My grandma

HajiMaji · 12-24-2007, 04:50 PM

Well, my grandma is still alive but she has cancer, decided not to get treatment, and will die within a month or two. Im 23, I had her in my life for a long time, but I guess I am hurting sorta bad today because I know this will be the last christmas with her.

I am probably being a little over sensitive. I am not trying to make it more dramatic, its just hard to think that everything is going to be different. We are going over to her place as always, and I am greatful for it. It is going to be nice to get this time, but it hurts too I guess.

I also didnt know what to get her this year. I am greatful for the the past holidays and birthdays because my sister and I always made my grandmother something sentimental to let her know how we cared. Shes pulled out the gifts many times since, so I know she appreciated them.

My situation isnt bad. My grandma knows that I love her. I know I had a great grandma. Nothing could really be better, but im just sad shes going to die, and I am sad about this christmas. I am probably just being too emotional though!

Crazyaboutdogs · 12-24-2007, 05:02 PM

No, you are not being too emotional...your grandmother is dying and it is a normal human reaction to be upset. Feel the emotions and know that it is normal. I am sorry that it will be a sad time. Losing someone close to you, and watching their last days is really rough.

Darkness_Falls · 12-24-2007, 05:27 PM

You are not being over emotional, the death of a loved one can be an emotional experience for anyone and everyone.

I was in a similar situation at age 16, my grandma was diagnosed with cancer of the blood. I knew she wasn't going to live much longer so I wrote a letter telling her exactly why I loved her and that she would always be in my heart, and I gave her a gold cross.

7 years on I feel so much comfort from the fact that she knew exactly how I felt about her and that she knew how loved she was and how much she meant to me. Your grandma knows that you love her and this is so important. You are making her time more comfortable and full of love. You truly are a wonderful person for this.

Cherish the rest of your time with her and concentrate on the great times you had together, reminisce with her about memories from the the past.

My thoughts are with you.

RayKay · 12-24-2007, 05:52 PM

It is normal to be grieving. Both my grandparents decided to not have further treatment eventually, and I know if my mother had a recurrence of her cancer (she just turned 50 and was diagnosed two years ago just before Christmas) she won't go through more chemo, and that will be very, very tough.

All you can do is make this Christmas memorable, and share the love you have for her....I bet a beautiful card of scrapbook or poem would be MUCH appreciated.

ilovepoemsalot · 12-24-2007, 05:57 PM

I'm really sorry, HajiMaji.

You're not being too emotional or over sensitive at all.

HajiMaji · 12-24-2007, 08:14 PM

Hey thanks guys. I really appreciate it. Its nice to hear everyone's stories.

I guess I will just take everyone's advice and try to enjoy it. Im not gonna lie though, its sorta hard for me.

HajiMaji · 01-01-2008, 02:25 AM

Well, I had a great christmas with my grandma. Shes really great. Probably the most frusterating thing with all of this, is only recently have I been able to realize how even at 83 she is able to carry on conversations as if we are friends. Although she is from a different time, in the last year I spoke with her about everything in my life. The "new" times overwhelm her sometimes, but she has given me advice that only an 80 year old could. Thats wisdom I cannot get anywhere.

I stayed at my parents place for new years eve. Usually I only come home for christmas, but I felt like i wanted to spend as much time here as I could with my grandma's condition. She came over here for new years eve, and it was wonderful. Shes so great.

I took her home around 9:00. She cant drive at night because of some cataracts. Man... i cant tell you how angry I was dropping her off, and how sad I am now. I am just so angry that I will *likely* never see her again. I mean, only an act of god would have her live until I would get a chance to fly home again.

I realize that these feelings will pass, and everything will be good. I will remeber her well and live with a lot of her values. I am so glad I stayed for new years, and my grandma had a wonderful time. We talked and told stories so much. I just wish she wasnt dying.

**BellaDonna** · 01-02-2008, 02:22 PM

Quote:

I am probably being a little over sensitive.

No way. She's an important part of your life, of course you are going to feel this way.

The other day I saw an advertisement for something I found to be extremely cool:

[Only registered and activated users can see links. ]

I don't know how you feel about it, but it might be a good way to preserve some special memories, and most grandparents would probably be delighted to take part.

12-24-2007, 04:50 PM	#1
HajiMaji Offline Gold Member Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 1,081	My grandma Well, my grandma is still alive but she has cancer, decided not to get treatment, and will die within a month or two. Im 23, I had her in my life for a long time, but I guess I am hurting sorta bad today because I know this will be the last christmas with her. I am probably being a little over sensitive. I am not trying to make it more dramatic, its just hard to think that everything is going to be different. We are going over to her place as always, and I am greatful for it. It is going to be nice to get this time, but it hurts too I guess. I also didnt know what to get her this year. I am greatful for the the past holidays and birthdays because my sister and I always made my grandmother something sentimental to let her know how we cared. Shes pulled out the gifts many times since, so I know she appreciated them. My situation isnt bad. My grandma knows that I love her. I know I had a great grandma. Nothing could really be better, but im just sad shes going to die, and I am sad about this christmas. I am probably just being too emotional though!

12-24-2007, 05:52 PM	#4
RayKay Offline Platinum Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: Middle of Canada Gender: Female Age: 30 Posts: 13,270	It is normal to be grieving. Both my grandparents decided to not have further treatment eventually, and I know if my mother had a recurrence of her cancer (she just turned 50 and was diagnosed two years ago just before Christmas) she won't go through more chemo, and that will be very, very tough. All you can do is make this Christmas memorable, and share the love you have for her....I bet a beautiful card of scrapbook or poem would be MUCH appreciated. __________________ [FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=darkolivegreen][B]<--- [COLOR=sienna]Carbun the Super-Bunny[/COLOR][/B][/COLOR][/FONT] [B][FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=#556b2f][/COLOR][/FONT][/B] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=darkolivegreen][B]At the end of the day, how you imprinted on someones life and heart is the only true mark any of us leave on this earth and is what we are most proud of... [/B][/COLOR][/FONT][I][SIZE=1]- My Biggest Hero and Mentor: My Mum.[/SIZE][/I] [FONT=Comic Sans MS][COLOR=orange][B]Il faut d'abord durer [/B][/COLOR][/FONT][I][SIZE=1]- Ernest Hemingway[/SIZE][/I]

12-24-2007, 05:02 PM	#2
Crazyaboutdogs Online Platinum Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Canada Gender: Female Age: 46 Posts: 15,630	No, you are not being too emotional...your grandmother is dying and it is a normal human reaction to be upset. Feel the emotions and know that it is normal. I am sorry that it will be a sad time. Losing someone close to you, and watching their last days is really rough.

12-24-2007, 05:27 PM	#3
Darkness_Falls Offline Gold Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Gender: Female Posts: 617	You are not being over emotional, the death of a loved one can be an emotional experience for anyone and everyone. I was in a similar situation at age 16, my grandma was diagnosed with cancer of the blood. I knew she wasn't going to live much longer so I wrote a letter telling her exactly why I loved her and that she would always be in my heart, and I gave her a gold cross. 7 years on I feel so much comfort from the fact that she knew exactly how I felt about her and that she knew how loved she was and how much she meant to me. Your grandma knows that you love her and this is so important. You are making her time more comfortable and full of love. You truly are a wonderful person for this. Cherish the rest of your time with her and concentrate on the great times you had together, reminisce with her about memories from the the past. My thoughts are with you.

12-24-2007, 05:57 PM	#5
ilovepoemsalot Offline Join Date: Feb 2006 Gender: Male Posts: 914	I'm really sorry, HajiMaji. You're not being too emotional or over sensitive at all.

12-24-2007, 08:14 PM	#6
HajiMaji Offline Gold Member Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 1,081	Hey thanks guys. I really appreciate it. Its nice to hear everyone's stories. I guess I will just take everyone's advice and try to enjoy it. Im not gonna lie though, its sorta hard for me.

01-01-2008, 02:25 AM	#7
HajiMaji Offline Gold Member Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 1,081	Well, I had a great christmas with my grandma. Shes really great. Probably the most frusterating thing with all of this, is only recently have I been able to realize how even at 83 she is able to carry on conversations as if we are friends. Although she is from a different time, in the last year I spoke with her about everything in my life. The "new" times overwhelm her sometimes, but she has given me advice that only an 80 year old could. Thats wisdom I cannot get anywhere. I stayed at my parents place for new years eve. Usually I only come home for christmas, but I felt like i wanted to spend as much time here as I could with my grandma's condition. She came over here for new years eve, and it was wonderful. Shes so great. I took her home around 9:00. She cant drive at night because of some cataracts. Man... i cant tell you how angry I was dropping her off, and how sad I am now. I am just so angry that I will likely never see her again. I mean, only an act of god would have her live until I would get a chance to fly home again. I realize that these feelings will pass, and everything will be good. I will remeber her well and live with a lot of her values. I am so glad I stayed for new years, and my grandma had a wonderful time. We talked and told stories so much. I just wish she wasnt dying.