Has anyone here adopted a kid before?

iwishiknew · 04-16-2008, 11:57 PM

How many have adopted a kid before? If so how were the results? I would like have a kid in the future but I doubt I would have any of my own and I was thinking about adoption but not to sure about it.

geadrops · 04-17-2008, 12:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by iwishiknew

How many have adopted a kid before? If so how were the results? I would like have a kid in the future but I doubt I would have any of my own and I was thinking about adoption but not to sure about it.

That is a hilarious post dude ! Are you really serious, you want to adopt a kid at 26 ?? that makes absolutely no sense at all.

**lady00** · 04-17-2008, 12:17 AM

I also don't get why it's funny. I think it's a serious question.

**Hope75** · 04-17-2008, 12:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geadrops

That is a hilarious post dude ! Are you really serious, you want to adopt a kid at 26 ?? that makes absolutely no sense at all.

I'm also missing the humor in this.

To the OP- have you considered contacting some adoption agencies for information?

big greg · 04-17-2008, 03:14 AM

I've decided to do this if I end up approaching 30 years of age and haven't met anyone to have kids with. I've actually researched it alot, and talked to alot of different people from agencies, etc. Single parent adoptions are becoming more and more popular. There are some catches, though. No one will consider you if you don't have a stable life together.... like a stable job, stable income, stable living situation, and alot of money put back. If you have all of that, then they want you to have a "support network", which is friends or family close by who can help you out raising the child if you run into problems. If you have all of that, it will be easy to adpot as a single male parent.

Also, consider the age of the child you want to adopt, and how that will affect your work and income. If you adopt an infant, you will need to take leave from work and care for the child 24/7. It's hard to have money come in while caring for a child unless you have a bunch saved up (the people I talked to said that around 50k would be about what they look for). If you want to adopt one a little older, they aren't as strict in the selection process. It will be easier as a single parent to raise a child that is able to walk and talk, and one that you don't have to nurture as an infant.

Lastly, consider whether or not you want to adopt domestically or internationally. International adoptions are way more $$, and take longer, and are strung with issues about the country's policy on foreign abortion. Some countries won't let people from other countries adopt. Also, single parents adoptions from other countries are low in numbers, as other countries are usually way more strict than here in the states, and they usually never consider single parent adoptions (Especially male).

Hope this helps, your best bet would be to just find some local agencies and call them and talk to them about what you are thinking... and they will give you the best course of action to prepare yourself. All the people I talked to admired and respected my plan for adopting as a single parent if I don't find a partner, and they all welcomed the idea. I totally feel where you're coming from, too. The chances are grim that I will find a partner, and having children is something I don't want to deprive myself of if I can't find anyone. Don't want to miss out on having a family of my own.

Excalibur · 04-17-2008, 10:55 AM

Parenting is not about having someone to love, adore, and obey you.

It's you having the obligation, responsiblity and requirement to make the "smal adult" who's perception of self and life is not yet formed....into someone that knows they are capable of meeting the chlalenge of successin life on life's terms by their own efforts.

Adoption standards to become a parent can't be imposed in the tranditional method of conception - but they should be!

You have to be financial secure, professionally established, you have to have a support network for assistance in raising the child - because tragedy could strike you.

RelaxByWater84 · 04-17-2008, 11:12 AM

You might have more trouble adopting being that you are male. I know one agency that will put single males through a lot of background checks. Unfortunately for you some males adopted girls for other purposes than giving them a good home.

big greg · 04-17-2008, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mythical_Suicide

Actually you would be surprised at how much easier it is to adopt a child from another country than it is to adopt a child in the States. Also, the number of single parents who adopt from other countries is alot higher because they don't have the strict policies of that here in the States.

Where are you getting your stats from? Everybody and every agency I talked to told me that it's the other countries laws about adoption that cause the problems, and that some of their cultures don't believe in single parent adoption so they hardly ever consider it. It's also more difficult because it costs alot more than domestic adoption, and you have to travel internationally and sometimes stay in the country of adoption for a period of time while they legalize it over there.

iwishiknew · 04-18-2008, 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geadrops

That is a hilarious post dude ! Are you really serious, you want to adopt a kid at 26 ?? that makes absolutely no sense at all.

lol, I do not want to adapt a kid that is 26 yrs old, I am talking about a kid that is 2 to 6 years old.

04-16-2008, 11:57 PM	#1
iwishiknew Offline Silver Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Illinois Gender: Male Age: 31 Posts: 1,231	Has anyone here adopted a kid before? How many have adopted a kid before? If so how were the results? I would like have a kid in the future but I doubt I would have any of my own and I was thinking about adoption but not to sure about it. __________________ "Some people more than others judge people by their looks, moreover attractiveness probably most affects first impressions" (Livingston) "To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the Gift." "I am an ugly duckling"

04-17-2008, 03:14 AM	#5
big greg Offline Silver Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: my cave Gender: Male Age: 25 Posts: 364	I've decided to do this if I end up approaching 30 years of age and haven't met anyone to have kids with. I've actually researched it alot, and talked to alot of different people from agencies, etc. Single parent adoptions are becoming more and more popular. There are some catches, though. No one will consider you if you don't have a stable life together.... like a stable job, stable income, stable living situation, and alot of money put back. If you have all of that, then they want you to have a "support network", which is friends or family close by who can help you out raising the child if you run into problems. If you have all of that, it will be easy to adpot as a single male parent. Also, consider the age of the child you want to adopt, and how that will affect your work and income. If you adopt an infant, you will need to take leave from work and care for the child 24/7. It's hard to have money come in while caring for a child unless you have a bunch saved up (the people I talked to said that around 50k would be about what they look for). If you want to adopt one a little older, they aren't as strict in the selection process. It will be easier as a single parent to raise a child that is able to walk and talk, and one that you don't have to nurture as an infant. Lastly, consider whether or not you want to adopt domestically or internationally. International adoptions are way more $$, and take longer, and are strung with issues about the country's policy on foreign abortion. Some countries won't let people from other countries adopt. Also, single parents adoptions from other countries are low in numbers, as other countries are usually way more strict than here in the states, and they usually never consider single parent adoptions (Especially male). Hope this helps, your best bet would be to just find some local agencies and call them and talk to them about what you are thinking... and they will give you the best course of action to prepare yourself. All the people I talked to admired and respected my plan for adopting as a single parent if I don't find a partner, and they all welcomed the idea. I totally feel where you're coming from, too. The chances are grim that I will find a partner, and having children is something I don't want to deprive myself of if I can't find anyone. Don't want to miss out on having a family of my own. __________________ I eat my peas with honey, I've done it all my life. It makes my peas taste funny, but it sticks them to my knife. Last edited by big greg; 04-17-2008 at 03:19 AM.

04-17-2008, 11:12 AM	#7
RelaxByWater84 Offline Silver Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: In the Now Gender: Female Age: 25 Posts: 923	You might have more trouble adopting being that you are male. I know one agency that will put single males through a lot of background checks. Unfortunately for you some males adopted girls for other purposes than giving them a good home. __________________ Now caught in a waltz With the eternal dancer I'm courted by death But death isn't the answer I say. Beethoven's Last Night Trans-Siberian Orchestra

04-17-2008, 12:17 AM	#3
lady00 Offline Super Moderator Join Date: May 2004 Gender: Female Age: 25 Posts: 7,867	I also don't get why it's funny. I think it's a serious question.

04-17-2008, 10:55 AM	#6
Excalibur Offline Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 1,651	Parenting is not about having someone to love, adore, and obey you. It's you having the obligation, responsiblity and requirement to make the "smal adult" who's perception of self and life is not yet formed....into someone that knows they are capable of meeting the chlalenge of successin life on life's terms by their own efforts. Adoption standards to become a parent can't be imposed in the tranditional method of conception - but they should be! You have to be financial secure, professionally established, you have to have a support network for assistance in raising the child - because tragedy could strike you.