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  1. #1
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    When friends hang up on you

    This has happened to me a lot. In my mind it's very disrespectful to hang up on someone and it's a rare day when I will do such a thing.

    Last night I was talking to my girlfriend and politics came up and she hung up on me. It was only the day before I learned that she is pretty much the polar opposite on things. Anyway, she sent me an email saying she knows I'm passionate about politics but she would like me to respect the fact she isn't and doesn't want to hear about it. Basically, she's concerned about the price of gas and doesn't care about the death in the war being suffered. I sent her an email saying that I was sorry too as I value her friendship so much, but that death for me is too hard to ignore.

    Then she has this new BF that she is wondering if she should just bite the bullet and make it work (as in marry him within a year's time). Half the time she says he's a bum (more or less) and the other half of the time she thinks he's so nice. I've kept my mouth shut about what I really think, but I just wish she'd lose the guy and find someone more appropriate. I guess what I'm saying is if she marrys this guy our friendship will probably go by the wayside anyway.

    Who's right here and more importantly, I always question a friendship when the other person hangs up on me. Thoughts? Thanks.
    Last edited by Anotherday; 04-01-2008 at 09:41 AM.

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  3. #2
    Super Moderator agent's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anotherday View Post
    This has happened to me a lot. In my mind it's very disrespectful to hang up on someone and it's a rare day when I will do such a thing.

    Last night I was talking to my girlfriend and politics came up and she hung up on me. It was only the day before I learned that she is pretty much the polar opposite on things. Anyway, she sent me an email saying she knows I'm passionate about politics but she would like me to respect the fact she isn't and doesn't want to hear about it. Basically, she's concerned about the price of gas and doesn't care about the death in the war being suffered. I sent her an email saying that I was sorry too as I value her friendship so much, but that death for me is too hard to ignore.

    Who's right here and more importantly, I always question a friendship when the other person hangs up on me. Thoughts? Thanks.
    I too would question a friendship wher the other person felt ok in hanging up on me. Actually, I wouldn't. They would be gone.

    But I have to ask - you say you feel this happens a lot to you, so either you make friends with people who have no problem hanging up on you, or you are behaving in a way that makes them hang up on you.

    Your friend used the word passionate? That's a good word for strong feeling, but when you talk about things you are passionate about do you tend to let those feelings dictate the way you talk about things? It obviously stops you taking into account your friends disinterest in the topic.

    Also, the e-mail was quite manipulative.
    By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. - Confucius

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  4. #3
    Platinum Member Dako's Avatar
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    Sounds like you were on a roll with your opinions, and she wasn't in the mood for it. I sometimes get tired of hearing about the war but I still care.
    << Vigilance.

  5. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by agent View Post
    I too would question a friendship wher the other person felt ok in hanging up on me. Actually, I wouldn't. They would be gone.

    But I have to ask - you say you feel this happens a lot to you, so either you make friends with people who have no problem hanging up on you, or you are behaving in a way that makes them hang up on you.

    Your friend used the word passionate? That's a good word for strong feeling, but when you talk about things you are passionate about do you tend to let those feelings dictate the way you talk about things? It obviously stops you taking into account your friends disinterest in the topic.

    Also, the e-mail was quite manipulative.
    I guess when I get hung up on from my one friend it's because I'm not agreeing with her or she doesn't like what I say and the same for last night.
    Whose email was manipulative?

    I didn't realize until day before yesterday she was my polar opposite on politics nor that she cared so little until her email last night. Now I know. I am sick of hearing about her new guy but I don't hang up on her.

  6. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dako View Post
    Sounds like you were on a roll with your opinions, and she wasn't in the mood for it. I sometimes get tired of hearing about the war but I still care.
    Well, that's just it. I do get on a roll but I at least like someone not to completely ignore what I say, so I was repeating myself and things were going nowhere. I don't think she really does care about the war but she has mentioned the price of gas on more than one occasion. BTW, I am super anti war and super anti this administration and she's a republican. I only found this out on Sunday. I'm not keen on being friends with republicans, but I'll make an exception in her case. I just find our core values to be very different and theirs flat out horrify me.

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