Depressed

civilservant · 05-11-2008, 06:44 AM

I've never been one to label myself, I hate the fact that I feel this way and I don't want too, but I can't seem to see a way out of it.

Every morning when I wake up she's the first thing I think of, and the last thing I think of when I do to bed. I know it's a relativly new break up, but it's hurting alot at the moment. It's not just that though, I have alot on my plate at work, and I cannot seem to see an end to everything.

I'm struggling to find a reason to get up in the morning, I'm not sleeping more than 2 hours at a time, and I'm not eating unless I force myself. I can see myself fallig into this well of self deprecation and hatred, and it's not somewhere I want to be. I hate the way I am, and just want to not wake up in the morning.

I'm not contemplating suicide, I just wish the days would go by in a blur so that I wouldn't have to find the motivation, because I haven't got any at all. It's exsisting, not living, and as I sit here I literally count down the hours until I can go back to sleep.

I'm not looking for an answer, or comments per se, I just needed to get this out.

Dako · 05-11-2008, 11:15 AM

Nothing slows time like heartbreak. Keeping active helped me. Endless walks outside, stopping to pet dogs, drink coffee and hanging out at public places to stay away from four walls.

Time will pass, and you'll once again feel joy.

itsallgrand · 05-11-2008, 02:45 PM

I certainly hope you feel better soon. To get some sleep, some good food into you, and a chance to appreciate the spring sunshine.

It will get better. These things always pass, sometimes just not soon enough for liking.

tc

civilservant · 05-13-2008, 03:31 AM

Well I went to the doctor, and he's signed me off for 2 weeks and given me some anti-depressants. I'm very wary of taking them, but I have started anyway. The 2 weeks off from work will be good, time to get away from her and reflect on what I need to do with the rest of my life.

I do wonder how I got this way, and why a women managed to drag me down so far, but I suppose it'll all be better in a couple of weeks. I'll stay on here to get advice and support from you good people, but from now it's a mission to keep myself busy.

itsallgrand · 05-13-2008, 03:54 PM

Wow, way to move on that! That's excellent news that you got some time off work.

There are all kinds of people here (and elsewhere) who swear by anti-depressants and how much they helped them get out of some real dark places. To get back to living again.

Thanks for the update. Good to know you are relatively ok.

Somerandomguy82 · 05-13-2008, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by civilservant

Well I went to the doctor, and he's signed me off for 2 weeks and given me some anti-depressants. I'm very wary of taking them, but I have started anyway. The 2 weeks off from work will be good, time to get away from her and reflect on what I need to do with the rest of my life.

I do wonder how I got this way, and why a women managed to drag me down so far, but I suppose it'll all be better in a couple of weeks. I'll stay on here to get advice and support from you good people, but from now it's a mission to keep myself busy.

God, I wish I'd thought of that. I was such a disaster at work throughout the many breakups I had with my ex. People I worked with at the time must have thought I was insane. My phone and e-mail were non-stop sources of misery when I tried to do no contact with her. I still get really down for about everything that happened between her and I and some of the lovely things she says about me. It's been months and months and she's since moved on with someone else.

It just takes time. Apparently some breakups take longer than others to recover from. Apparently some people also recover faster than others.

Make sure you keep yourself busy during those 2 weeks. I completely lose it when I have too much (or sometimes any) time on my hands. Good luck!

eurocar · 05-13-2008, 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by civilservant

Well I went to the doctor, and he's signed me off for 2 weeks and given me some anti-depressants. I'm very wary of taking them, but I have started anyway. The 2 weeks off from work will be good, time to get away from her and reflect on what I need to do with the rest of my life.

I do wonder how I got this way, and why a women managed to drag me down so far, but I suppose it'll all be better in a couple of weeks. I'll stay on here to get advice and support from you good people, but from now it's a mission to keep myself busy.

While it may seem like the easier route, I would contend that it may not be such a great idea to take those two weeks off of work. Keeping your mind engaged in other pursuits is absolutely critical to the healing process, and work is, for better or worse, a great way to do that. I might reconsider.

But, on a side note, it's pretty sweet you guys can just get "signed off" of work. Here, it has to be pretty serious. Not that your situation isn't--but I'm talking a death in the immediate family, etc.

civilservant · 05-14-2008, 05:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eurocar

While it may seem like the easier route, I would contend that it may not be such a great idea to take those two weeks off of work. Keeping your mind engaged in other pursuits is absolutely critical to the healing process, and work is, for better or worse, a great way to do that. I might reconsider.

Were she not at work with me, I would agree, however seeing her at work everyday isn't going to help me move on is it? I'm keeping myself busy over the next 2 weeks, I've got DIY and I'm going to keep myself plenty busy and occupied.

Quote:

But, on a side note, it's pretty sweet you guys can just get "signed off" of work. Here, it has to be pretty serious. Not that your situation isn't--but I'm talking a death in the immediate family, etc.

Well the Doctor has issued a note saying that I'm unfit for work, and they can't really argue with that can they? In fact legally if you have a note stating this they legally CANNOT let you work unless you are signed back on by the same doctor.

eurocar · 05-14-2008, 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by civilservant

Were she not at work with me, I would agree, however seeing her at work everyday isn't going to help me move on is it? I'm keeping myself busy over the next 2 weeks, I've got DIY and I'm going to keep myself plenty busy and occupied.

I didn't know you worked together; that's a whole different story, I suppose.

05-11-2008, 06:44 AM	#1
civilservant Offline Gold Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: UK Gender: Male Age: 25 Posts: 1,055	Depressed I've never been one to label myself, I hate the fact that I feel this way and I don't want too, but I can't seem to see a way out of it. Every morning when I wake up she's the first thing I think of, and the last thing I think of when I do to bed. I know it's a relativly new break up, but it's hurting alot at the moment. It's not just that though, I have alot on my plate at work, and I cannot seem to see an end to everything. I'm struggling to find a reason to get up in the morning, I'm not sleeping more than 2 hours at a time, and I'm not eating unless I force myself. I can see myself fallig into this well of self deprecation and hatred, and it's not somewhere I want to be. I hate the way I am, and just want to not wake up in the morning. I'm not contemplating suicide, I just wish the days would go by in a blur so that I wouldn't have to find the motivation, because I haven't got any at all. It's exsisting, not living, and as I sit here I literally count down the hours until I can go back to sleep. I'm not looking for an answer, or comments per se, I just needed to get this out. __________________ "To be upset over what you don't have, is to waste what you do have" ~ Anon "Don't have a battle of wits with an unarmed oppenent" ~ Anon "A real leader faces the music, even if he dosen't like the tune" ~ Anon

05-11-2008, 02:45 PM	#3
itsallgrand Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: following my grace... Gender: None Specified Posts: 6,790	I certainly hope you feel better soon. To get some sleep, some good food into you, and a chance to appreciate the spring sunshine. It will get better. These things always pass, sometimes just not soon enough for liking. tc __________________ "The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off." Mal Pancoast

05-13-2008, 03:31 AM	#4
civilservant Offline Gold Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: UK Gender: Male Age: 25 Posts: 1,055	Well I went to the doctor, and he's signed me off for 2 weeks and given me some anti-depressants. I'm very wary of taking them, but I have started anyway. The 2 weeks off from work will be good, time to get away from her and reflect on what I need to do with the rest of my life. I do wonder how I got this way, and why a women managed to drag me down so far, but I suppose it'll all be better in a couple of weeks. I'll stay on here to get advice and support from you good people, but from now it's a mission to keep myself busy. __________________ "To be upset over what you don't have, is to waste what you do have" ~ Anon "Don't have a battle of wits with an unarmed oppenent" ~ Anon "A real leader faces the music, even if he dosen't like the tune" ~ Anon

05-13-2008, 03:54 PM	#5
itsallgrand Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: following my grace... Gender: None Specified Posts: 6,790	Wow, way to move on that! That's excellent news that you got some time off work. There are all kinds of people here (and elsewhere) who swear by anti-depressants and how much they helped them get out of some real dark places. To get back to living again. Thanks for the update. Good to know you are relatively ok. __________________ "The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off." Mal Pancoast

05-11-2008, 11:15 AM	#2
Dako Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Gender: None Specified Posts: 9,115	Nothing slows time like heartbreak. Keeping active helped me. Endless walks outside, stopping to pet dogs, drink coffee and hanging out at public places to stay away from four walls. Time will pass, and you'll once again feel joy.