hearing his voice

bobsiesprincess · 10-13-2007, 08:28 AM

so.....ive had a bad couple of day neway. cant get memories of us 2gether out of my mind. finding it really hard 2 study so i was just looking through my phone n i found some sound clips on it and didnt know what they were. so i listened to them and one was him saying im the best girlfriend in the world. this has made me hysterical, i cnt stop crying. ijust miss him so much, my life is meaningless without him. i would give anything to turn back time and be back with him.

astrobaby · 10-13-2007, 09:09 AM

Oh sweetheart im so sorry.

I know how you feel. I saw my ex out last night. It was weird, as we both, for some reason, studiously ignored each other, perhaps it was just easier or neither of us knew how to approach the other, but thats how it was.

But i saw her, and she looked beautiful. And i heard her voice. It got to me later on.

Im more healed than you are, but i do remember being where you are. Feeling exactly as you are now. It will get better. PM me if ever you need to, or add me on msn, i'll listen and give any advice i can.

It will get better i promise. I know everything is empty and meaningless now, but it will change, even though you cant possibly see or imagine how, it will.

astrobaby · 10-13-2007, 09:17 AM

And i just wanted to add, your life is not meaningless. It means every bit as much with or without him.

Jess... · 10-13-2007, 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bobsiesprincess

one was him saying im the best girlfriend in the world.

Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!! (((hugs))) My jaw dropped when I read that part, and my whole body went cold - I could feel exactly what you must be feeling.

I have done this. I have several clips of the ex on my old phone, and I listened to them one day, they are just silly ones of me trying to tickle him (he had the funniest laugh when he was tickled) and him saying "don't kill me, don't kill me!!" (he HATED being tickled!) but I can imagine if I heard what you heard, I would be hysterical too.

I'm so sorry darling, try and put the phone away and not listen to it if you can. Stay strong I know it's so hard - we're here for you

bobsiesprincess · 10-13-2007, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jess...

Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry!! (((hugs))) My jaw dropped when I read that part, and my whole body went cold - I could feel exactly what you must be feeling.

I have done this. I have several clips of the ex on my old phone, and I listened to them one day, they are just silly ones of me trying to tickle him (he had the funniest laugh when he was tickled) and him saying "don't kill me, don't kill me!!" (he HATED being tickled!) but I can imagine if I heard what you heard, I would be hysterical too.

I'm so sorry darling, try and put the phone away and not listen to it if you can. Stay strong I know it's so hard - we're here for you

my whole body went cold too. it was us laughing at the start and then he said that. i can remember when he recorded that. i can remember lying in his room just enjoying being with each other. ive deleted it now so theres no chance i can listen to it again anyway. how can i go from being the best girlfriend in the world to meaning nothing to him? this hurts so much.

Jess... · 10-13-2007, 11:34 AM

Good job deleting it

that took guts, and is something I probably wouldn't have done. (I'm very sentimental and like to keep things. My mother likes to call it "hoarding" haha)

There are some things in life that we will just never know. I guess this is one of them. I know how much it hurts. But trust me - it will get better. I've been where you are, and I've beaten it. You'll get there, it won't happen overnight - but it WILL happen. Stay strong (((((hugs)))))

MarkD · 10-13-2007, 11:42 AM

thats what I keep asking myself too. being with someone for so long and sharing every piece of you with them....letting them get so close to you, and then NOTHING. It's like you never existed. What really gets me, is that someone could meet my ex one night, and they would have more of a relationship then we do now. That makes me so sad.

Im sorry for being no negative....Im not in a good place right now either..I hate weekends

Sadman84 · 10-13-2007, 12:33 PM

I had a few videos of my ex too. One we were driving and I was filming her, she took a sip from her cup and then said "you're a brat" lol

then i had one of her trying on an ugly dress for my mom and I was just laughign as i was taking the video.

These hurt, but one day it wont hurt to see them, and one day you'll meet a guy who will return the love you have for him. And that will be when you realize why this person is your ex.

HajiMaji · 10-13-2007, 02:03 PM

I am so sorry you are feeling all of this. In my opinion this is one of the toughest things to go through.

Hearing those things would definately send me spinning. I wanted to say two things. First, I know how bad it hurts. I have to say though, each tear you shed is important for your healing. I am not saying that you should go out of your way to feel sad, but when you do feel sad, you are still making progress. Once you cry about the same thing 50 times over a few months you start to care about it less. Its so painful to go through, but it has an end.

Secondly, I know the feeling of life feeling "meaningless" after a loved one leaves. When you are with someone you have your own identity within the relationship, but there is a large portion of your soul dedicated to the relationship. You make decisions and plans based off the presence of another person. When that person is gone it feels like the large portion of yourself that you dedicated for these types of thoughts has no function anymore. For me this leads to a feeling of meaninglessness. How could it not? You dedicate so much of yourself to this thing that is now gone. It takes a while to get every part of yourself back, even in healthy relationships.

The only answer is to feel pain for as long as you need to until it goes away. That sucks the most. There are a few things you can do to help cope, but no matter what you do you are going to feel really down. And i am sorry for that!

Papillion · 10-17-2007, 08:17 AM

i got one on my phone where she is in my bathroom hanging a towel on the rail and she turns to me and stands smiling thinking i'm taking a pic, then you hear me say "well say something then" and she says "oh its a video!".

daft, but sentimental. i remember it very well.

in fact i'm going to look at it one last time now and then delete it. i wonder if i'll feel anything. keep y'all posted.

10-13-2007, 08:28 AM	#1
bobsiesprincess Offline Silver Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Scotland Gender: Female Age: 23 Posts: 329	hearing his voice so.....ive had a bad couple of day neway. cant get memories of us 2gether out of my mind. finding it really hard 2 study so i was just looking through my phone n i found some sound clips on it and didnt know what they were. so i listened to them and one was him saying im the best girlfriend in the world. this has made me hysterical, i cnt stop crying. ijust miss him so much, my life is meaningless without him. i would give anything to turn back time and be back with him.

10-13-2007, 11:34 AM	#6
Jess... Offline Gold Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: I come from the land down under! Gender: Female Posts: 1,157	Good job deleting it that took guts, and is something I probably wouldn't have done. (I'm very sentimental and like to keep things. My mother likes to call it "hoarding" haha) There are some things in life that we will just never know. I guess this is one of them. I know how much it hurts. But trust me - it will get better. I've been where you are, and I've beaten it. You'll get there, it won't happen overnight - but it WILL happen. Stay strong (((((hugs))))) __________________ Sometimes it's the risk of getting hurt that's beautiful...

10-17-2007, 08:17 AM	#10
Papillion Offline Gold Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: London, UK Gender: Male Age: 41 Posts: 844	i got one on my phone where she is in my bathroom hanging a towel on the rail and she turns to me and stands smiling thinking i'm taking a pic, then you hear me say "well say something then" and she says "oh its a video!". daft, but sentimental. i remember it very well. in fact i'm going to look at it one last time now and then delete it. i wonder if i'll feel anything. keep y'all posted. __________________ - Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths, Enwrought with golden and silver light, The blue and the dim and the dark cloths of night and light and the half light, I would spread the cloths under your feet: But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

10-13-2007, 09:09 AM	#2
astrobaby Offline Silver Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: uk Gender: Male Age: 29 Posts: 317	Oh sweetheart im so sorry. I know how you feel. I saw my ex out last night. It was weird, as we both, for some reason, studiously ignored each other, perhaps it was just easier or neither of us knew how to approach the other, but thats how it was. But i saw her, and she looked beautiful. And i heard her voice. It got to me later on. Im more healed than you are, but i do remember being where you are. Feeling exactly as you are now. It will get better. PM me if ever you need to, or add me on msn, i'll listen and give any advice i can. It will get better i promise. I know everything is empty and meaningless now, but it will change, even though you cant possibly see or imagine how, it will.

10-13-2007, 09:17 AM	#3
astrobaby Offline Silver Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: uk Gender: Male Age: 29 Posts: 317	And i just wanted to add, your life is not meaningless. It means every bit as much with or without him.

10-13-2007, 11:42 AM	#7
MarkD Offline Silver Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Gender: Male Age: 33 Posts: 371	thats what I keep asking myself too. being with someone for so long and sharing every piece of you with them....letting them get so close to you, and then NOTHING. It's like you never existed. What really gets me, is that someone could meet my ex one night, and they would have more of a relationship then we do now. That makes me so sad. Im sorry for being no negative....Im not in a good place right now either..I hate weekends

10-13-2007, 12:33 PM	#8
Sadman84 Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Age: 25 Posts: 281	I had a few videos of my ex too. One we were driving and I was filming her, she took a sip from her cup and then said "you're a brat" lol then i had one of her trying on an ugly dress for my mom and I was just laughign as i was taking the video. These hurt, but one day it wont hurt to see them, and one day you'll meet a guy who will return the love you have for him. And that will be when you realize why this person is your ex.

10-13-2007, 02:03 PM	#9
HajiMaji Offline Gold Member Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 1,081	I am so sorry you are feeling all of this. In my opinion this is one of the toughest things to go through. Hearing those things would definately send me spinning. I wanted to say two things. First, I know how bad it hurts. I have to say though, each tear you shed is important for your healing. I am not saying that you should go out of your way to feel sad, but when you do feel sad, you are still making progress. Once you cry about the same thing 50 times over a few months you start to care about it less. Its so painful to go through, but it has an end. Secondly, I know the feeling of life feeling "meaningless" after a loved one leaves. When you are with someone you have your own identity within the relationship, but there is a large portion of your soul dedicated to the relationship. You make decisions and plans based off the presence of another person. When that person is gone it feels like the large portion of yourself that you dedicated for these types of thoughts has no function anymore. For me this leads to a feeling of meaninglessness. How could it not? You dedicate so much of yourself to this thing that is now gone. It takes a while to get every part of yourself back, even in healthy relationships. The only answer is to feel pain for as long as you need to until it goes away. That sucks the most. There are a few things you can do to help cope, but no matter what you do you are going to feel really down. And i am sorry for that!