Does the physical attraction come back?

i miss her 2 · 12-19-2007, 12:46 AM

Ok, so my girl of 2 years left me in august to see another guy but I basically pushed her towards him I think because I got jealous. She left him, came back to me and while I'm told that at the time they are more attracted to the "rebound" person I am wondering if they ever regain a high physical attraction towards the dumpee? We've been seeing each other again for a while now and we've actually been having sex more than we ever did before. Is it possible that she is more attracted to me now than before?

under_my_amberella · 12-19-2007, 01:07 AM

often people desire what they can't have. if you are too easy (read: they can leave you, stomp all over your heart, and you'll still be waiting for them when it's all over), that's not often the most attractive thing in the world.

however, anything is possible.

d24 · 12-19-2007, 03:34 AM

i'm sorry but i'd have a really hard problem with this.
I've heard this is how swingers work - they take the passion from another 'relationship' into their own to spice things up. It makes thing better for a while , but this is TEMPORARY and sooner or later it'd likely happen again.
You let her leave you for another man, then waited for her to come back, and suddenly she likes you again? Maybe the grass wasn't as green as she thought? Irregardless I think it's an awful thing to leave someone (you) in the lurch while she pursues someone else. Not a nice person.

Re: OP's original question... yes, attraction has been known to be cyclical and can rise and lower over time - it's how we deal with it that determines how strong a relationship can be and what kind of person we are.

Best of luck - if you're happy with the situation and OK with the past I'm happy for you (and you're a stronger man than I am).

12-19-2007, 12:46 AM	#1
i miss her 2 Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 1,146	Does the physical attraction come back? Ok, so my girl of 2 years left me in august to see another guy but I basically pushed her towards him I think because I got jealous. She left him, came back to me and while I'm told that at the time they are more attracted to the "rebound" person I am wondering if they ever regain a high physical attraction towards the dumpee? We've been seeing each other again for a while now and we've actually been having sex more than we ever did before. Is it possible that she is more attracted to me now than before?

12-19-2007, 03:34 AM	#3
d24 Offline Platinum Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: UK Gender: Male Age: 25 Posts: 1,064	i'm sorry but i'd have a really hard problem with this. I've heard this is how swingers work - they take the passion from another 'relationship' into their own to spice things up. It makes thing better for a while , but this is TEMPORARY and sooner or later it'd likely happen again. You let her leave you for another man, then waited for her to come back, and suddenly she likes you again? Maybe the grass wasn't as green as she thought? Irregardless I think it's an awful thing to leave someone (you) in the lurch while she pursues someone else. Not a nice person. Re: OP's original question... yes, attraction has been known to be cyclical and can rise and lower over time - it's how we deal with it that determines how strong a relationship can be and what kind of person we are. Best of luck - if you're happy with the situation and OK with the past I'm happy for you (and you're a stronger man than I am). __________________ "You act as though you haven't seen trees bow to an unborn child before?"

12-19-2007, 01:07 AM	#2
under_my_amberella Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Gender: Female Age: 28 Posts: 5,035	often people desire what they can't have. if you are too easy (read: they can leave you, stomp all over your heart, and you'll still be waiting for them when it's all over), that's not often the most attractive thing in the world. however, anything is possible.