you always had that trait) but it was only a matter of time before it came out. __________________ Opened-minded to those in need of help. Not everything is black and white as it seems.... If you're gonna do something, think twice and make sure it's something worthy that you don't later on regret!!!!!!!!!!! Still in a LDR with boyfriend.

11-22-2008, 02:04 PM	#5
Day_Walker Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: California Gender: Male Age: 28 Posts: 4,882	I think that both nature and nurture CAN influence a persons sexual preference. Either way you like what you like. Finding the source of something feels like it will give us insight and allow us to understand but that is not necessarily true. Regardless of the source, be true to yourself and be happy with the person that you are. __________________ "A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong gives it the superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom. But the tumult soon subsides. Time makes more converts than reason." Thomas Paine "The wise man questions others wisdom because he questions his own, the foolish man because it is different from his own." Leo Stein

11-22-2008, 11:10 AM	#2
Nurseman Offline Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Virginia Gender: Male Age: 49 Posts: 321	People have been trying to figure out what causes homosexuality for a very long time. They haven't got it yet. IMHO, I think there are numerous reason people come to find themselves attracted to (and fall in love with) people of the same sex. I really don't think there is a single uniform answer. And who bloody-well cares? You are gay? Good for you. Happiness is where you find it. If it's with another man, so be it. I wish I could find some happiness with SOMEBODY. I sometimes get very bitter about that. Again, good for you.

11-24-2008, 12:22 AM	#6
bear12 Offline Silver Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Gender: Female Age: 27 Posts: 680	who knows. but really, homosexuality has been around for ages, and in the grand scheme of the world, it's really only in more modern times that we've thought of it as counter-culture or "wrong" in some way. (at leat as far as men go- i know far less about lesbian relationships in the ancient world, but i'd guess they probably existed too!) i tend to believe that everyone's sexuality falls along a spectrum and that very few people are either 100% gay or straight. with that said, i think culture does ahve a lot to do with it, and i maintain that if having homosexual relationships was more a part of our standard culture, more people would do it. (i was shocked, for example, when my super super conservative bff who is always talking about men, etc, got drunk one night and said she's attracted to men, but would date women if it were socially acceptable... ) hmmm...

11-24-2008, 08:11 PM	#8
lukeb Offline Gold Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Alberta, Canada Gender: Male Age: 44 Posts: 703	The cause for heterosexuality is being born with a larger hypothalamus than gay people.