Losing my best friends to drugs?

Straightj06 · 02-12-2008, 04:42 PM

My 2 best friends who i would share every memory and tell everything have pretty much slipped away from me. They both smoke weed religiously, not a day goes by where they cant. I used to do it aswell, just socially not every day. Only when i was with them. So say 3 times a week.

But just recently i have seen what it has been doing to me, effecting my work, speech, paranoid that my parents would find out. And its just not worth throwing your life away over a joint. Yeah its a nice social thing to do but it dosnt have to be that way.

Basically i said to them that im going to quit and they wernt happy really. "you will be boring" . . . "it wont be fun no more" . . . "its not right when you dont smoke". Which made me feel like crap.

As i dont smoke no more, clean for 2 weeks now, i have only seen them twice. Thats twice in 2 weeks. I just feel like im breaking away from them, i dont see them the same no more and we no longer connect. They never invite me over no more just because i dont smoke. And when i do call up to see if i can come over, my mate is always too tired. I just feel like crap.

Weed has ruined them i feel, and its ruining our friendship. I just feel lucky that i saw the light, i can think straight now. I have improved at work again and i no longer fear contact with my parents. As i have nothing to hide. Ive tryed talking to my friends about it and there is no way they would quit, not even for me. They just laugh it off.

What should i do?

**melrich** · 02-12-2008, 04:44 PM

Quote:

What should i do?

Never do anything just so you will "fit in". That is simply succumbing to peer group pressure. Be your own man, make your own decisions. If that means friends are going to abandon you for it then they weren't really friends.

Lionel Hutz · 02-12-2008, 04:51 PM

This happens man. Its all a part of growing up. Its something that you are going to have to deal with. One thing though, dont balme yourself. If they say you are not the same then they were never truly your friends, It sucks but it has happended to most of us. Now they will find somone else to chip in on their bags and call them a friend, and the second they decide not to smoke your cell will ring. Just move on with your life and hang with those who are more like yourself.

watupgangsta · 02-12-2008, 04:52 PM

i hear you... i went through the same thing when i was in high school. like mel said, they're not really friends if they abandon you. if thats the case they're just selfish kids who want some company to be losers with. they don't value you for who you are. what i do now is smoke on occasion, but not often at all. it makes doing it better when its not a habit, and it doesn't effect the way you think, act, and feel on a daily basis. if you want to stop altogether thats great too. once you have been away from the whole pothead scene for a little while, you'll start to engage in different things and you'll find people who share the same interests as you

flower99 · 02-12-2008, 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Straightj06

Weed has ruined them i feel, and its ruining our friendship. I just feel lucky that i saw the light, i can think straight now. I have improved at work again and i no longer fear contact with my parents. As i have nothing to hide. Ive tryed talking to my friends about it and there is no way they would quit, not even for me. They just laugh it off.

I'd tell them what you said in hte first 2 lines here. But if you've already done so & they laugh it off....There is nothing you can do. Just be like you said, continue to be happy that you saw the light (: And Good for you, I'm sure this wasn't easy for you but it was wise of you!
If they rather be high than that's sadly thier choice, hopefully they will smarten up soon. but yeah it's part of life, I've lost a number of friends to a number of different drugs. It's hard. But realize you are not responsible for thier decisions.

BeStrongBeHappy · 02-12-2008, 06:29 PM

It is sad, but people do grow up and grow apart.

But i think what this shows pretty clearly is how drugs are not really 'optional' entertainment for them, but at the core of their existence if they can't stop doing drugs long enough to keep up with an old friend who doesn't do drugs. Drugs are obviously the defining factor in their lives, and that is not good at all.

You are doing the right thing to take charge of your life and do what is best for your life, even if it means losing some friends who are themselves getting lost in drugs. I would just let those relationships cool off and work to find new friends.

If any of your old friends decide to come out of their drug haze, they will i am sure come looking for you to get support and grow up themselves.

Jen5283 · 02-12-2008, 06:33 PM

I used to have quite a few pot head friends/party friends. Pretty much all we had in common was having "fun." When I decided to change my life for the better, (which was a gradual change) I realized they weren't ever really true friends. Friends are supposed to be with you through thick and thin!

You're doing the right thing now by distancing yourself even though it hurts. Sometimes life gets worse before it gets better. Change is hard.

02-12-2008, 04:42 PM	#1
Straightj06 Offline Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: UK Gender: Male Posts: 143	Losing my best friends to drugs? My 2 best friends who i would share every memory and tell everything have pretty much slipped away from me. They both smoke weed religiously, not a day goes by where they cant. I used to do it aswell, just socially not every day. Only when i was with them. So say 3 times a week. But just recently i have seen what it has been doing to me, effecting my work, speech, paranoid that my parents would find out. And its just not worth throwing your life away over a joint. Yeah its a nice social thing to do but it dosnt have to be that way. Basically i said to them that im going to quit and they wernt happy really. "you will be boring" . . . "it wont be fun no more" . . . "its not right when you dont smoke". Which made me feel like crap. As i dont smoke no more, clean for 2 weeks now, i have only seen them twice. Thats twice in 2 weeks. I just feel like im breaking away from them, i dont see them the same no more and we no longer connect. They never invite me over no more just because i dont smoke. And when i do call up to see if i can come over, my mate is always too tired. I just feel like crap. Weed has ruined them i feel, and its ruining our friendship. I just feel lucky that i saw the light, i can think straight now. I have improved at work again and i no longer fear contact with my parents. As i have nothing to hide. Ive tryed talking to my friends about it and there is no way they would quit, not even for me. They just laugh it off. What should i do?

02-12-2008, 04:51 PM	#3
Lionel Hutz Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: CrownTown Los Angeles Gender: Male Age: 100 Posts: 1,790	This happens man. Its all a part of growing up. Its something that you are going to have to deal with. One thing though, dont balme yourself. If they say you are not the same then they were never truly your friends, It sucks but it has happended to most of us. Now they will find somone else to chip in on their bags and call them a friend, and the second they decide not to smoke your cell will ring. Just move on with your life and hang with those who are more like yourself. __________________ -KG "Wow! You guys look great. gets pervy thoughts out of head* LOL!"

02-12-2008, 04:52 PM	#4
watupgangsta Offline Silver Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: NJ Gender: Male Age: 21 Posts: 371	i hear you... i went through the same thing when i was in high school. like mel said, they're not really friends if they abandon you. if thats the case they're just selfish kids who want some company to be losers with. they don't value you for who you are. what i do now is smoke on occasion, but not often at all. it makes doing it better when its not a habit, and it doesn't effect the way you think, act, and feel on a daily basis. if you want to stop altogether thats great too. once you have been away from the whole pothead scene for a little while, you'll start to engage in different things and you'll find people who share the same interests as you

02-12-2008, 06:29 PM	#6
BeStrongBeHappy Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 7,417	It is sad, but people do grow up and grow apart. But i think what this shows pretty clearly is how drugs are not really 'optional' entertainment for them, but at the core of their existence if they can't stop doing drugs long enough to keep up with an old friend who doesn't do drugs. Drugs are obviously the defining factor in their lives, and that is not good at all. You are doing the right thing to take charge of your life and do what is best for your life, even if it means losing some friends who are themselves getting lost in drugs. I would just let those relationships cool off and work to find new friends. If any of your old friends decide to come out of their drug haze, they will i am sure come looking for you to get support and grow up themselves.

02-12-2008, 06:33 PM	#7
Jen5283 Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: TEXAS Gender: Female Age: 26 Posts: 166	I used to have quite a few pot head friends/party friends. Pretty much all we had in common was having "fun." When I decided to change my life for the better, (which was a gradual change) I realized they weren't ever really true friends. Friends are supposed to be with you through thick and thin! You're doing the right thing now by distancing yourself even though it hurts. Sometimes life gets worse before it gets better. Change is hard.