Catholic Guilt?

Flap Jack · 09-03-2007, 09:12 PM

Hey,
I was raised Catholic and learned that homosexuality and well, sex in general is bad.I am struggling to accept my attraction for men. Yes, I'm a guy. I'm seeing a openly gay counselor and was wondering if anyone has read any books or anything that has helped them "accept" themselves over the years. Let me know. I'm tired of feeling bad about myself. Thanks.

ostego · 09-03-2007, 09:22 PM

i havent read any books, and i'm not a high priest or anything, but let me tell you this. You do whatever the hell you want to do! You were raised a catholic, but that does not mean you must be one, don't feel guilty about this.... YOU are YOU, you're not Catholicism! Just because you have roots in an organised religion, and may belive in its teachings, theres no reason to restrict yourself in any way, YOU come before religion!

Dako · 09-03-2007, 09:33 PM

Flap,

The Church is a real puzzle for people raised in that faith, but there are other churches that embrace gays without a loss of the importance of a spiritual life.
[Only registered and activated users can see links. ]

AwdreeHpburn · 09-03-2007, 09:53 PM

awwwww....I'm so sorry FlapJack. I hate to think there's an organisation out there that preaches the teachings of who they claim is a saint but really are just serving to make people feel bad about who and what they are.

I hate that with a fiery passion.

I'm sorry for what you're experiencing and I hope you can learn to accept yourself because there are many others who will as well.

but really......... lol - when I first saw the title of this thread - no lie - I thought it read: Catholic Cult....

fivespot · 09-03-2007, 10:12 PM

I've got a gay friend and he's said the same thing.

I was raised catholic, but personally, as I've gotten older, things have changed a lot for me.

I can't say I've lost faith...I've just lost faith in the human institutions we call organized religion.

I tried to explain this to my friend. I'm not comfortable embracing anyone (or anything) that rejects people because of their traits, views, whatever. You can be called bigot because you hate someone because of their skin color, but you're holier-than-thou if you hate gays?

I'm don't know if it's homosexuality is right or wrong. I'm staight. But one thing I do know is it's wrong to hate people for their beliefs or views, etc. If that's what some religions teach, then count me out.

AwdreeHpburn · 09-03-2007, 10:16 PM

^^ well said fivespot!

fivespot · 09-03-2007, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AwdreeHpburn

^^ well said fivespot!

Ha ha, thanks!

Actually, stories of homosexuality is brought up in the bible mostly in the old testament. Probably the most famous one is sodom and gomorrah. I think Paul brings up the subject in the new testament, but think of all the things that have been rejected by modern catholics that the bible actually says is "God's Law."

I mean, some jewish traditions (who only accept the old testament) still follow the rules of kosher foods, like no pork or shellfish. But catholics have rejected this. When was the last time you heard that a catholic wasn't allowed to eat pork or lobster? Yet, the old testament is accepted and part of catholic tradition.

That's another thing I like about religions...pick and choose the rules when it's convenient.

finn · 09-03-2007, 11:04 PM

Hi Flap Jack,

I'm gay chick and i was also raised in the Catholic faith. I can understand the conflict you have inside, being taught one thing while feeling something that goes against those teachings. I'm no longer involved with the church but before i left, i did find some peace with myself.

I looked at it like this - God in his infinite wisdom created man in his own image, therefore i (in all my gayness

) am a reflection of him. There is nothing wrong with being gay, and my personal beliefs lead me to view God not as an all fearing entity who snoops into the bedrooms of every person. For me, God is less concerned about who you sleep with and more inclined to judge you on your actions.

I think if you are a good person in your heart and actions, always trying to do the best for yourself and everyone you meet, then you have nothing to worry about.

It is really simplistic, but it helps get me through the tough times.

**Hope75** · 09-03-2007, 11:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flap Jack

Hey,
I was raised Catholic and learned that homosexuality and well, sex in general is bad.I am struggling to accept my attraction for men. Yes, I'm a guy. I'm seeing a openly gay counselor and was wondering if anyone has read any books or anything that has helped them "accept" themselves over the years. Let me know. I'm tired of feeling bad about myself. Thanks.

I was raised protestant and we were taught that God loves everyone and accepts everyone.

I know that the Catholic church can be very strict but maybe just adopt of a bit of the protestant ideas behind God- it makes more sense and it's a heck of a lot easier to swallow.

Flux · 09-05-2007, 07:14 AM

I was also raised catholic, but now I've grown up (a bit) I've made a decision for myself on what I want to be and how I want to be it...

Religion is a choice not a force, so simply you make the choice. No religion should be able to condenm a person because of who they are or their choice. There is no evidence for this religion to exist so there is no reason for you to be ashamed... and the bible is full of contradictions, he hates gay but he loves everyone!?!

But its down to you what you want to do. fight yourself and become honest open and comfortable with it... or do what I did, ditch the 'catholic' on my personal data sheets so it reads 'none' under religion

But good luck..

09-03-2007, 09:12 PM	#1
Flap Jack Offline Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 7	Catholic Guilt? Hey, I was raised Catholic and learned that homosexuality and well, sex in general is bad.I am struggling to accept my attraction for men. Yes, I'm a guy. I'm seeing a openly gay counselor and was wondering if anyone has read any books or anything that has helped them "accept" themselves over the years. Let me know. I'm tired of feeling bad about myself. Thanks.

09-03-2007, 09:22 PM	#2
ostego Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: UK Gender: Male Age: 17 Posts: 205	i havent read any books, and i'm not a high priest or anything, but let me tell you this. You do whatever the hell you want to do! You were raised a catholic, but that does not mean you must be one, don't feel guilty about this.... YOU are YOU, you're not Catholicism! Just because you have roots in an organised religion, and may belive in its teachings, theres no reason to restrict yourself in any way, YOU come before religion! __________________ <-- before i got a tan :S :( Set me free, your heaven's a lie!

09-03-2007, 09:53 PM	#4
AwdreeHpburn Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Tiffany's Gender: Female Age: 37 Posts: 4,637	awwwww....I'm so sorry FlapJack. I hate to think there's an organisation out there that preaches the teachings of who they claim is a saint but really are just serving to make people feel bad about who and what they are. I hate that with a fiery passion. I'm sorry for what you're experiencing and I hope you can learn to accept yourself because there are many others who will as well. but really......... lol - when I first saw the title of this thread - no lie - I thought it read: Catholic Cult.... __________________ What i really meant to say, is that I'm sorry for the way I am......

09-03-2007, 10:16 PM	#6
AwdreeHpburn Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Tiffany's Gender: Female Age: 37 Posts: 4,637	^^ well said fivespot! __________________ What i really meant to say, is that I'm sorry for the way I am......

09-03-2007, 09:33 PM	#3
Dako Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Gender: None Specified Posts: 9,113	Flap, The Church is a real puzzle for people raised in that faith, but there are other churches that embrace gays without a loss of the importance of a spiritual life. [Only registered and activated users can see links. ]

09-03-2007, 10:12 PM	#5
fivespot Offline Gold Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Gender: Male Posts: 793	I've got a gay friend and he's said the same thing. I was raised catholic, but personally, as I've gotten older, things have changed a lot for me. I can't say I've lost faith...I've just lost faith in the human institutions we call organized religion. I tried to explain this to my friend. I'm not comfortable embracing anyone (or anything) that rejects people because of their traits, views, whatever. You can be called bigot because you hate someone because of their skin color, but you're holier-than-thou if you hate gays? I'm don't know if it's homosexuality is right or wrong. I'm staight. But one thing I do know is it's wrong to hate people for their beliefs or views, etc. If that's what some religions teach, then count me out.

09-03-2007, 11:04 PM	#8
finn Offline Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Australia Gender: Female Age: 29 Posts: 20	Hi Flap Jack, I'm gay chick and i was also raised in the Catholic faith. I can understand the conflict you have inside, being taught one thing while feeling something that goes against those teachings. I'm no longer involved with the church but before i left, i did find some peace with myself. I looked at it like this - God in his infinite wisdom created man in his own image, therefore i (in all my gayness ) am a reflection of him. There is nothing wrong with being gay, and my personal beliefs lead me to view God not as an all fearing entity who snoops into the bedrooms of every person. For me, God is less concerned about who you sleep with and more inclined to judge you on your actions. I think if you are a good person in your heart and actions, always trying to do the best for yourself and everyone you meet, then you have nothing to worry about. It is really simplistic, but it helps get me through the tough times.

09-05-2007, 07:14 AM	#10
Flux Offline Gold Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: UK Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 506	I was also raised catholic, but now I've grown up (a bit) I've made a decision for myself on what I want to be and how I want to be it... Religion is a choice not a force, so simply you make the choice. No religion should be able to condenm a person because of who they are or their choice. There is no evidence for this religion to exist so there is no reason for you to be ashamed... and the bible is full of contradictions, he hates gay but he loves everyone!?! But its down to you what you want to do. fight yourself and become honest open and comfortable with it... or do what I did, ditch the 'catholic' on my personal data sheets so it reads 'none' under religion But good luck..