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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by SamT View Post
    I wish i could get into her head lol

    Don't worry about her head, worry about yours. I know it's easier said than done and it the same struggle most have on this board. You can wonder all day what she is thinking but it gets you no where fast.

  2. #12
    Silver Member tushboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bustertypsy View Post
    Interesting reply! Why do you think it makes them mad? If they initiate the breakup do you not think they would admire you for giving them space?
    I'm just curious as to what you think.
    I can only talk about of personal experience...After I went NC..my EX's immediate reaction was of RELIEF...he was happy that the texting, phone calls everything had stopped. But then as time passed and I got busy with life, he started missing me, he started asking about me from mutual friends....Eventually he contacted me and brought up the fact that how it pissedd him that I had forgotten about him. It has no explanation but NC does work marvellously to heal a broken heart and move on or to reconcile.
    Do you love me because I am beautiful, or am I beautiful because you love me? - Cinderella

  3. #13
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    DG, are you really really not asking for yourself? sorry to be harsh but you need to stick to your NC w/ Dubai girl..

    I think longterm NC diminishes all kinda bad feelings, and the passion, only thing left will be good memories...If you think you connect to EX in the future again, it will be like a new date without remembering bad stuff at first...then everything is roll of a dice...

    cheers

    eric

  4. #14
    Platinum Member midnightrambler's Avatar
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    i wrote an ex fiancee 5 years after she ditched me and i have yet to get a letter.... that has been 5 years since i mailed it. So i am forgotten

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  6. #15
    Gold Member AngryHeart's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SamT View Post
    Hmm Angry Heat, you are making me want to break contact now!

    i wonder if ive given it enough time in NC though...
    but i dont want her to find it easier to leave me with a new guy because were not talking..

    or maybe she is thinking about the good times already!
    I wish i could get into her head lol
    lol, it's up to you. You donnot have to do NC! It's not law! But like I said, you really have to be at a stable point in the breakup. LC can do more damage than good in a lot of cases. You've just gotta be honest with yourself. If you don't get the response you want, if you don't get ANY response, if they only want to be friends...is that going to break your heart all over again?! You really do have to be at a point where the way they react, won't have a big effect on your emotions, health, and healing. I am at a point where my life is imporoving, and he won't be able to change that. I realise I might not ever get him back, and I realise if I don't someone who is worth more will come along. Yes, I do love him and miss him, and want him back. BUT if I don't get him back, I won't go back 100 steps like I would have, and did before. Yes I would obviously be dissapointed, and hurt, but I have people and things around me, and my world won't crash again because of him. See what I mean? Have an honest chat with yourself (atlough maybe not in others company ) and see where you're at.

  7. #16
    Gold Member dreamguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by emalkoc View Post
    DG, are you really really not asking for yourself? sorry to be harsh but you need to stick to your NC w/ Dubai girl..
    Yes, I'm positive. It's not about me and I am not asking myself.
    It was just a general post concerning the dilemma that NC can create about whether or not your ex forgets about you.
    The true course of love never did run smooth.

  8. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by SamT View Post
    I wish i could get into her head lol
    Likewise!

    Not your ex mind you. My ex. Obviously.

  9. #18
    Member Cartman08's Avatar
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    Thanks for this thread, been wondering the same thing & i dont think someone can just stop loving someone that quick can they?

  10. #19
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    My and my girl dated 5.5 years. I was certain LC was the way to go for us. We did it roughly 2 months and it was great. Until you find out she isn't only talking to you but someone else as well. I have been doing NC now and it's a LOT easier. LC can work but you gotta be stable and ready for another letdown in most, not all, cases.

  11. #20
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    I have had experiences with NC with 3 girls, and each time it made them WANT to see me.

    Back in 02 I told a girl that broke up with me, after her wanting to be friends for months, to never contact me again in any way.

    Well a month later of NC she e-mailed, 3 months later she called and wanted to see me. I never did, because she had problems and was wayyy to hurtful in the relationship.


    About 3 years ago I did NC with my current ex. I called after a about a month and asked to go out for coffee. She was happy to hear from me. It worked out and eventually we got back together a few months later. Only after I was DONE trying to get her back, one night I was pissed, I said F*CK this and went home. Swore to myself I would never call her again, and I meant it. She obviously felt it, and called ME to apologize, brought me flowers, said she wanted me in her life etc.

    But she broke up with me again in Nov 07. I have now been in NC for 3 months. And I'm not calling this time. She started dating a guy right after.
    She wanted to see me, but I knew about the guy and she didn't know I knew. So she thought we could be friends. Said she would call me in the future to see each other because she missed me. And was angry when I said I would not see her. F*ck that lets be friends crap. I am not at that point, and may never be.

    So whatever the outcome this time NC is the ONLY choice for me. We were together for 5 years, it hurts like hell still after 3 months of NC. Which is why I must remain in NC until it does not hurt like this. I'll be able to talk to her in the future, because after all I care about her, she was a special person to me for a long time. And honestly, I KNOW she would like to see me, and talk to me. But at this point I cannot give her that satisfaction after what has happened.

    So, NC from my experiences does not make them forget you, it has done the opposite.

    Also when you feel like you've had enough and put your big a*s foot down and mean it, they come crawling back. And the main point in the last sentence is you have to MEAN it and FEEL it. Because when you feel like you have done your best and have nothing to lose, and you don't need them. They always react.

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